


Figure It Out

by Kymbersmith90



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Actors, Alternate Universe - Human, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-02-23 08:03:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 68,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13185825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kymbersmith90/pseuds/Kymbersmith90
Summary: A lot can change in 3 years. Careers can rise and fall. Friends come and go. And relationships begin and end.





	1. Prologue.

**Author's Note:**

> **I need a break from editing the next chapters of Fairytales and Rule The World, so I figured I would share this with you all. It's something new I've been working on, now that Rule The World is coming to an end.**
> 
>  
> 
> **This was heavily influenced by a night browsing Jen's Instagram account, so this Emma is going to share a lot of her characteristics, I'm afraid. And I'm aware of how this story begins, and how it sounds. But, I'm hoping you'll trust me enough to see where I take these two this time, and why I made the choices I have done, so far.**

When he found her that afternoon, sat in his trailer, with her hands clasped together, and her head hanging down, Killian knew exactly what was going on.  

“You’re leaving.” 

It wasn’t a question. He could tell her answer from her posture.  He’d known something had been bothering her all day. But, he’d just chalked it up to the weight of the decision currently resting on her shoulders. 

Ever since she’d come him, to that first day, to let him know that, unlike their co-stars, she hadn’t signed that contract extension, when it was offered to her, Killian had known this day was coming. Emma had said she’d needed time, to work out her options. And she’d spent most of the rest of her night, pacing the floor of his trailer, talking through the pros and cons of leaving, when her contract was up. 

She’d tried talking herself into staying.

She’d ranted about how guilty she’d feel, if her decision resulted in the end of the show. And she spoke about how angry the fans would be with her, for giving up on them. 

But each time, Killian had assured her that she needed to make the right decision for _her_ and not for everyone else. 

So, it wasn’t really a surprise that she’d decided to leave. 

“Yeah,” she replied softly. “I’m sorry, Killian. I tried. I tried to talk myself into staying but it’s just not the right decision for me. Not now, anyway.” 

“Don’t be sorry,” he assured her, dropping down next to her on the sofa.  Killian pulled her into his side, offering her the tightest hug he possibly could.  “You’re doing the right thing, Emma. Follow your heart. It won’t steer you wrong.” 

Emma turned around and folded herself into Killian’s waiting arms, to cry out the relief she felt at his acceptance. When she’d finally come to her decision, it had been his reaction that she had most feared.  Killian was, by far, the best friend she’d made on the show. She didn’t want to lose that friendship, just because she’d felt like it was time to move on. 

“I’m gonna miss seeing you every day,” she chuckled tearfully into his neck. 

“Well, if you miss me _that_ much, I’ll Facetime ya every morning before work.” 

Emma laughed into his shoulder, at his words. She knew Killian well enough to know he’d do exactly that, if she asked him to.  And a large part of her _really_ wanted to ask him to. 

“I’m not so sure your wife would approve of that,” she said instead, as she pulled back to dry her tears.  “But you’ll definitely keep in touch, right?” 

“Of course I will, Emma,” he replied, looking a little hurt at her insinuation.  “I’m gonna miss you too, you know?” 

“I um… I haven’t told the other yet,” she explained softly. “You’ll keep this to yourself, won’t you?” 

“Of course. You can trust me.” 

And she did.  

Killian knew more about Emma than the rest of their cast and crew combined.  The two of them often spent late nights together, on set, talking about everything and nothing at all. Emma had even once joked that Killian was her soulmate, in a completely platonic, and friendly, manner.

He just seemed to get her, in a way that very few others ever did.

“Dinner?” Emma offered suddenly, as she stood up and wiped her palms down her jeans.  “My treat, Jones.” 

“Well, how’s a guy supposed to refuse that?” he stood up too, and gave her hand a quick squeeze, before starting for his bathroom.  “I just need to shower and change, and then give Milah a quick call, to let her know what’s going on. Then I’m all yours, Swan.” 

“You know where to find me, when you’re ready. Tell Milah I said hi,” Emma chuckled, as she slipped out of his trailer, and closed the door softly behind herself.

When she was gone, Killian stripped himself out of the clothes wardrobe had left for him that morning, before turning his shower up and stepping in.  The water was just the wrong side of hot, stinging rather than pleasurable, but he needed that pain right then. 

While he’d been expecting Emma’s decision, that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. 

She was the first friend he’d made in the business, and the two of them had clicked instantly.  For the best part of a decade, she’d been a huge part of his life, with the two of them seeing each other more days a week than they didn’t, even when they weren’t filming.

He couldn’t imagine another season without her.

But, he’d already signed on that stupid dotted line. 

Milah had told him to stick with the show that gave him his big break, as it was a consistent and well paid income.  But hearing that he’d be doing it, without Emma by his side, had him regretting that decision for the first time since he’d signed on to the show to begin with. 

Killian slammed his fist into the wall above his shower head in frustration, before he turned to let the water rush over his back.  

He needed to get a grip on his emotions, before he faced Emma again. She might not have made her decision public, yet, but he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he ended up being the reason she chose to stay.

He absolutely would not be the cause of her unhappiness.  

Emma deserved better than that.


	2. Chapter 1

** 3 years later **

“Hey, Stranger, how’s it going?” she teased, as she made her way into his trailer once more, like she always did.

Killian pushed aside the papers he’d been staring at for the last hour, to pull his best friend in for the warmest and tightest of hugs. “How are you doing, Ems?” he asked, breathing in her familiar scent once more.

“Not too bad,” she chuckled, pulling back to get a good look at him. “Apparently, much better than you have been.”

Killian huffed out a laugh, as he nodded his head to the small table tucked into the corner. Emma followed him over to it, before taking the seat next to his. “What’s going on?” she asked.

“I’ve missed you,” he deflected. But it was a painful truth. Killian’s life the past three years had changed dramatically, but the part he missed the most was her constant presence in it.

The first year back on set, without Emma, had been the worst kind of torture. Every day he’d walked back in to his trailer, expecting to see her sat there, waiting for him. And every day, the silence in it would taunt him.

Sure, they still messaged, emailed, and called. They met for coffee, or dinner, whenever their schedules would allow it. And Emma had returned for a couple of episodes each year, when she was free.

But it wasn’t the same.

“Stop stalling, Jones, and tell me what’s on your mind,” she commanded.

Killian picked up the papers that had been taunting him all week, before he handed them over to her. Emma flicked through them briefly, before understanding dawned on her face.

“Have you signed them yet?” she asked softly.

“Nope,” he sighed. “I should. I should have signed them the moment they arrived. But I just…. I can’t.”

“Hey.” Emma reached out a gentle hand, to run down his back. “It’s okay, Killian. I understand.”

“You do?” he asked, a little skeptically.

“Sure. I mean… I haven’t been divorced before, but I think I can see why this is so hard for you. You still love her.”

Killian hung his head, almost as if he were ashamed of that fact. “Yeah, I do,” he agreed. “I mean, I know I demanded this. And I know that I _hate_ her for what she did to me. For how she made me feel. But…. she’s the only person I’ve ever loved, Ems. It’s just _hard_ to sign these and know that it’s all gonna be over.”

Emma slid in a little closer, to wrap her friend up in a gentle hug. “I know, Killian. And I don’t think anyone expects you to stop loving her, as a result of this. But… for your own peace of mind… ask yourself if this is the right thing to do. Because, whatever decision you make, you’re gonna have to live with it.”

He tilted his head down to rest against Emma’s shoulder, just basking in her comfort, for the longest of minutes.

Emma had been the first person Killian had called, that fateful day in October, when he’d returned early from a night shoot to find some arsehole’s dick in his wife’s mouth. She’d dropped _everything_ to fly out to Los Angeles that night, to console her friend. She’d listened as he’d told her the whole sordid affair. She’d been patient with him, as he tore apart the hotel suite he’d rented, taking his anger out on it, as he yelled everything he wished he could have brought himself to yell at Milah. And she’d been there to hold him, as he finally cried himself to sleep, mourning the loss of his marriage.

She’d also been there the next morning, with a soft smile, coffee, and a promise to stay as long as he’d needed her. Emma had stayed an extra three days after, to help Killian process what had happened. Never once did she push him to do something he didn’t want to do. Instead, she’d just sat and listened, as her friend talked it all through, and came to the decision himself.

She’d finally left the day he contacted a divorce attorney, to begin the procedure.

“Ma thinks I should have signed theses the second they arrived, to be free of the, ‘toxic bitch’ once and for all.”

“But your Ma isn’t in love with Milah,” Emma explained gently. “Do you think you could make it work?”

“No,” he replied instantly. “I don’t trust her. I’m not sure I could _ever_ trust her again.” There were still moment where he closed his eyes and saw _tha_ t image, burned behind them.

When he’d returned to his apartment, after Emma had left, Milah had tried to beg him to stay. She’d suggested couples counseling. She’d told him it would never happen again. She’d even promised to do anything he wanted, as long as he forgave her for her mistake.

But Killian couldn’t take her up on any of her offers.

It had only been three days, but every day, since that night, he’d woken up to wonder what his wife was doing. And, more importantly, who it was with.

She’d broken his trust, and he knew that going back to their marriage, as if nothing had happened, wouldn’t be an option. Forgiving her would mean trusting her, and he simply couldn’t do that. Forasmuch as Killian hated her for what she’d done to their marriage, he wouldn’t condemn her to a relationship where she was essentially leashed to him, for the sake of his own sanity.

So, instead, he’d told her to take the car and to leave.

“Then, I think you know what you need to do,” Emma explained patiently.

Killian turned to her, to place a sweet kiss to her forehead, before he pulled the papers back over, and signed where he’d been instructed to.

It felt so strange that one simple signature could signal the end of his marriage. And while a large part of him wanted to mourn it, another part was relieved that this would finally be the end of it all.

No more negotiations.

No more begging for second chances.

No more comments from his mother, about how much better off he would be now.

Instead, he could finally focus on getting on with his life.

And, what better way to do that, than to celebrate his birthday, with Emma by his side once more.

“Wanna go grab some coffee before we have to head to wardrobe?” he asked her.

“Always,” she chuckled, as if getting coffee was the most natural thing to do, after one signs their divorce papers.

“Lead the way, Swan.”


	3. Chapter 2

Having Emma back on set was a cruel tease for Killian. With her by his side once more, running through the city, as their characters hunted down the latest suspected terrorist, he could almost close his eyes and pretend that the last three years had all been some kind of cruel joke.

He could almost pretend that his life wasn’t slowly crumbling down around him.

“God, I forgot how much I hate running in heels,” Emma moaned, as they dropped down at a table together, for lunch. “I have yet to see a female law enforcement officer, of _any_ kind, on the streets, in four-inch heels. Why do they make me wear these?”

Killian snorted into his sandwich. Emma’s love-hate relationship with the shoes wardrobe put her in had often been part of their daily banter. She loved how pretty they were, but hated how much they pinched. “They elongate your legs,” he explained.

She cocked a brow in his direction before asking, “Is that your way of telling me I have nice legs, Jones?”

Killian blushed an adorable shade of red, and Emma giggled wickedly at it.

She’d always loved making him blush, since the very first moment they had met. Killian was a fully-grown man, with an army of fangirls who would happily throw themselves at his feet. And yet, he had always seemed so sweet and innocent to her. He’d not yet been corrupted by Hollywood, the same way some of her former co-stars had been. And it was that genuineness within him that had first caught Emma’s attention.

It was why the two of them had clicked so easily. At heart, they were very similar people.

“Tell me about all the newbies?” she asked eagerly, as she cast a look around the craft service’s tent. There were very few familiar faces amongst the sea of people gathering to eat.

Since Emma had left three years ago, the cast and crew of the show had changed drastically. Her contract wasn’t the only one that had come to an end, and seeing their leading lady throw in the towel, a number of others had followed suit soon after, hoping for the same success she’d achieved.

Killian had contemplated walking away a number of times himself.

But, every time he gave it some serious thought, he just couldn’t seem to bring himself to act upon it. He’d caught Milah cheating less than a year after Emma’s departure from the show. And, since then, his life had gone through more than enough changes. As much as it wasn’t quite the same as being able to work with his best friend every day, the show was the one constant in his life that Killian wasn’t yet ready to part with.

It was also still his biggest connection to his best friend.

“They’re okay,” he replied cautiously. “I don’t really know most of them all that well.”

If he were completely honest with himself, Killian would have to admit that he didn’t _want_ to know them well. Emma had been the first person in the industry that he’d really gotten close to. And while he would _never_ begrudge the choices she’d made, having her walk away had been one of the toughest points of his career.

He didn’t want to put himself in that kind of position again, anytime soon.

“And your new leading lady? Anna, right?” she pressed.

“Ashley,” he corrected. Anna had been his leading lady the year before. And, like Claire, the year before her, she’d only lasted a season before deciding that a network television drama, about two partners in the FBI, wasn’t really what she wanted to do with her life.

“Ashley then,” Emma continued. “What’s she like? We’ve got scenes with her tomorrow, right?”

“She’s a nice enough girl,” Killian replied. “And yeah. Tomorrow afternoon.”

Emma gave her friend a look that told him that she knew he wasn’t telling her everything, but that she wouldn’t push him for the details. Just yet. It was unlike Killian not to form a bond with the people around him. He might have been painfully shy when it came to meeting new people, but he was also incredibly polite. Making friends had always come naturally to him.

“I can’t wait. Maybe they’ll give me some flat fucking shoes to run in,” she mumbled to the table, in an attempt to lighten the mood.

It clearly worked, as Killian couldn’t stop the snort of laughter that escaped him, at her words.

* * *

“Where on _earth_ are we going?” she asked, as Killian pulled the car onto an unfamiliar street.

When she’d left the show, Emma had made the decision to put her home in Los Angeles up for sale. Since then, any time she’d returned to the city, she’d either opt to stay at a hotel, or she’d stay at Killian’s apartment. (At his insistence). It might have been three years, but she could still make that drive from the studio, back to her friend’s home, with her eyes shut.

“Milah got the apartment in the divorce,” he explained carefully. “I bought a new place.”

“How did she get the apartment? She _cheated_ on you. She should have walked away with fuck all. And you guys aren’t even officially divorced yet.”

“It was easier this way,” he explained vaguely. Killian didn’t want to have to explain to Emma about how his soon-to-be ex-wife had dragged out the divorce process for as long as she possibly could, until he’d offered her their former home to settle it quickly.

He also didn’t want to have to explain to her how happy he was to be free of it. While the apartment arguably held some of his most cherished memories, they’d all been tainted by his wife’s adulterous actions. When he’d returned to his home, after kicking her out, Killian had purchased an entirely new bedroom package for the master bedroom, in the hopes that it would help him to shift the images that flashed behind his eyes, every time he entered the room.

After a week of sleepless nights inside it, laying on a brand-new bed, dressed in brand-new sheets, he’d given up, and moved into the spare bedroom instead.

“Well, as long as you’re happy,” Emma stated, turning a little in her seat to face Killian.

That was all she wanted for him.

It was all she’d _ever_ wanted for him.

“I’m happy now you’re here,” he assured her, reaching for her hand.

Emma didn’t hesitate to slide her palm into his, and squeeze it reassuringly, as she dropped her head down to rest against his shoulder. “We just need to make sure we make good memories this weekend,” she told him. “Christen the place a little.”

“You make it sound like you’re planning to urinate all over it,” he snorted.

“If you get me drunk enough I might,” she fired back.

As Killian pulled the car up to the private gate that lead down to his road, Emma perked up a little in her seat, having noticed which part of the city they were now in. Killian might have been driven from his home, by his ex-wife, but he’d certainly gotten the last laugh, given the house he’d upgraded to.

“Oh, do you have a pool? I might have to visit more often if you do.”

“Wait and see,” he chuckled.

Emma didn’t need to know he’d bought the house because it reminded him of her.

Or that he’d hoped the inclusion of the indoor heated pool might help to tempt his best friend into visiting a little more often, in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Thanks for reading and all of your wonderful comments.**


	4. Chapter 3

Emma finally got her opportunity to meet Killian’s new leading lady the next day, as Ashley joined the two of them on set, just after lunch.

Both women had long blonde hair, and were roughly the same height and build. But Ashley appeared to be about five years younger than her predecessor. Apparently, the network were aiming for a new angle this year, as she was playing a rookie cop, teamed up with Killian’s more experienced special agent.

Yet, the first thing Emma noticed about the slightly younger woman, was how her eyes seemed to track Killian’s every move, wherever he went, around the set.

“Hey, Killian,” Ashley greeted confidently, when the two of them finally finished their scene, and made their way over to her. “How’s your week going?”

“It’s great thanks,” he replied enthusiastically. “It’s always good when my bestie’s back on set.” He nudged Emma gently, and she chuckled at the teasing lilt to his voice.

“Yeah, yeah… you say that now,” she warned. “You’ll be calling me every name under the sun, on Saturday night.”

“Why, what are we doing Saturday night?” he asked, turning worried eyes her way. There were still gaps in his memory from some of the promotional parties they had attended together, in the past. Killian was certain one of them had ended with the two of them drinking tequila together, on a boating lake, a few years back.

“I haven’t quite decided, yet. But there’s no way we’re not celebrating, Mister. So, don’t even think about trying to pout your way out of it.” Emma turned away from the inevitable puppy-dog eyes that would surely follow her words, as their makeup artist made her way onto set, ready to touch them up for the next scene.

“Can’t we just Netflix and chill?” Killian called after her.

She almost tripped over her own feet at his words, as she spun round to face her best friend. He looked so adorably innocent that she knew he had completely missed the hidden meaning behind his words.

“I um… I don’t think that means what _you_ think it means,” she told him, holding back her embarrassed giggles, as the crew around them failed to stifle their own.

When Emma turned back to face Marion, Killian pulled his phone out to Google the term.

* * *

The rest of their work day passed by uneventfully. Ashley might have had a huge crush on Killian, (and she was doing very little to hide it), but she was also a professional when the cameras started rolling. In between takes, she would sit quietly and reread her lines, while Emma and Killian spent their time goofing off, and filming outtakes they knew would make the gag reel, at the end of the season. The ratings for episodes Emma returned to always shot up, and the fans loved seeing her appear on the gag reels, even if she was no longer a main part of the show.

“So, um… are you busy tonight?” Ashley asked Killian, as they made their way off set, and headed back in the direction of their trailers. Emma was dawdling slightly behind them, talking with one of the camera men that had been on the show since the very beginning. He was one of only a handful of people she still recognized, and friendly faces were always a welcome addition to her day.

“Emma and I are probably just gonna catch up a little, and watch some TV. You?” he asked politely, while internally cringing. He’d lived through the opening of these conversations before, and they always ended with Ashley inviting him out someplace different, for the night. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to dismiss her, outright. His mother had raised him too well for that.

“I was gonna go out to dinner, with a few friends. You can always join us?” she offered… just as he had expected.

Killian chuckled awkwardly, as he brought his hand up to scratch behind his right ear. “Thanks, but… I think we’re just gonna have a quiet night in. It’s been a while since we last saw each other, so we’ve got a lot to catch up on.”

Ashley’s face fell a little, but she recovered quickly. “Oh, I um… I didn’t realize you two were dating.”

“We’re not,” Killian hurried to assure her. He didn’t need _that_ rumor circulating on set, while he was in the middle of finalizing his divorce. If Milah found out, she’d refuse to sign the papers, and have her lawyer start demanding more of his stuff. Although, at this point in time, Killian wasn’t really sure how much more she could take from him. “Emma’s just staying with me while she’s in town. It makes more sense than renting an entire apartment, or a hotel room, for just a few days.”

“Okay, well… you have my number if you change your mind,” Ashley offered. Killian could see the hope in her eyes, burning behind her words. He hated turning her down, but he really wasn’t interested in dating anyone at that point in time.

He smiled kindly as he watched her leave for her own trailer, while Emma snuck up behind him. “How many times have you politely let her down this season?” she asked, rising onto her toes to prop her chin on his shoulder.

“Too many,” he sighed, tilting his head back against hers. “You’d think she’d get the message by now.” He broke away from his best friend with a sigh, before reaching forward to pull the door to his own trailer open. Theirs was probably not a conversation they should be having in public. While Killian was not exactly a fan of Ashley’s constant flirting and attention, he also didn’t want to hurt the girl.

“You’ve never been tempted?” Emma wondered. “I mean, not just by Ashley, but by anyone at all?” She pulled the door closed behind her, and made her way over to drop down, onto Killian’s couch. She’d been running in those damned heels again, and her feet were killing her.

“Nope,” he replied honestly, leaning back against the counter to watch as she wrestled with her boots. “I’m still technically married,” he pointed out.

Killian wasn’t entirely sure why, but the conversation felt incredibly forced and awkward. None of his conversations with Emma had _ever_ felt that way before.

“I think when your wife cheats on you, you get a pass on dating before the divorce is finalized,” she argued.

“What about you?” he challenged, hoping that turning the conversation around would help to make it feel more normal. “All we ever seem to discuss is work, our families, or _my_ personal life. Are you seeing anyone? Has nobody caught your eye yet, Swan?”

“Nobody that’s returned it,” she whispered down to the floor.

Killian pushed himself away from the counter, to slide into the seat next to hers, as he wrapped her up in his arms.

“Well… that’s their loss,” he stated confidently, pressing a kiss to the side of her head. “Any guy would be lucky to have you, Swan.”

Emma allowed herself a moment to soak up his comfort, before she pulled out of his embrace, and straightened up a little. “Okay, Jones, how about we get ready to head back to your place? While I was in London, earlier this year, I took a few cookery lessons. I’ve been dying to make a toad in the hole for you, given how you used to never stop banging on about it.”

Killian groaned a little at the thought of one of his favorite meals, prepared at home, by someone he cared for. Nothing could beat the kind of love that infused a home cooked meal.

“Have I told you recently that I love you, Swan?”

“Not for at least a few hours,” she chuckled.


	5. Chapter 4

Before he knew it, Killian woke on Friday morning to find Emma ready to say her goodbyes once more. The five days she’d spent on set had been both the best, and the fastest, of his year.

And he wasn’t quite ready to let her go again.

“Okay, Jones,” Emma declared, during their final afternoon on set, as she let herself into his trailer once more. “We have reservations this evening, and then I have something special planned for you after.”

Killian groaned as he sank back into his couch. He knew that Emma meant well, but he wasn’t sure he was in the mood for a party. “I _really_ don’t wanna be that guy, but can we not just stay in? I…” he sighed as his eyes struggled to hold her own, and instead, flicked down to the floor. “I don’t need Milah seeing reports of the two of us together. She’s not exactly making the divorce easy.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” Emma moved quickly across the small room, before she dropped down into a crouch in front of him. In an attempt to make Killian meet her eyes, she brought her hands up to rest on his knees, and used her thumbs to rub reassuring circles into the tight muscles just above them. “How much is she asking for?”

“Enough,” he laughed, bitterly. “But… I have a decent lawyer, so she’s not getting anywhere _near_ as much as she wants. It’s just…” As he spoke, Killian’s hands reached down for Emma’s, pulling them off his knees and into his own, to fiddle with absentmindedly. Her presence in his life had always helped to ground him. “I know Milah. I know that this isn’t just about the money. This is her way of stalling. And I know that if there’s even a _hint_ of a rumor in one of the trash rags, she’s gonna use that as _another_ excuse to stall. I’m just… I’m ready to have her out of my life, Ems.”

Emma slid easily into Killian’s arms, as she pulled her best friend in for a hug. He’d always been a private person, but she knew that he confided in her, more than he did anyone else in his life. She just wished he’d felt comfortable enough to share _this_ piece of information with her sooner.

“I’m sorry, Killian. I’m sorry she’s making such a difficult situation even harder for you.”

Killian squeezed her a little tighter, before he finally pulled back. “It’s okay. I guess it’s just her way of showing how much she still cares. Enough to drag out the divorce, but not enough to keep her knickers on,” he laughed bitterly.

“Well… if you’d rather stay home, we can. But… the reservations I made were for that small Italian place you love. So, I doubt we’ll be spotted together there. And your birthday surprise is a private event too. No paps there either. But, I’d understand if you’d rather not risk it. I can call and cancel. I’m happy, just as long as I get to spend the night with you.”

Killian smiled down at his friend, endlessly grateful for how well she knew him. Of course she’d booked events for the night that would be private. Even without the divorce hanging over him, Emma knew that Killian preferred something quieter and more intimate, as opposed to big flashy parties.

“We can go,” he chuckled. “But… let’s stay away from the tequila tonight.”

“Deal,” Emma beamed back at him. “Now, go and get showered. You kinda stink.”

Killian snorted out a real laugh, as he stood up and threw a cushion in her direction, before heading for his bathroom.

* * *

“Wow, Ems. Look at you.”

Emma looked down at herself, before flicking confused eyes back up to meet Killian’s. “You’ve seen me dressed up before.”

“Yeah. I guess I have,” he agreed. “You just… I dunno… you look pretty tonight.” He tried to wave the comment away as nothing important, but Emma still felt her face flame as bright as the red of the pants she was wearing.

“Well, I figured for my best friend’s birthday, I should make an effort.” Knowing where they were headed for the evening, Emma had opted for comfort, as well as style. Her red; lace; sleeveless shirt gave an enticing peek at the maroon colored bra she wore underneath. It was tucked into a pair of bright-red; high-wasited pants, which also covered the nude patent pumps she had chosen, for the night.

She looked effortlessly glamorous, but also ready for what the rest of the evening had to offer.

“Thank you. I appreciate the effort.” Killian handed her a small glass, filled with some kind of amber liquid, before explaining, “I figured we could have one, before heading out.”

“I think you’re trying to get me drunk,” Emma chuckled, as she knocked the whiskey back in one smooth move.

“Maybe later,” he winked, before downing his own drink, as the call signaling the arrival of their car came in.

* * *

Dinner was everything Killian hadn’t known he’d wanted, for his birthday. The food was as exquisite as it always was, but the company was even better. He and Emma talked throughout the meal, just as they always had before. The comfortable banter was something that had always come easily to the two of them, and even though time and distance separated them more often than not, he was relieved to note that their dynamic certainly hadn’t changed over the years.

“So, tell me about your next role?” he asked, as they waited for their plates to be cleared, and dessert to be served.

“I thought we weren’t talking about work tonight,” Emma deflected.

“We’re not. We’re talking about your career,” he argued. “Now, stop stalling and tell me what’s next, in your busy schedule.”

“It’s um… it’s a Spielberg piece,” she replied softly, smiling nervously down at her glass.

“Holy shit, are you serious?” Killian gasped. He’d known that Emma’s career had improved, since leaving the show. She’d gone from bit-parts in indie movies, to slightly larger roles in blockbuster hits. But she’d also been very cagey about what the future held for her, every time he’d asked.

“Yeah. I still can’t quite believe it,” she chuckled.

“Why not?” he scoffed. “You’re the most talented actress I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with. Tell me more. I wanna know all about your character.”

Emma blushed a little more, as she fiddled with the stem of her wineglass. She hadn’t yet told anyone about the role. A large part of her was convinced she’d dreamed the entire encounter. But, the filming schedule had arrived in her mailbox, the day before she’d left New York. And it had been burning a hole inside of her bag, ever since.

“It’s um… it’s a lead role,” she explained, the disbelief shining through in her voice. “I’m first on the call sheet.”

“Holy fuck, Emma.”

“Don’t look so surprised,” she teased.

“I’m not. I’m just… _so_ happy for you. This is like… the best birthday gift you could have ever given me.”

“You haven’t heard the best part yet,” she chuckled, as he reached over to take her hand into his. At Killian’s quirked brow she explained, “We start filming in the summer. _Here_. I’ll be in LA for roughly three months.”

Killian didn’t care that he was making a scene in the middle of the restaurant. He pulled his friend up from her seat, and into his arms, in one fluid move. He squeezed Emma to him as tightly as he could, as he whispered, “I’m so proud of you,” into her hair.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Emma's look here is based on Jen's look for the Baby Driver Premier on the 26th June 2017.**
> 
> **Thanks for reading, and all of your lovely messages on Tumblr.**


	6. Chapter 5

Emma’s birthday surprise for Killian turned out to be tickets to a private gig, for one of his favorite current bands. It had taken her months to finalize her plans, as she’d reached out to numerous management teams, in an attempt to find one that would be performing somewhere close to LA. She knew that Killian preferred the smaller, more intimate gigs, over their usual tour dates. So, it had felt like Christmas had come early, when a month after her initial call she had received a reply, letting her know that an event had been scheduled for the weekend of Killian’s birthday.

“Emma, this is incredible,” he praised, as they made their way over to the small bar along the back wall, to grab some drinks, before taking their seats. Emma had made sure to reserve their usual table for the evening, so that they could enjoy the performance together, without disrupting others around them. “You really didn’t need to go to all of this trouble for me.”

“Don’t be stupid,” she chided. “You’re my best friend. I had to come up with something special for you. How else would I be deemed worthy enough to keep that title?”

He chuckled, as he leaned down to press a kiss to her bare shoulder, before a startled declaration of, “Killian?” had his head shooting back up again.

Killian could feel Emma’s frustration as it coursed through her body, while he smiled politely at the group of women stood between the two of them, and the bar. “Ashley,” he greeted. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“Me either,” she replied, with excitement coloring her tone, and sparkling behind her eyes. “I thought you were just planning to stay home this weekend?”

“We were,” Killian rushed to assure her. He wasn’t sure why. He could hear Emma’s unspoken, _you don’t owe her an explanation_ ringing through his mind, even as he offered one. “But, Emma wanted to do something special to celebrate.”

“Of course. Your birthday. I completely forgot.” Ashley’s eyes briefly flicked over to Emma, before settling back on Killian once more. Emma would have been more annoyed by the easy dismissal, but she couldn’t exactly blame the girl. Even dressed casually, in a dark purple button-down, and a pair of dark wash jeans, Killian still looked better than everyone else in the room. “Did you want to join us?”

“We have our own table,” Emma interjected, as she finally caught the bartender’s eye, to place their order. “But thanks anyway.”

Ashley looked a little shocked at Emma’s clipped reply, but she shook it off quickly. “Of course. Well, enjoy the performance,” she offered, as her friends led her away, in the direction of their own seats.

Killian cringed a little at the awkward exchange, before pushing his way through the crowd to rejoin Emma, who was already at the bar. “Sorry about that,” he mumbled.

“Don’t be,” she chuckled. “Trust me to pick a place to celebrate your birthday, that your biggest fan just happens to already be at.”

“Well, if it’s any consolation, it looks like her table is on the other side of the room,” Killian chuckled.

He slipped the bartender a fifty before Emma could get her wallet out, and turned to head for the small table they always used, with his best friend glaring at the back of his head, the entire way over.

* * *

“So, I’m gonna need more details about that new role,” Killian teased, as they waited for the band to take to the stage. He was grateful that Emma always planned ahead, because they were close enough to have a great view of the stage, but tucked away from the main bulk of the room, which would give them the perfect opportunity to talk, without disrupting the people around them.

“This is your birthday treat,” Emma protested. “Can’t work talk wait until tomorrow?”

“Nope. That is also part of my gift. I wanna know everything.”

Emma spent the next twenty-minutes detailing the script her agent had sent her for the movie, and how she had instantly fallen in love with it. She knew it wasn’t an award-winning piece, but the screenplay had blockbuster hit written all over it. Her agent had originally suggested that Emma audition for the role of supporting actress, and Emma had been more than happy for the arrangements to be made for it.

But, when she’d gotten into the room, and had come face-to-face with the legendary director himself, she was certain she’d blown her chances.

“I swear,” she told Killian, “I have _never_ been so terrified in my entire life.” Her best friend chuckled a little at the thought of Emma turning into one of the fangirls they’d often encountered, around Steven Spielberg. She was usually the cool, calm, and collected one, in their partnership. “I managed to get the lines out for them, but I was certain they’d laugh at me, when I was out of that room. I mean, my voice had gone all high-pitched and squeaky, and I looked like I’d just run a marathon, with the amount of sweat I was producing.”

Killian snorted out another laugh, before stating, “Real sexy, Ems… But, you clearly impressed them.”

“Yeah. I still have no idea how,” she whispered in awe. “When my agent called to say that they’d offered me the _lead_ role, I thought he was playing some kind of cruel trick on me. Or worse, that I was imagining the entire bloody thing. It didn’t feel real until all of the contracts started coming through for signing.”

Killian pulled Emma into his side, to press a kiss into her perfectly wavy hair. “I’m so proud of you, Ems. And I can’t wait to see that script, when we get back home.”

She didn’t have time to say anything else, as their host for the evening was making his way on stage, ready to introduce the band.

* * *

The band put on a wonderful show, that had Killian grinning widely throughout the evening. Emma wasn’t too fussed about their music. She would listen to it often, because Killian usually had something playing either in his trailer, in the car, or at home. But it wasn’t the kind of music she’d actively seek out, to listen to.

That night, she simply enjoyed watching her best friend, as he took in the show.

When he didn’t think anyone was watching, Killian would sing along to his favorite songs, just low enough for Emma to be the only one in the room to hear him. He’d clap and cheer loudly in all the right places, and she was pretty sure she could feel his leg bouncing, to the beat of the music, underneath their table.

Every so often he would lean in to whisper something to her, about the song that was being played. Small things like where he was when he first heard it, or a memory he always thought of, because that song happened to be playing in the background. (Such as the time when the two of them had woken with a craving for French toast, but didn’t actually have any bread in the apartment. Instead of going out to buy some, Killian had found some sachets of dried yeast in the cupboard, from Milah’s past bakery experiments, and they had attempted to bake their own. Emma laughed when she realized that the next song the band played was the one that had also been playing in Killian’s car that morning, when they’d finally given up their attempts at baking, and had decided to go out for breakfast instead).

Every few songs he’d drop a kiss to her shoulder, and whisper his thanks for everything she’d done for him, that night. He’d tell her how lucky he was to have her as his friend, and how much he loved her.

Emma would run a gentle hand though his hair, and smile softly down at her tipsy friend. It was her silent way of assuring him she felt the same, even if speaking the words were no longer possible for her.

Because those three small words meant something completely different for Emma, than they did for Killian.


	7. Chapter 6

When Emma and Killian made it back to his house, later that evening, they were both on the giggly-side of tipsy, and well on their way to flat-out-drunk.

“Ugh, I needed this,” Killian sighed, as he flopped back onto his couch. He hadn’t laughed as much as he had that night, since he’d caught his wife cheating on him.

“Can I let you in on a little secret,” Emma whispered, as she dropped down next to him.

Killian had his head tilted back against the cushions, and his eyes closed. But Emma knew he was still awake. “Of course,” he replied slowly, as he cracked open one eye, and turned his head to face her.

“Remember that idea I told you about, for a screenplay?” Emma busied herself pouring them both another drink, so she wouldn’t have to look at him as she spoke. Killian only had one neglected bottle of rum left in the house. But they were both too drunk to care about that.

He had to make himself work a little, to recall the conversation Emma was talking about. She had once mentioned her desire to write her own screenplay, but that was _years_ ago, and in his drunken haze, it was taking him longer than usual to access the details of _that_ particular exchange.

“Of course,” he finally gasped. “The one about that war vet, right?”

Emma nodded her agreement, before taking a sip from her glass. Killian gave her a couple of minutes to compose herself, in the hope that she’d continue her story.

“I wrote it,” she finally whispered.

“You did?” he gasped. “Can I read it?”

“I think we’re both too drunk for that,” she snorted. “But maybe when we’re sober?”

“ _Definitely_ when we’re sober. Are you gonna pitch it?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed. “It’s not good enough for that. I just…. After that conversation we had, the one where you gave me that big speech and told me to, ‘follow my dreams?’ I kinda felt like I had to get it out of my head, and onto paper.”

“Promise you’ll let me read it?” he begged. “As your muse, it’s the least you can do to thank me.”

“Muse?” Emma snorted. She only ever snorted when she was drunk. And she rarely allowed herself to drink enough to qualify for drunken status, without Killian around. “Thinking a little highly of yourself there, aren’t ya?” she teased.

“Pfts. You and I both know I’m your creative muse. I bet you even based your male lead on me.”

Killian watched as Emma’s cheeks flushed adorably, and the moment seemed to sober him… just slightly. “Holy shit, Ems. Did you base your lead on me?”

“Well… you were the one who told me to write the fucking thing in the first place,” she defended hotly.

Killian hated how his friend hung her head in embarrassment, and mentally berated himself for making her feel that way. Emma had always been a creative person. She was destined for greatness, both on and off screen. But, making that leap had been difficult for her. The last thing he wanted to do was make her think that he wouldn’t support her in this new venture, one-hundred percent.

“Hey, I’m sorry,” he apologized softly. “I didn’t mean to tease you. I’m… well… Honestly, Emma? I’m flattered you’d be thinking of me when you wrote it. And I _really_ can’t wait to read it. I already know it’s going to be the best damned screenplay of the year.”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” she mumbled. “But, if we remember this conversation tomorrow, I promise I’ll send you a copy when I’m back in New York.”

“Oh, I’m not forgetting this,” Killian promised her.

* * *

When he woke the next morning, it was with the worst case of dry-mouth, and a pounding headache. The rum the night before had _definitely_ been a bad idea.

Killian hadn’t drunk that much since drama school.

“Morning,” he mumbled, as he made his way through the house, and into the kitchen.

“Ugh. Nothing good about it,” Emma grumbled. “Why’d I let you talk me into that?”

“Me?” he scoffed. “You were the one who said that we should open that bottle of rum.” Killian made his way round to Emma, to snag a couple of painkillers for his headache, before he pulled her into his side, to press a kiss to the top of her head. “I missed you, Emma.”

“I’ve missed you too,” she whispered back, leaning into his embrace. Their moment was cut short by the shrill ringing of Killian’s phone, and he groaned as he gave his friend one more squeeze, before moving away from her to answer it.

He flicked a glance down to the screen, and then over to Emma, before giving her a flat smile as he left the room. Killian didn’t need to say who was calling, for her to know. The only time he’d ever felt the need to take a call out of her hearing range was when his wife was on the other end of the line.

Emma kept herself busy whipping up a quick pancake batter, for the two of them to share for breakfast. But, before she could begin to pour any into a skillet, she was startled by Killian’s outburst of, “Because unlike you, I actually _believed_ in our wedding vows.” There was more frustrated mumbling that she couldn’t quite make out, before Killian stormed into the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Emma moved quickly away from the stove, flicking off the gas as she did, to pry his cellphone out of his hand, before he could damage it. “You wanna talk about it?” she asked, gently coaxing his fists to open, so she could slip her hands into his.

“No,” he snapped, before his face softened in contrite. “Sorry. I just… _someone_ saw us together last night.”

“And she jumped to the conclusions you thought she would,” Emma finished for him. She had been so sure that they would be able to enjoy a private evening out together. Now, she was kicking herself for ever suggesting it. “I’m sorry, Killian. This is all my fault.”

“Hey, it’s not,” he assured her, as he linked their fingers between the two of them. “I had fun. I don’t regret last night, so I don’t want you to regret it either. My lawyers can handle Milah.”

“Does she really think we’ve been sleeping together?” Emma asked curiously. She and Milah had always gotten along well, before the divorce. They’d had a couple of girly weekends away together, in the past, and Milah had never once given off the impression that she was worried about the other woman in her husband’s life.

“Nah. I think if she truly believed you were a threat, she’d have spoken up when we used to spend twelve hours a day together. She’s just trying to cause problems. She seems to think that delaying the process will make me come to my senses and realize I can’t possibly live without her.”

Emma pulled her friend in closer, to wrap her arms around his waist. She wished there was something more she could do to make the process easier for him. Killian was the purest soul in her life, and she knew that as much as he tried to hide it, the divorce was eating him up inside.

“I’m um… I’m gonna take a quick shower,” he told her, pulling away gently.

“Okay. I’ll get started on the pancakes. Orange and sugar?”

Killian chuckled a little at the face she pulled over his choice of pancake topping, before bending to press a kiss to her hair. “Always,” he replied. “Love you, Ems.”

* * *

Emma waited until she heard his bedroom door close upstairs, before she pulled out her phone to do a little digging of her own.

It didn’t take her long to find the source of Milah’s latest ammunition.

Instagram stories might have only lasted for twenty-four hours, but it was long enough for Milah to cause her best friend a little more pain, on his birthday weekend.


	8. Chapter 7

Emma had expected her friend to explode with anger, when she finally showed him what she’d found, after breakfast. But instead, Killian had simply watched the video through a few times, before declaring, “I’ll take care of it,” as he locked her phone and handed it back to her.

“That’s it?” she asked. “That’s all you’re gonna say?”

“What do you want me to say, Emma?” he sighed. “Right now, I’m more focused on the fact that I’m driving you to the airport in a few hours. I’d _really_ rather enjoy what little time we have left together, instead of dwelling more on the shit show that is currently my life.”

“Killian… your life is not a shit show,” she soothed, running a gentle hand down his back. “It might feel like it right now, but I can promise, it’ll get better.”

He leaned back into her touch, but didn’t say anything else. In that moment, he wanted the peace and hope that Emma somehow always managed to fill him with, more than he wanted to argue with her about just how much had gone wrong for him, over the last three years.

“Now… I think someone made some promises of a Spielberg script that she really should deliver on,” he quipped, as he tilted his head back to look up at her.

Emma chuckled as she leaned down to press a kiss to his forehead, before she ran upstairs to search through her bags. She’d known Killian would want to see everything when she told him about the role she’d been offered. So, she’d made sure to pack it all. He was one of only a handful of people in her life, who would understand why things like casting sheets and locations would excite her. It was only natural that she’d want to share that excitement with him.

By the time she’d made it back downstairs, her friend had fixed them both fresh mugs of coffee, and had settled himself comfortably in the lounge.

“Someone’s eager,” she giggled, as she dropped down next to him.

“I’m not even a little ashamed of that,” Killian replied. “There will probably _never_ be another time in my life where I get to read a Spielberg script, before production.”

“Hey, I have faith you will,” she assured him softly. The conviction behind her words completely sobered the atmosphere in the room, and Killian once again found himself counting his blessings. For everything in his life that was going wrong in that moment, he still had Emma’s unwavering support. And that filled him with more hope than he could ever explain.

“Well… you could always put in a good word for me… for the sequel,” he teased gently, hoping to lighten the mood once more.

“Damn straight I will.”

For the next hour, Killian and Emma read through her script together, gushing over the writing, as he practically vibrated with joy, for the massive role his best friend had landed.

“This is the best thing I’ve read all year,” he mumbled, as he flicked the last page closed, and turned the document over in his hands. “I can’t stop reading it.”

“I’ll have to request an extra copy for you,” she snorted.

“I truly hope you’re not joking.”

Emma sniggered at her friend’s tone, but made a mental note to work up the courage to ask Mr. Spielberg to sign a copy for Killian. She had a feeling she’d be winning _Best Friend of the Year_ again, with that gift.

“You know, as we’re filming in LA, you could always come and visit me on set?” she mused.

“Again… I _really_ hope you’re not joking.”

The house was silent for a moment as Killian fiddled with the script in his hands, and Emma watched him closely. She could tell the moment he’d decided to voice whatever was on his mind, as the tips of his ears began to turn an adorable shade of pink.

“So, um… now that you’ve sold your place here, what are you thinking of doing for accommodation when you film?” he asked eventually.

The question was so random that Emma’s brow creased with confusion.

“The studio will put me up for the duration of filming,” she explained slowly. She wasn’t quite sure where Killian was going with his line of questioning, though. Emma knew that this was something he would already be aware of. He’d worked in the industry long enough to know all of the standard contractual terms. He might have spent more of his time in television, but he’d filmed a couple of movies over the years, that had offered to do the same for him, when they were shooting outside of LA.

“You could always stay here,” he whispered into his lap. “I mean… I have plenty of room. And that way, I’d still get to see you, even on your busiest days.”

“Killian,” she sighed. Emma was touched by his gesture. She loved that he wanted her close, while she was in the city. And every fiber of her being was _screaming_ at her to accept the offer, because she _always_ wanted to be close to him. But, they’d never lived together before, and she wasn’t sure this was the ideal time to start. She didn’t want to risk their friendship over something stupid, like her tendency to be slightly messy, where her friend was always anally clean. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea. You just got your life back, after getting out of your marriage. Are you sure you’d want me around the house?”

A thought struck her suddenly, like a punch to the gut, and Emma had to swallow back the bile that rose in her throat.

Killian might not be ready for another relationship _now_ , but that didn’t mean that he wouldn’t be, by the time summer came around. His divorce would be finalized by then, and he would be free to date whoever he liked. Emma knew there was no way their friendship would survive, if she had to watch him bring some random woman home, while she was living there.

“ _Of course_ I’d want you here,” Killian assured her, completely clueless to the internal war raging inside of her. “You’re my best friend, Emma. I know all your dirty secrets already.”

Her eyes snapped up to meet his at that declaration, and Killian wiggled his brows playfully at her. She was sure there was no way he knew _all_ of her secrets. Surely he’d have said something already, if he did?

“I know how much you hate emptying the dishwasher. And how you have a tendency to throw your dirty laundry into a pile _in front_ of the laundry basket, and not actually in it. None of that is gonna change all of this.”

She sighed with relief as she forced herself to chuckle at his words. Apparently, Killian was more perceptive than she gave him credit for being.

Until it came to seeing her true feelings for him.

“You’ll barely be here,” he continued. “That script is gonna have a grueling filming schedule. We both know that. Surely you’d rather come home every night to a hot meal and a friendly face, over room-service and pay-per-view?”

Emma softened a little at his argument. He had a good point. She _would_ much rather come back to his place every night, where she could truly rest and relax. Even if it was just laying quietly on the sofa reading, while Killian watched one of those shows on the Discovery Channel, that he was so fond of.

“Besides…. I bet my pool is nicer than the one the hotel will have. And here, you won’t have to worry about guys leering at you in a bathing suit.”

With that one short sentence, Killian had found her biggest accommodation weakness.

“Uh, the pool,” she sighed. “I never got to try the pool. Fine, Jones. We can give it a shot. But… if I piss you off, you have to promise to tell me to go. Because I am _not_ ruining almost a decade of friendship with you, just because you get angry with me for not putting my laundry in the damned hamper.”

“I can do that,” he agreed.

“And no leering at me in a bathing suit,” she teased.

“Eh… I can’t promise that,” he chuckled, as he leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Thanks for reading, and all of your lovely compliments and messages on this piece.**


	9. Chapter 8

Killian was already in a bad mood when he made it to set Monday morning. Knowing what was waiting for him didn’t make things any easier.

He’d driven Emma to the airport the previous afternoon, like he always did, when she came back for a special guest role. They’d said their goodbyes in the car, and Emma had pressed one final kiss to his cheek, before sliding out of the vehicle. With a promise to call when she landed, she’d closed the door softly behind herself and walked straight in to the building, without looking back. Nothing about their interactions or goodbyes had changed, over the last three years. Yet, the moment she’d closed the door behind her, Killian had felt himself deflate.

Later that evening, after she’d called to let him know she’d landed safely, and to thank him for letting her stay, Killian had told himself that her absence stung more than it usually did, because for the first time in his life, he was truly alone once more. Milah wasn’t there to help soothe his pain, or to distract him with her newest hobby, like she had been in the years before. There was no out-of-tune humming, or loud clanking in the kitchen. Robin wasn’t there with a cold beer, and a crappy movie for them both to critique, while discussing his nephew’s crazy behavior.

The house was just still and silent.

Emma had teased, before she’d left, that his place was more of a show-home than an actual home, so Killian had decided to make the most of his free evening. With his best friend coming to stay while her movie filmed, he wanted her to feel more comfortable in the house. The stark whiteness of the interior, and the lack of soft furnishings, left him feeling a little cold at times, but Milah had always been the one to add those homey touches. Without her around, he’d left the house the same way he’d bought it. But, his best friend was the complete opposite of cold and boring. She was bright and bubbly. Full of love and life. Emma deserved to feel like the place was just as much her home, as it was his.

So, that evening, while he waited for a pizza to be delivered, Killian did a little online shopping. He ordered sheets and cushions for her room, in various shades of red, knowing that it was her favorite color. He threw in some fancy looking candles, and vases too, with the intention of making sure Emma would wake every morning, to the smell of fresh flowers. And when all of that was done, he went in search of a reliable interior designer, who could help him add the life to his home, that it was so severely lacking.

When Killian finally shut down his laptop, it was to find that empty feeling had started clawing its way back in again. In an attempt to push it aside, he’d decided to cling to a different emotion instead.

Anger.

The anger that was building by the minute, over their invasion of privacy, for his birthday celebrations.

The anger growing inside of him, at the mere thought of having to confront it the next morning, at work.

“Ashley? Can I have a word?” he asked, the moment he spotted her in the makeup trailer.

“Sure,” she replied cheerily, turning her phone up to him. “Say hi to the Insta followers.”

“Now is _really_ not the time,” he warned darkly, as he turned on his heels and stormed out of the small room.

It took Ashley a few moments to remove her protective gown, and scramble out of her chair, before she was jogging after him. Killian might have been angry, but he didn’t want to humiliate the poor girl in front of their colleagues. He also knew that their confrontation needed to happen in private, if he had any hope of keeping it between the two of them.

“What’s going on?” she asked, as she climbed the steps into his trailer. Ashley had never been inside of it before. Killian’s was definitely more luxurious than hers was. But, given his time spent on the show, she could kind of understand why.

“You posted a video to Instagram on Saturday night.”

“I post videos and pictures to Instagram most nights,” she replied slowly. Ashley wasn’t really sure where he was going with his line of questioning.

“One from the gig. Of me and Emma. Together,” he ground out.

“Yeah. I thought your fans would like to see you guys together. You know they go crazy for this non-relationship you both claim to have, right?”

“We _don’t_ have a relationship,” he snapped. “Emma is my _best friend_. But now, thanks to your stupid video, my wife is trying to claim that _I’ve_ been cheating on her, so she can change the terms of our divorce once more.”

“I don’t understand,” Ashley whispered softly. “You were kissing her.”

“I’ve _never_ kissed Emma.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. Killian knew they exchanged plenty of friendly kisses. But they had never shared a _kiss_ before. Not even on-screen.

“You were kissing her all night. The two of you looked like a couple, Killian. Most of your fans think you’re secretly dating. It’s not exactly my fault that your wife assumed the same thing. Hell, I’d have divorced you too, in that situation.”

Ashley realized her mistake the moment Killian’s eyes snapped up to meet hers. He’d always been a little distant with her, when they were around each other on set. She’d heard the whispers that he was in the middle of a divorce, so she’d assumed that was the reason why.

But he’d _never_ looked as hostile as he did in that moment.

“ _I’m_ divorcing my wife,” he ground out, through gritted teeth. “She gave me the wonderful, once-in-a-lifetime experience of walking in on her, with another man’s dick down her throat. And ever since that night, she’s been doing _everything_ possible to stop this from going through. I’ve already given her my car, and my home, and all of our friends. Your little video now has her wanting a good chunk of my salary too. Do you have _any_ idea how stupid you were? Even if Emma and I were a couple, you don’t go around shooting video footage of two people _without_ their consent. And you sure as hell don’t post it to the fucking internet.” Killian was almost vibrating in anger, as he took a step back, and tried to clear the red haze that was slowly descending. He knew that Ashley wasn’t the true target of his ire. But the poor girl had been the one to load that gun. “Pull a stunt like that again, and I’ll have you fired,” he threatened darkly, before turning his back on her. “Now… get the hell out of my trailer.”

With his back turned, the only sign that she’d left was the soft click of the door, as she closed it behind her.

Killian brought his hand up to run through his hair, tugging at it a little more forcefully than he should have, in his anger. He hated the way it was consuming him, running through each of his veins, and boiling the blood within them. It had never been like that before. Killian had always thought of himself as a cool, calm and collected individual.

Until his wife had betrayed his trust.

Ever since that night, he’d always felt on the edge of completely losing himself to the darkness that was constantly clawing at his mind.

His eyes landed on the half-full glass of water, that stood on the counter closest to him, and he reached out to send it flying in the direction of the now closed door. The smash it made on contact was momentarily satisfying, until the guilt of what he had just done hit him square in the chest.

“Oh, God,” he sighed. “Stupid fucking idiot.”

He pulled out his phone with trembling hands, and hit dial on his last called number, as he sank down onto the sofa. His legs were trembling with his anger, and Killian wasn’t sure he’d be able to support himself for much longer.

He knew the time difference between the two coasts would more than likely mean she was sleeping, but Emma answered his call anyway, with a slightly groggy, “Killian? Is everything okay?”

The sound of her voice was like a soothing balm to his emotions, and Killian found his hands unclenching, and his body relaxing, without conscious thought. “I think I just did something really stupid,” he explained, as he allowed silent tears to fall.

He could hear what he assumed were her bed sheets, rustling over the line, before Emma’s voice returned, this time far more alert. “Tell me what happened.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Thanks for reading and all of your wonderful comments and messages on this one.**


	10. Chapter 9

As filming for the season drew to a close, Killian wasn’t surprised when Ashley announced that she had decided not to renew her contract with the network for a second year. She had stated that she felt procedural shows were not for her, and that she wished the entire cast and crew the very best of luck for the future, but Killian couldn’t help but worry that he was the real reason she had thrown in the towel.

After his outburst with the Instagram video, he had called Emma for advice on what to do. She had assured him that he was well within his rights to be upset about the violation of his privacy, but that he should probably explain to the poor girl that most of his anger was misplaced, and instead, should have been directed at his lying, cheating wife. She’d also ordered him a bunch of flowers, made up of predominantly purple hyacinths, to offer to Ashley, along with his apology. Because Killian knew absolutely nothing about floral arrangements, and Emma was adamant that large bouquets of roses were not the answer to everything, as he believed.

Ashley had accepted his apology with grace, and had offered up one of her own that rang with sincerity. But things between the two of them had never truly returned to normal. And given that their relationship had never been easy to begin with, the new normal was just downright awkward.

“Have you thought about maybe moving on yourself?” Emma asked cautiously that evening, as he relayed Ashley’s news to her. “You’re much better than this show, Killian.”

“I’ve thought about it,” he admitted cautiously. “I’m just… Do you remember what it was like before the show? The crappy jobs to make ends meet until we were noticed? The constant worry about how to afford food for the next week?” Emma hummed her agreement and Killian added, “I’m not eager to go back to unemployment.”

“You have millions of dollars in the bank,” she chided. “Unemployment’s not so scary when you do.”

“Kinda is when your wife’s trying to take half of it,” he sighed.

“Fuck her,” Emma exploded. “She’s already gotten _far_ more out of this than she deserves, Killian. Ignore her. You signed your papers. She’ll sign hers when she realizes she’s not getting anything else out of you. If you let her keep doing this to you, you’re never gonna be able to move on.”

“You know, I don’t remember asking for your opinion on that,” he snapped back, his temper rising once more. Killian hated himself for it the moment the words had left his mouth. Emma was the only person he had left to turn to, in his life. He didn’t want this misplaced anger to drive her away too.

“Well, that’s tough shit,” she told him. “You might not _want_ my opinions, but you’re gonna get them. You’re my best friend. She’s hurting you, Killian, and it’s killing me to see her doing this to you. You don’t deserve that. So, whether you wanna hear it or not, I’m gonna give it to you straight, because someone in your life has to.”

There was silence over the line for the longest of moments, as Killian tried to find the words he needed to apologize to his friend. But, Emma didn’t need them. She already knew how sorry he was. His silence spoke volumes.

“So, I’ve been thinking,” she began softly, her own way of letting him know that all was forgiven, “How about we adopt a new couldn’t-give-a-fuck attitude with regards to your divorce, and you join me for my next premier?”

“You what now?” Killian asked, confused by the sudden change in direction the conversation had taken.

“That indie flick I filmed a few months back is premiering at Tribeca in a couple of weeks. I’ve been invited to attend the premier, so I was thinking that maybe, as you’ll be wrapped by then, you’d like to join me? I know I’ll enjoy the festival a lot more with you there to keep me company. And it’s excellent for networking in the industry.”

A large part of Killian wanted to refuse the offer. As Ashley had pointed out, a huge chunk of his fan base already believed that he and Emma were intimate, and he knew that if they started appearing at events as each other’s dates, they would only add fuel to that fire of rumors. He also knew that his wife wouldn’t be terribly happy about seeing him out on the arm of another woman either, even if she’d never deemed Emma a risk to their relationship while they’d been married. But, Emma was right. It was time for him to stop living in fear of his soon-to-be-ex-wife’s demands, and to start enjoying life once again.

The only way Killian could ever imagine that happening, was with Emma at his side.

“Okay,” he agreed softly. “I can do that.”

“Yeah?” she asked.

The disbelief in her tone made Killian’s heart ache a little. He hated that she had been truly expecting him to turn her down. They used to spend plenty of time together when Emma lived in LA, and he missed that side of their friendship. After she’d left the show, Emma had been kept busy with work all around the globe, for various different projects. She would travel to Africa one month, as part of the charity work she was always so passionate about, to report back on how the fundraising money was being spent, and to encourage others to continue donating. The next month would be spent in England, in theatre, working on various different projects before she would fly back home, to film small roles for movies, or guest spots for the show. There hadn’t been much time for more than a quick chat over coffee, between flights across the world.

Now that she seemed to be back in the country for the foreseeable future, Killian made a promise to himself to spend as much time with his best friend as he possibly could, before she became a huge movie star, who was required to fly all over the world, for work.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “I haven’t seen your new place since you moved back to New York. I’m not gonna pass up that opportunity to critique _your_  decorating skills.”

Emma’s laugh rang out over the other end of the line, a beautiful sound in Killian’s otherwise ugly life. “Well, it’s nowhere near as big, or as nice, as your place,” she told him. “And I don’t have a pool. But, you’ll always be able to call this place home, should you need to.”

Killian softened at her words, endlessly grateful to have someone as kind and loving as Emma in his life. “Thanks, Love. You know that the same goes for this place and you, right?” Emma hummed her agreement and for a moment, a comfortable silence descended over their lines once more. Until Killian added, “Probably best not to tell Milah that, though. She might try and take half of your apartment in the divorce.”

Emma’s snort of laughter was wholly unladylike, but perfectly _Emma_.


	11. Chapter 10

Killian struggled to keep his mind on the job, for his last day on set that season. He had opted to skip the wrap party that weekend, in favor of flying out early to New York, so he would have more time with Emma. And, as the clock ticked ever closer to his departure time, his mind grew more and more distant.

In hindsight, he realized that he probably would have finished earlier, if he’d thrown his full focus at the final few scenes he had to shoot. But, the more he thought about it, the more he believed that to have been impossible. He was simply too excited to spend time with his best friend once more, to focus.

The moment the last cut was called, and the crew began celebrating another season well done, was the moment he began itching to get out of the studio.

“It was a pleasure working with you this year,” Ashley told him, as she turned to face him for the very last time, that afternoon.

“You too. I wish you all the best for the future. Do you have anything else lined up?” he asked politely. A part of him really couldn’t care less, but Killian didn’t want to see the girl fail. She might have had a lot to learn about the industry, but she was good at her job. Ashley deserved to find a role that suited her better, just as he had.

“A couple of auditions next week for pilots. Fingers crossed, hey?”

“Let me know how they go?” He pulled her in for a brief hug, for what might have been the very first time since Ashley had joined the cast, before he excused himself to head back to his trailer. As he went, Killian called out his thanks and goodbyes to the usual crew members that he knew by name. The instant he locked his door behind him was the moment he released a heavy sigh, that he hadn’t known he had been holding in all day.

He showered quickly, changing into comfortable clothing for the flight to the East Coast, before making his exit from set as quickly and quietly as he could. Killian knew that if he stuck around for too long, the crew would rope him into joining them for a beer at their favorite bar, close to the studio, and he’d end up missing his flight. While Emma wouldn’t be mad at him for doing so, he knew he’d be angry at himself if he ended up letting her down.

He couldn’t even bring himself to care that he had arrived at the airport almost an hour early. Instead, he simply hunkered down with a book he’d been meaning to read all year, in one of the small restaurants on site, as he waited to be called for boarding.

While it had only been a few months since Emma had filmed her own guest spot for that season, it had seemed like years since the two of them had last seen each other, and he couldn’t wait to reunite with her again. Killian hadn’t realized just how lonely he was, stuck out in Los Angeles, without his usual friends and family around him, until Emma had come and gone once more.

Before her, the silence and emptiness of his home had seemed normal, and Killian hadn’t given it much thought. But, now that he knew what it was like to have that love and life breathed back into his lonely existence, Killian would do anything in his power to experience it as often as he possibly could.

Milah had taken so much from him, with their split. He’d given her their car, in an attempt to get her out of his life as quickly as possible; and then their home, when he’d realized it was impossible for him to continue living in it, after her betrayal. When their friends had started making it clear they were uncomfortable with picking sides, Killian had essentially given them to his wife, too. She had begged him not to tell them what she’d done, and he’d stupidly agreed, his love for her still triumphing over the heartbreak and anger of what she’d done, in that moment.

But now, Killian was starting to regret that decision more than any other he’d made, in the last three years. He was truly alone, for the first time since he’d left Ireland in the hopes of becoming an actor, all those years ago.

Thankfully, the one person who meant the most to him was still in his corner. And, if it ever came down to a choice, Killian knew he’d have given Milah everything all over again, if it meant keeping Emma in his life.

(Not that she would have put him into a position to make that choice to begin with).

And that was why he’d agreed to attend Tribeca Film Festival, with his friend.

Killian’s outburst at Ashley had woken him up. With a little help from Emma, he had quickly realized that all of the anger and hurt he’d kept locked inside of him, for the last three years, had not been healthy. He was fed up of letting Milah _take_ from the life he’d worked hard to build for himself.

So, Killian had made a promise to himself.

A promise not to allow his soon-to-be ex-wife to control his life, any longer.

* * *

Emma had never really been one of those anally clean kinds of people. While she liked her home to remain tidy, she wasn’t the sort of person who went around it every day with a duster, making sure there wasn’t a spec of dirt in sight.

But, when she woke that morning, it was with the sudden urge to clean her entire apartment, in preparation for Killian’s arrival. She knew that her best friend felt more relaxed in a clean environment, and Emma wanted Killian to rest in her home. So, she had scrubbed, dusted, polished, washed, wiped, and vacuumed every surface in the apartment, before she decided to strip off both beds, and make them up once more, with fresh linens.

Unfortunately, even with as thorough as she had been, that only managed to pass two hours of her day. Emma sighed as she flopped down onto the sofa, wondering what to do next. While she had the entire morning free, her agent had scheduled a dinner meeting for her at the exact time Killian’s plane was due to land, and no matter how hard she had tried, Emma hadn’t been able to reschedule it. Thankfully, Killian was quite possibly the most understanding and supportive person in her life. He had assured her that he would be fine settling himself in, and watching Netflix, until she arrived back home for the evening.

Emma’s next task for the day was to shower, and head out to do some grocery shopping. While she and Killian shared similar tastes in most aspects of their life, there were certain home comforts that she knew her best friend missed, and found hard to source, that Emma wanted to try and pick up for him.

When she had first returned to the city, it had taken her less than a week to find a few hidden gems, that stocked a lot of the products Killian had often reminisced over. Those were first on her shopping list that morning, as she headed out to stock her cupboards with everything the two of them would need for his visit.

Even though she couldn’t be there to physically welcome Killian to the city, Emma wanted him to know that she truly meant what she had said to him, on the phone, the night he had accepted her offer to visit. Her apartment on the East Coast would always be a place Killian could call home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Thanks for reading and all of your lovely comments on this piece.**
> 
> **As an FYI - the next chapter is one of the very first I wrote for this story.**


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I apologise in advance for any mistakes in this one. I couldn't stop tinkering with it.**

When Killian’s plane finally touched down in New York, he was buzzing with excitement to get back to Emma. He knew that she was busy attending an important dinner meeting her agent had arranged for her, but that didn’t bother him one bit. Her career was about to take off in a big way, so he knew that these kinds of networking events were important for her to attend. He would happily let himself into her apartment, unpack, and set himself up with a new Netflix binge, while she was doing her thing.

When he finally pushed open the door to her place, Killian was surprised to find himself struck with an overwhelming sense of home. Emma’s apartment was such a huge reflection of her own personality. It was bright and colorful, with little touches all around that showed her likes and interests.

Killian dropped his bag to the wall just inside the door, as he took in the array of pictures that covered her hallway. Many of the images featured himself, and had been taken in the almost-decade long friendship they had shared. Each one had been positioned perfectly in bold and unusual frames, that didn’t match at all, yet seemed absolutely perfect for Emma’s home.

She had more pictures on windowsills, shelves, and on the rest of the walls of her home. Killian chuckled a little as he realized the black and white prints in her kitchen were shots he had taken when they’d been in Monte Carlo a few years back, for the annual Television festival it hosted. It looked like Emma had chosen a few of her favorite images, added a black and white filter to them, and had used them as her feature for the room.

He’d been completed captivated by the different sights they had been blessed to see that week, so naturally, he’d taken far too many pictures of them. Emma had surprised him with a digital camera the second day of their trip, after he’d complained about filling the memory on his phone so quickly. Killian had loved being able to experiment with all the different features it had to offer, and at one point, Emma had joked that if his acting career ever failed, he should consider taking up photography instead. But, when they’d returned to LA, Milah hadn’t been too impressed with his newfound hobby, and Killian had ended up placing the camera into a draw in his desk (at her insistence), and had completely forgotten about it.

As he stood in Emma’s home, for the first time in years, he wished he’d thought to bring the camera with him to New York. He knew that Emma would never discourage him from following his passions, even if she thought they were ridiculous, as Milah had done that day, so many years ago.

As he continued his way through the apartment, Killian found small trinkets from Emma’s various different trips around the world. Some of the statues he recognized from her previous home in Los Angeles, and some were clearly much newer, from her more recent excursions. He knew his best friend well enough to know that each one would have a fascinating story behind its purchase, and he couldn’t wait to hear why she’d picked the ones she had.

Emma had left a small note for him on the kitchen counter, welcoming him to the Big Apple, and inviting him to make himself comfortable in the spare bedroom. She’d told him to go ahead and explore his new home for the next few days, and to help himself to anything he needed in the kitchen. So, Killian wasn’t surprised to pull open the fridge to find it stocked with some of his favorite brands of soft drinks and beers, or to find the best cuts of meat waiting for cooking, in the perfect sizes for the two of them to share. Emma had always been the better cook in their friendship, and it looked like she was planning to spoil him while he was staying.

It didn’t take him long to find the bedroom Emma had made up for him. Killian quickly unpacked his belongings, hanging up the suit he’d brought with him for the premier, in the small closet the room had, before he switched his shirts and jeans to the set of drawers in the corner. There were yet more pictures and knickknacks in the room, most of which featured either himself, or trinkets from outings the two of them had been on together, over the last decade. He smiled fondly as he picked up a goofy shot of himself with Emma, pulling faces for the camera, at what appeared to be a wrap party, a few years back.

He hadn’t even thought about framing some of the thousands of pictures the two of them had taken together, for his own home. While Milah had often framed plenty in their old place, they were all either of family members, or of the two of them together. There were never any of Killian with his friends, and certainly never any that featured Emma. But, now that he was in her home, he knew it was something he needed to do. There was no way he would be able to sulk around his house with those kinds of memories hanging on his walls, reminding him of just how lucky he had been in his lifetime. Killian sat the picture back down gently, offering it one last smile, before he decided to investigate the rest of his best friend’s apartment.

There was a large bathroom at the very end of the hall, that looked like it was rarely used. Killian’s heart warmed when he realized that Emma had set a fresh toothbrush, and his preferred brands of toothpaste and mouthwash, on the counter ready for his stay.

Opposite his own room was a small office, that he’d seen plenty of times before, when he’d Skyped with Emma. What he hadn’t noticed during those calls, were the many pictures she had framed behind her desk, on the wall. As Killian took the time to look over each one, he quickly realized that his best friend had framed one of each of the official portraits they had taken together, at every official event they had been required to attend by the network. Buried in the middle was even one that he had defaced, when slightly buzzed during an autograph session. He had signed the picture at Emma’s urging, with a much dirtier inscription than what he usually wrote for his fans.

Killian hadn’t ever expected her to keep the autograph, let alone frame it.

The more he explored of Emma’s apartment, the more he was starting to realize that he hadn’t truly known just how sentimental his friend was, until he’d seen the inside of her new home.

He dropped down into the plush looking leather chair behind her desk, and allowed himself a moment to imagine Emma working away at it, when she had some free time. There were scribbles on a note pad to his left, that made absolutely no sense to him, and a few funky looking pens in a cup beside her monitor, no doubt gifted to Emma by her nephew.

A few scripts were piled up on the bookcase to his left, so Killian took a moment to pull them out and thumb through each one. It didn’t surprise him at all to see the Spielberg script on top, but the small neon-pink Post-it stuck to it, made him pause. Emma had written only ten word on to it, but those ten words conveyed just how wonderful of a friend she truly was.

_Remember to ask Spielberg to sign a copy for Killian._

He slipped the script over to one side, once again amazed at her generosity, as he looked through the one below it.

It only took him a moment to find the scenes Emma had highlighted inside of it, and even less time to recall the part she had told him about. Her next project, before the Spielberg movie, was another small role - this time, in a DC adaptation. Killian continued thumbing through, reading the parts intended for Emma, before he slid it aside, to read in full at a later date. He was a little bit of a nerd himself, and he knew the character Emma had been asked to play. It was just a shame the script didn’t offer her a larger focus, because he had no doubts that his best friend would kill that role.

Underneath that was a slightly more dog-eared script, that Killian quickly recognized as his very first episode with the show. He laughed as he flicked through the pages, reading Emma’s small notes on how to interact with the ‘new guy’, and all of the odd quirks he had brought to the role, that she would need to play off. Emma’s notes might have been detailed and thorough, but it hadn’t taken the two of them long to settle into an easy routine. One that allowed them both to bounce off each other’s energy on set. It was something that Killian hadn’t managed to find since Emma had left the show.

And he was starting to wonder if he ever would ever find it again.

The final script in the pile wasn’t familiar to him at all. He racked his brain, trying to think of every role Emma had mentioned to him in recent months, but came up blank.

When his eyes finally landed on the small words printed just under the much larger title, his mind helpfully supplied him with a hazy recollection of a drunken conversation in his own home, not so long ago.

_“Absent without Leave”_

_Written by_

_Emma Swan._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **The very last scene here, in Emma's office, was one of the first ones I got down for this story. It may seem like a small moment, but I'm hoping you'll understand why in a few weeks' time.**
> 
> **Thanks for reading.**


	13. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry for the lateness of this update. I was tinkering, so I apologise for any mistakes.**

The moment Killian heard the front door open, he shut off the TV to make his way through to the hall.

“Evening,” he greeted softly, as he watched his best friend kick off her heels, while she half-stumbled down the room. “Too much wine?”

“No. These fucking shoes are like some kind of medieval torture device,” she chuckled, before she finally made her way over to him, and threw herself into his arms. “I’m so glad you made it.”

Killian held her for a moment, just content to soak up everything about Emma that he’d missed since she had been gone. When he finally pulled back, it was to ask, “Did the four messages and accompanying pictures not suggest that?”

“Pictures? I missed pictures?” she pouted, as the two of them made their way through the apartment, for Emma to drop down heavily onto her sofa. “I turned my phone off for dinner so I wouldn’t get distracted.” She reached for the small clutch she had taken with her, and pulled out the device from inside, to turn it back on.

“Yep. I sent one of me at the airport, before I took off. One at baggage claim. One from inside the car, on the way here. And then one of me… spread across your bed.”

Emma swallowed heavily as her eyes snapped up to meet Killian’s. Her phone was taking it’s time to load, so she couldn’t access those pictures just yet. Instead, she asked as evenly as she could, “You were on my bed?”

“Yeah.” Killian brought his hand up to scratch nervously behind his right ear, as he explained, “You left the door open and told me to explore. I thought it would be funny. Looking back now, it seems a little creepy. Sorry.”

“It’s fine. I’ve got nothing to hide,” she assured him, as her phone finally finished starting up, and his messages began flashing across her screen. “Just as long as you stayed out of my underwear draw.” She sent a teasing wink in his direction, before pulling up the first selfie he’d sent. Killian looked utterly adorable at the airport, in a huge cap and sunglasses, so he wouldn’t draw unwanted attention to himself.

“Why? What’s in your underwear draw?” A wicked grin flashed across his face, and before Emma could move, he’d sprung up from the sofa and was running across the room.

“Don’t you fucking dare, Jones,” she called after him, the messages forgotten as she hauled herself to her feet, to chase after him.

* * *

“So… how was the meeting?” he asked, as he poured them both a large glass of wine. Emma had thwarted his attempts to sneak into her room with some carefully placed tickles, before she’d sent him to the kitchen for refreshments. While he was busy, she changed out of the dress she had been wearing, and into a pair of lounge pants and a tank top.

“Boring. The director I met with wanted me for a role he was casting, but I don’t think the film is for me. He was a little too sleazy for my liking.”

“Sleazy? In what way? He didn’t touch you, did he?” Killian’s protective streak didn’t often rear its head, but when it did, Emma always marveled at the way he could go from sweet and loving, to fierce and furious, in seconds.

“No, nothing like that,” she assured him. “He just liked to stare at my breasts when he thought I wasn’t looking.”

Killian relaxed a little when he heard that the sleaze-ball hadn’t touched his best friend, but he still wasn’t happy that Emma had left the dinner feeling the way she had. “Remind me again who this director was?”

“You know, you’re not as cool as you think you are,” she warned, having guessed immediately where his mind had gone. “Don’t worry. I’m a big girl. I can take care of myself. I’ll be sure to let my agent know what I thought of him, and that _I_ certainly won’t be working with him in any capacity, in the future.”

“Good.”

“So, other than messing up my bed, what have you been doing since you got here?” she asked.

“I um… I’ve been doing some light reading.” Killian reached behind himself to grab the scripts that he’d left on the small end table, when he’d finished reading them over. He hadn’t been sure how Emma would take him reading her original piece, but after his second time through, he knew he had to speak with her about it. “You know, this one has spin-off written all over it, right?” he teased, as he dropped the DC script between the two of them.

“That’s sort of why I took the role,” she chuckled. “My agent thought that if the audience connected with my character enough, DC might spin it off. Like they have so many of their other heroes.” Emma had also taken the role because she knew her best friend was a huge nerd, with a collection of DC comics that he liked to hide in his trailer at work, (as his ex-wife had found them childish). She knew that Killian would be so proud of her for landing the role, and she’d selfishly hoped that he’d feel confident enough to attend the premier with her, so she wasn’t forced to travel alone again.

“Then I got really sucked into this one,” he continued, as he dropped the next script into the small space between the two of them.

“Where did you get that?” Emma demanded, as she snatched it off the sofa.

“It was in the pile with the rest of the scripts in your office.” Killian waited for a moment to see if Emma would say anything else, and when she didn’t, he spoke once more. “Ems, this is _really_ good.”

“You’re just saying that because you’re my best friend,” she interrupted.

“No, I’m saying it because it’s true,” he countered. “I mean sure, if it were awful, I’d tell you it had some good points to build on, and how you could work to make it better, whilst doing my best not to offend you. But it’s not. This is _really_ good stuff. You have to pitch this to a studio, Emma.”

“I’m not pitching it,” she told him, her tone making it clear that the issue wasn’t up for discussion.

But there was no way Killian was going to let the subject drop.

“Ems, you’re sitting on a gold mine. I know you’re scared, and rejection in this industry is never easy. But that script is fantastic. I love you to bits and you know I support everything you do in life, but even I was blown away by it. I was expecting good and you delivered incredible. You _have_ to pitch that piece. If you don’t, you’re always going to regret not knowing what could have come of it.”

“I have a big role coming up,” she snapped back. “I don’t have time to pitch scripts that could lead nowhere. I mean, what if this makes me a laughing stock in the industry? Who’s gonna wanna hire me if they see this and think it’s worse than some high school kid could produce?”

Killian shifted himself over the sofa, and reached out to tilt Emma’s head up from where she’d been staring at her lap, to make her eyes meet his. “If you trust me,” he told her sincerely, “Then you’ll believe me when I tell you that this is the best screenplay I have _ever_ been privileged to read. I know some of my past features haven’t exactly ranked with yours, but if they can be turned into movies that people _actually_ pay to see, then there’s no way you have to worry about being laughed out of a studio with this. Because _I_ would pay to see this movie, over and over again.”

When Emma had sat down to write the story, she’d told herself she was doing it for herself. The plot had been on her mind for the longest time, based on a few real-life stories she’d read and seen in the media. She’d confessed to Killian, one evening, that she couldn’t stop thinking about it, and he’d told her the best way to rectify that was to put it down on paper. But once Emma had typed the words ‘THE END’ on her final page, she’d had a sudden urge to print the document. She wanted something to show for her time, and this way, the story wouldn’t live forever, trapped inside of some computer. Instead, she could display it on her bookcase. Because even if nobody else ever read it, Emma was proud of what she’d managed to achieve.

But now that Killian had read it too, and seemed to genuinely enjoy it, suddenly the idea of the script only living on her bookshelf for the rest of her life, didn’t seem as appealing as it once had before.

Emma leaned in to brush a sweet kiss to Killian’s cheek. “You’re a good friend, Jones. Anyone ever tell you that before?”

“Only you,” he chuckled. “But you’re all I need.”


	14. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I wanted to post this as part of my birthday celebrations yesterday, but unfortunately, I lost my battle with sleep before I could. Sorry I missed you guys out.**

“Ugh, I can’t do it,” she groaned. “You’ll have to go on without me.”

“Come on, Emma,” Killian encouraged, “You’re not _that_ old, remember?”

Emma shot her friend a dirty look at the way he’d thrown her words back at her, from earlier that morning, but the sweat running down from her temples softened the blow. “You know that if I had the energy to lift my hand, you’d be getting a slap for that, right?”

The couple just behind her on the staircase chuckled a little at her words, as Killian turned around to make his way back down to where his best friend was stood. Emma was clutching onto the railing, looking like it was the only thing helping keep her upright.

“Get on,” he told her, turning his back towards her.

“Excuse me?”

“Get on,” he repeated, dropping down to a crouch before her. “You’re holding up the line, Swan. Hop on and I’ll carry you the rest of the way up.”

“You can’t carry me the rest of the way up,” she protested. “We still have hundreds of steps to go. I’m too heavy.”

“You’re not heavy,” Killian scoffed. “And I’m well aware that we still have hundreds of steps left to go. If you remember rightly, that was my argument as to why this did not constitute a relaxing day, this morning. Now… What do you want me to do? Leave you here and come back for you in a few hours, or carry you up? Stop moaning and climb on, before one of the Park Rangers comes back to see what’s going on.”

Emma looked like she still wasn’t happy with the solution being offered to her, but she jumped onto Killian back with ease, wrapping her arms around his neck, as he held her thighs in a firm grip.

“You know you’re probably gonna do your back in,” she warned gently.

“Trust me, Swan. You’re not the heaviest thing I’ve ever carried before,” he assured her, as he continued the trek up the many steps they had left, to get to their goal. “Besides, I’ve been working out recently,” he confessed quietly. “It helps with my anger.”

“That’s good,” Emma praised. “It’s good that you have an outlet for it. Have you tried speaking with a therapist?” She knew that while Killian was now directing his anger at the right target, he had bottled it up for so long that she couldn’t help but think speaking with a professional might help him to let go of it, once and for all.

“Can we maybe discuss this another time?” he asked. “No offense, but I just… I don’t want to ruin the day by talking about my issues.”

Emma said nothing more on the subject. Instead, she leaned forward to drop her head down to his shoulder, to watch as Killian made the rest of their climb for the two of them.

When they finally made it to the top, the Park Ranger didn’t look too happy to see Emma being carried up by her best friend, but he also didn’t voice his opinion on the subject. If Killian hadn’t offered to carry her the rest of the way, she’d have probably blocked the narrow staircase completely, making it impossible for anyone else to pass her. So, he’d really been doing the best thing for everyone involved.

When he had dropped Emma back down to her feet, Killian detoured over to the nearest observation window, pulling his phone out of his pocket as he went. “Holy shit,” he exclaimed. “Are you seeing this?”

“I’m right beside you,” she chuckled, as she watched her friend take a moment to absorb the breathtaking views they were being offered of New York City, and the waters of the Upper New York Bay. When he’d gotten his fill of the sights, Killian pulled up the camera app on his phone, to begin framing and taking shots all around him.

“Remind me to dig my camera out when I get back home,” he told Emma, as she watched him take picture after picture, to remember their trip by.

“I will do,” she assured him.

Emma wasn’t stupid. As much as Killian had played off his sudden disinterest in photography, on their return from Monte Carlo all those years before, he’d once let slip what Milah had said about his new hobby. It hadn’t taken much to work out that her best friend’s wife was the reason her gift hadn’t seen the light of day since then. Emma felt oddly smug overly the knowledge that now Milah was gone, Killian was considering using it once more.

With a small squeeze to his arm, Emma moved away from her friend’s side to have a good look out of each of the observations windows around the platform, so she could take in the views being offered herself. She was nowhere near as talented as Killian was with a camera. But she wanted a few of her own pictures to remember the day by. While the last one hundred steps of the climb had been brutal, the previous three hundred had been full of easy banter and jokes, as Killian managed to charm everyone else in their viewing party. The others didn’t seem to recognize either of them, or if they had, they were respectful enough not to say anything. So, Emma and Killian had enjoyed spending their day as tourists, blending in as they first explored Ellis Island, and the National Museum of Immigration, before the ferry continued on to Liberty Island.

While Killian hadn’t sounded overly enthusiastic about Emma’s plans that morning, when she had first announced them, he had thrown himself into the tours. Emma had watched as he stopped to take pictures at every possible occasion, while he soaked up all of the information that the National Park Rangers had provided them with. The moment she had revealed that she had booked the two of them Crown tickets for the Statue, Killian hadn’t been able to contain his excitement.

“I take it all back,” he mumbled, as he wrapped his arms around her from behind, to prop his chin on her shoulder. Emma hadn’t heard him approaching, so she had jumped a little at the first contact, but had soon relaxed back into the familiar warmth her friend always radiated. “This was a brilliant way to spend our day. Thanks for planning it, Ems.”

“I will accept your apologies in the form of chocolate,” she chuckled, as she allowed herself to lean back into his embrace.

For a moment, neither of them said anything. Instead, they stood in silence, allowing the comfort they always provided each other with to wash over their aching muscles, as their eyes continued to take in the incredible views that were being offered to them, on that clear April morning.

“You know, we should probably take some pictures of ourselves, while we’re up here,” she suggested. “Liam’s never gonna believe you were here without photographic evidence to back up your claims.”

Killian snorted out a laugh at how well his friend knew his brother, before he pulled back to attempt to work out how to go about taking some pictures. There wasn’t an awful lot of space inside the crown, which would make taking selfies difficult, given his height.

“Would you like me to do that for you?” A sweet, older lady asked. Killian recognized her as one half of the couple who had been behind Emma, for the duration of their climb.

“Thank you so much.” Emma held out her phone for the other woman to take, before allowing Killian to pull her back into his arms. He positioned the two of them just right, so they would have a good view of the city behind them, in their shots.

The older woman took a few different pictures, before she handed the phone back to Emma. “You and your husband make a lovely couple,” she praised, as she did.

“Oh um… we’re not married,” Emma hurried to correct her, as she turned around to watch Killian’s face flame bright red, while he scratched nervously behind his ear. “He’s my best friend.”

“Well… then you’re both incredibly lucky to have each other,” the woman offered, before her own husband called her back to his side, to look at something he’d spotted from his own observation window.

Emma turned back to face her friend, as she flicked through the images now stored on the small device. “You know, if we had a dollar for every person who said that, we’d be rich,” she teased gently.

“We’re already rich,” Killian pointed out, as he dropped his chin back down to her shoulder, to look at the pictures that had been taken of them. “Maybe we should consider donating a dollar to charity for every time it’s mentioned, from now on?”

“That would be one hell of a story to tell in interviews,” Emma giggled.


	15. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry this one didn't go up yesterday. I wasn't feeling very well.**

Killian flexed the fingers in his left hand, hoping it would help to stimulate the blood flow to them, and shake off the pins and needles he could feel creeping in. Emma had fallen asleep on his shoulder not long after the two of them had polished off the burgers they had brought home with them. And he couldn’t bring himself to wake her up.

The walk back down the statue had been nowhere near as easy as the one up it, and he could see his friend was struggling with every step they took. But Emma had pushed herself on, driven by the promise of a long hot bath when she got home, and her most comfortable pajamas.

She had fallen asleep before she could run herself a bath or change into those pajamas, and with every hour that passed, she had snuggled herself into Killian’s embrace just that little bit further.

As she slept, Killian had sent himself the pictures of the two of them at the top of the statue, and had forwarded them on to their families. Like he had expected, Liam had shown the images to his two nephews, Adrian and Alfie, who had wanted to talk to their uncle immediately. Killian had promised to call the boys the next day, not wanting to explain that he was presently buried under their Aunt Emma, as she slept half on him, and half on the sofa. His mother and father had also loved seeing the pictures. They had asked him to pass along their love to Emma, with his mother reminding him to bring her over to Ireland for a visit again soon.

Emma’s parents had similarly enjoyed seeing the images of the two of them together, enjoying their day. Mary-Margret had remarked on just how well Killian looked, before inviting him to join the family later that year, for the Fourth of July celebrations they were hosting. Killian suspected that she was worried he would end up spending the holidays alone, as a result of his divorce, but that hadn’t stopped him from accepting her offer. He had always enjoyed spending time with the Nolans, and often considered Emma’s younger brother as one of his only remaining true friends, since separating from his wife.

From the moment he had first met Emma, her family had become a second family to him. The Nolans were always providing him with a place to visit and stay, should he ever need to get away. And they had always happily embraced his position in Emma’s life, as her best friend. Killian knew that Emma felt the same way about his own family. During her travels to Europe, she would often set aside a day to visit with the Joneses, before carrying on to her next destination.

After replying to everyone’s messages, Killian flicked out of his messaging app and pulled up the pictures from their day once more. He had been surprised by just how much he had enjoyed it, so he really shouldn’t have been shocked by the current urge that was flooding his system.

Killian had never been the type of celebrity to flaunt his personal life, before. In fact, he had firmly believed that his personal and professional lives should remain separated, as much as possible. So, while he would post the occasional message on Mother’s Day, or for other public holidays, it wasn’t a frequent occurrence.

Under the advice of his management team, he had eventually published a statement regarding his divorce, when he had made the official filing. But since then, Killian had chosen to keep a low profile online. He always retweeted the show’s own account, promoting every up and coming episode, but he had posted no new and original content himself.

However, that evening, as Emma slept peacefully curled into his chest, Killian sat and stared down at his phone, and the tweet he had found himself composing.

He still wasn’t the kind of celebrity that felt comfortable sharing every detail of his personal life. He wasn’t a Kardashian. But he did want to share some of the images of his day with everyone else. Because, for the first time since he’d carefully composed that statement about his divorce, Killian was truly happy, and he wanted to share that feeling with the rest of the world.

Milah wouldn’t be pleased to see him flaunting his friendship with Emma, while they were still negotiating the terms of their divorce. While she’d always been supportive of the friendship they shared, Killian had often refrained from making it too public, out of respect for his wife. He knew there were fans who had thought he and Emma would make a much better couple, and he hadn’t wanted to disrespect the woman he loved in such a way.

But Milah had disrespected him the moment she had decided to sleep with someone else, during their marriage. And Killian was determined to move on from the past that had been threatening to pull him under for so long. As he glanced down to Emma’s sleeping form once more, he decided to take the plunge, and hit tweet on his message.

He locked the small device and sat it back down on the arm of the sofa before he could second guess himself.

* * *

When Emma finally woke, every muscle in her body began screaming in protest.

The climb up the Statue of Liberty had seemed like such a good idea, when she had booked the tickets. Emma knew that Killian had never done the tour before, and for as much as she loved the city, she’d never been over to Liberty Island either.

She hadn’t realized just how out of shape she must have been, until that final climb began.

With some difficulty Emma pushed herself up, to take in her surroundings. She had clearly fallen asleep on the sofa, but what surprised her the most was the firm, warm body underneath her own, that was snoring softly into the back cushions.

Emma remembered being sat next to Killian on the sofa as they ate and talked about the best parts of their day. But somehow, in the hours since then, the two of them had both fallen asleep, and drifted down to stretch out across the couch.

She pulled herself out of his arms as gently as she could, hyper aware that her knee had ended up very close to a rather delicate area of Killian’s body, before she stretched out the kinks in her muscles, and hobbled her way through to the bathroom. A hot bath sounded heavenly, but Emma didn’t want to leave Killian for too long, so she settled on a steaming shower instead, allowing the spray of hot water to soothe all of her aches and pains.

When she made her way back into the living room, it was to find Killian still sprawled across the sofa. She took a moment to appreciate just how young and carefree he looked while he slept. Emma hadn’t seen him without those worries in so long. She’d forgotten just how much more beautiful he was, when he was fully relaxed and content.

She allowed herself a moment to run a soothing hand through his hair, before she pressed a kiss to his forehead, grabbed her phone off the coffee table, and took refuge in the small chair she loved to read in.

There were a few messages from her family, and one from her agent too, asking for her to call as soon as she could. But Emma ignored them all in favor of the twitter alert she had from Killian. She knew her friend hated social media, and rarely used his own for anything other than promoting his show. So, she was a little confused about what message he would be tagging her in.

The tweet that lit up her screen, when the notification finally opened, had Emma feeling light and giddy inside. Killian had attached two images to the message. One was of what he had clearly felt was the best view offered that morning, looking out over the open water, to the skyline of New York City in the distance. The second was one of the images the other woman had taken for them. Killian was stood behind Emma, with his arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders as he leaned down to prop his chin on top of her head. The two of them wore bright matching smiles, along with the ridiculous Liberty Crown hats that Emma had insisted on buying for them, before their climb. And just to their left was another angle of that remarkable view.

But it was Killian’s words that Emma loved the most.

_This day was simply too good not to share with you all. Thanks, @EmmaSwan for making me write a bucket list, just so we could cross this one off it. #StatueOfLiberty #NYC #WorthThePain #MyBestFriendIsBetterThanYours_


	16. Chapter 15

“This is truly fascinating,” Killian mumbled, as Emma reached out to slap his hand away.

“I should have known this was a bad idea.”

Her team of stylists had arrived at the apartment an hour before, to help her prepare for the lunch she was attending that afternoon to officially open the film festival. Ever since they had started work on her hair and makeup, Killian had taken great pleasure in watching the entire process unfold.

“Don’t you get enough of this in the makeup chair every week at work?”

“That’s television makeup,” Killian dismissed easily. “This is the fancy stuff. You do realize that you look just as beautiful without all of this as you do with it, right?”

Emma twisted round briefly to make eye contact with her friend, before turning her head back to allow her people to finish perfecting her look. “You’re too sweet, Killian. But trust me, the _before_ look you saw this morning was still me in makeup.”

“I’ve seen you without it, Ems. We used to sit next to each other in a makeup trailer, remember?”

Emma wasn’t sure what else to say in that moment. She was used to Killian paying her compliments, but responding to them had always been awkward. She was so paranoid about giving away her true feelings with her replies, that she often ended up saying something entirely inappropriate.

So instead, she did what she did best, and changed the subject.

* * *

“Are you sure you’re gonna be okay here without me?” Emma checked her small clutch bag one final time to make sure she had everything she would need for the day, before snapping it closed with an air of finality.

“Of course,” he assured her. “You know I live alone, right? My own company is something I’ve gotten very used to these last few years.”

“I don’t like leaving you here,” she argued. “I invited you to my home to spend time with me, and I feel like I’m barely seeing you.”

“Honestly Ems, I’ll be fine. It’s only gonna be a couple of hours and I promised Liam I’d Skype with the boys. That’ll keep me busy for most of that time.”

Emma chuckled at the thought of past video calls she’d witnessed between Killian and his nephews. The boys adored their uncle, so every time he called home, getting him off the line proved to be difficult. He’d held up production on more than one occasion before because he had locked himself in his trailer to talk with his family.

“You can use my computer for that, if you want?” she offered. Killian knew her password for it, just as she knew his passcode to unlock his phone. The two of them had locked themselves out of their own devices on more than one occasion before they had decided to share their details. “Send my love to your parents and tell the boys I say hi?” she asked.

“Of course. Have fun at lunch.”

Emma looked like she wasn’t sure that would be happening, but she said nothing more. Instead she leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek, before heading down to the car that was waiting for her.

Killian made himself a light lunch from all of his favorite ingredients in Emma’s fridge, savoring the peace of the apartment for a moment, before he sent his brother a message to see if everyone was available for a chat.

Liam replied almost instantly, informing him that the kids had been asking all day to speak to their favorite uncle. It only took Killian a few minutes to start up Emma’s computer and then to load her Skype app, before he was settling himself in comfortably, waiting for the call to connect.

“Hi Uncle Killian,” came an uncoordinated and overly-loud greeting, before the video cleared to show two very excited faces grinning back at him.

“Hi boys,” he chuckled. “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long.”

Alfie and Adrian shook their heads while Liam bobbed his in the background, and Killian chuckled once more at his family’s antics. While both of his nephews had been born after he’d left Ireland, in search of his lucky break, they were the one part of home Killian missed most.

Seven-year-old Alfie was the quieter of the two, often preferring to draw pictures or build Lego creations on his own, over the boisterous play his younger brother favored. Adrian had calmed down a lot since he’d begun school. Killian could vividly remember some late-night calls with his brother a few years back. Liam had been worried that Adrian might have some kind of behavioral issues to deal with, because he’d been sent home from nursery early once more for hitting another child. But the more ridged routine that school had provided him with seemed to be exactly what Adrian had needed, and he had flourished in the classroom since his first year began back in September.

“We drew you some pictures while we waited,” Alfie explained, as he held up a sheet of paper for the camera to see. His brother scrambled around for his own, before holding it up next to the one already being showcased.

“Wow. Those look amazing,” Killian praised. “I can’t see all of the details very well from here, so can you tell me what you drew for me?”

“I drewed a dog,” Adrian explained simply. The young boy had been trying to convince his parents to buy him a puppy for his birthday all year, but Liam was adamant that he didn’t need another mouth to feed in the house just yet.

“I can see it now,” Killian lied. “You drew a beautiful dog. Does he have a name?”

Adrian clearly hadn’t picked one out but he cocked his head to the side slightly, his brow rising in thought, before he finally declared, “Gary.”

“Well… I look forward to hanging Gary on my refrigerator door. What did you draw for me, Alfie?”

“You and Auntie Emma,” he explained softly, holding his picture up once more for the small camera to see. Killian had to squint a little to make out all of the details, but eventually he spotted a dark-haired taller man, standing next to a smaller woman with yellow hair. “Mummy said you’re taking her out on a date tomorrow night.”

Liam and Anna’s started declarations of, “Alfie,” rang out clearly over the connection, and Killian laughed a little with it.

“I did _not_ say it was a date,” Anna protested, poking her head into the frame to meet her brother-in-law’s eyes briefly, before they flicked back down to her son.

“You said…” But Alfie didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence as his mother was gently clamping a hand over his mouth, to hiss something into his ear.

Killian’s brow creased in confusion as he wondered what he was missing. There was a moment of chaos on his brother’s end of the line, before Liam’s face finally came back into view. This time he was alone, with the familiar image of his office wall behind him. Which could only mean that Liam had decided to relocate away from his kids for a moment.

“Should I ask?”

“Kids,” he chuckled. “You know what they’re like. How’s things, Brother?”

Killian could tell when Liam was attempting to change the subject, but he wasn’t in the mood for a fight that afternoon. So instead he let the subject drop, in favor of answering his brother’s question. “Going well, thanks. I’ve um… I joined a gym.”

“You? You joined a gym?” Liam scoffed. “Did you lose a bet?”

Killian fiddled a little with the pens on Emma’s desk, not wanting to look his brother in the eye (even if it was through a computer screen) as he admitted, “It’s helping me control my anger.”

“Anger? I didn’t realize things had gotten that bad.”

“Not _that_ bad,” Killian rushed to assure him. “I haven’t hit anybody. But I probably drove Ashley away from signing on for another season of the show. Emma suggested that I should try finding a way to channel that energy into something more productive, to stop any future outbursts from occurring. So… I joined a gym.”

Liam nodded his head in understanding as he processed his brother’s words.

When Killian had first made the announcement that he would be divorcing his wife, after he caught her cheating on him, the Jones family had expected to see more of him. But in reality, the opposite had happened. Killian still called home on a regular basis, and visited a few times every year too. But it was almost like he had forced himself into exile. His wife (who none of them had ever expected to cheat on him) had humiliated him, and it was obvious that it was taking Killian a while to move past the shame of that.

However, since Emma had made her return to America, and with it her return to Killian’s life, the Jones family had seen a marked improvement in Killian’s behavior. His calls and messages came more frequently, and they were much happier in tone than they had previously been. He’d made provisions to return home for visits, having booked his flights and a car along with them so that he couldn’t wiggle out of them closer to the time. And he was finally leaving his house for more than just work.

“So, Tribeca huh?” Liam asked, in an attempt to steer the conversation away from the darkness Killian’s divorce always casted over communications. “Tell me more about that?”

Killian was quick to explain to his brother about what the festival was, and the schedule that it would be following. While he had never been before, he knew that Emma had, and she had often told him about her past experiences during the different activities she had participated in. He also gushed over the movie that was being premiered there, and how proud he was of his best-friend for everything she had achieved. Killian always spoke more freely when the topic of the conversation was Emma, and everybody knew that.

Liam looked up briefly from the screen of his laptop at the slight creaking noise coming from his open doorway, to meet his wife’s eyes. His brother had moved on to talking about the scripts he’d read for Emma’s upcoming projects, and how perfect each role was for her.

Anna’s eyes said everything Liam wasn’t willing to put a voice to.

Killian’s attendance at Emma’s premier might not have been planned as a date, but Anna and Liam were both wondering how much longer it would take for the two of them to make that leap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Thanks again for all of your wonderful feedback on this story.**
> 
> **If you're on Tumblr, and you would like to take part, nominations are currently open for the Once Upon A Time Fandom Choice Awards. They're accepting nominations for fan fiction, fan art and fandom folk. So, go and check those out and get nominating! You can find them at ouatfandomawards.**


	17. Chapter 16

“Did you do something different?” Emma asked, as she looked up from her reflection in the mirror to watch her friend make his approach.

“I showered,” he replied slowly.

“I’m aware of that,” she sighed. “Did you do anything else while you were in there?”

Killian cocked a brow at her playfully and watched as Emma’s cheeks pinked adorably at the innuendo she’d missed. He gave her a few seconds to sweat it out before he finally said, “I trimmed my beard. But that’s about it.” He scrubbed a hand over his chin a little self-consciously, before dropping down into the seat next to her.

After she’d returned from lunch the day before, the two of them had curled up together on the sofa to just relax and gossip. Emma had told Killian about her afternoon while the two of them enjoyed Chinese takeout, and Killian had listened intently before telling Emma about the call home to his family. She had been touched to hear that they had all sent their love and congratulations to her, on landing the Spielberg project. So she really shouldn’t have been surprised to see a large bouquet of flowers arrive at her door that morning.

Her eyes flicked over to the arrangement that now sat in the center of the kitchen island, before she reached out to run her hand softly over her friend’s jawline. “That’s it,” she assured him. “When you trim it back it loses a little of that loveable redness.” Emma chuckled as she watched a blush creep up his chest and neck, to settle in to the tips of his ears.

Killian never could take a compliment.

“You look nice,” he offered instead, changing the subject away from his own appearance.

“Thank you.” Emma’s eyes dropped down to her lap briefly to hide her smile, before she pulled them back up to meet his. “Do you need any help at all this evening?”

“I’m thirty-two years old, I’m pretty sure I know how to dress myself,” he chuckled.

“I didn’t mean that,” she scoffed. “I meant with hair, and makeup, and such.”

“I’ll be fine,” he assured her. “I have no intention of wearing any makeup this evening, and I’ve been styling my own hair since I was a teenager. Focus on you, Sweetheart. It’s your big night, after all. Now… would you like a drink while you’re busy with all of that?”

“Yes please.”

While it was still relatively early, Emma’s team of stylists had arrived at the apartment an hour before, to help her get ready for the premier that evening. She had taken a shower while they were busy setting up in the living room, and Killian had left them to it when he realized he was hindering them more than he was helping. He’d eventually decided to take his own, and tidy up his appearance while he was at it.

Killian had been letting the stubble he usually wore grow out a little more since his separation from Milah. It was almost like he thought the added facial hair would help protect his heart from future attacks. But as he wiped the mirror in the bathroom clear of condensation, he made the decision to trim it all back. This was a big night for Emma, and Killian wanted nothing more than to look his best for her.

When he had finally emerged from the bathroom, it was to find his best friend already sat in front of a lit mirror, wrapped up in a yellow bathrobe, while the same guy from the day before busied himself with styling her hair.

Killian wasn’t sure where the urge came from, but as he stood at the kitchen counter watching as Emma’s hair slowly transformed into one of the crown braids he’d often seen her wear, he found himself pulling out his phone to snap a quick picture, before uploading it to Twitter.

_Watching the magic happen with @EmmaSwan._  
_#Tribeca2017 #SoProudOfHer #ThatBraidLooksPainful_

* * *

Killian excused himself to start getting dressed when Emma’s hairstylist began packing away his stuff, so that her makeup artist could get to work. He knew the process wouldn’t take long to complete, and the last thing he wanted to do was hold up the evening because he’d been too hypnotized by watching some guy braid his best friend’s hair, to bother getting himself dressed.

Thankfully, it took him nowhere near as long as it would take Emma to get ready. Killian had opted to style his hair a little differently that evening. He parted it just over his left eye, and swept the hair over to one side, as opposed to his usual slightly-messy upward sweep. He knew all too well how the industry worked by now. Every little thing about their appearances that evening would be critiqued. And as a result of that, Killian had found himself wanting to look his best for his friend, on a night that meant so much to her.

When he was finally happy with his hair, he returned to the room he’d been calling his own for the past few days, to pull out the black pinstriped suit he’d bought for the occasion. Since he’d started hitting the gym, all of his old ones had become a little too tight around his shoulders. Killian hadn’t wanted to risk looking stupid in a suit that was clearly too small for him, so he had made sure to visit his favorite menswear designer back in Los Angeles, to have the one he was currently stepping into custom made for the night.

A crisp white dress shirt was tucked in to black pinstripe trousers, which were held in place by a tan, leather belt. Emma had assured him that the festival wasn’t as fancy as award shows were, so Killian had opted to forgo a tie in favor of leaving a few of his top buttons undone. When he was finished shrugging into the suit jacket, he took a moment to tuck a small white handkerchief into his pocket, before heading back out to the living room to wait for Emma. He’d heard her bedroom door close as he was pulling on his shirt, so he assumed that she was busy dressing.

It didn’t take long for the click of Emma’s heels to echo down the hallway, as her voice called out, “Killian, are you almost ready to go?”

He sprung to his feet ready to turn and greet his friend, but found himself freezing as his eyes took in her appearance from head to toe. The outfit she’d picked for the night was a one-shouldered, back and navy-blue dress. The black fabric that formed the top half was artfully ruffled in a way that looked less like it needed a good iron, and more like it had been painstakingly folded to achieve the desired look. There was a thin black band around her waist that added a little shape to the design, before it gave way to a navy-blue skirt that almost shimmered under the lights in the apartment. The skirt of Emma’s dress only fell to the middle of her thighs, pulling Killian gaze down to the long expanse of her legs, before his eyes finally stopped on the pair of black velvet pumps she was wearing.

“Killian?” she called out, when he remained silent for a little too long. Emma’s brow had creased with her concern for him, making him wonder just how long he’d been stood staring at her legs. “Is everything okay?”

“Fine,” he stuttered out. “Absolutely fine. Everything’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I just um… You look beautiful, Ems” he told her. “ _Really_ beautiful.”

Emma blushed a little under his praise as she teased, “Well… you don’t need to sound so shocked about that.”

“Oh I’m not,” he rushed to assure her. “You’ve always been beautiful. I just…” Killian trailed off a little as he screwed his own face up in embarrassment. He was making a complete idiot of himself, and he had no idea why. He’d seen Emma dressed to impress before. Hell, he’d probably seen her in more fancy dresses and gowns over the years than he had his ex-wife.

So why was the sudden sight of his best-friend’s bare legs making his throat dry? Had they always been that long?

“You look stunning,” he finished lamely. “I’m just so proud that I’ll be able to accompany you to this premier tonight.”

Emma’s smile widened a little at her friend’s declaration, as she made her way over to his side to stroke a gentle hand down his arm. “Thank you. To be honest, I couldn’t imagine celebrating this with anyone else,” she told him genuinely. The moment she’d been informed about the premier, Emma’s first thought had been to call Killian and ask him to accompany her to it. There was nobody else in her life that supported her the way he did. He deserved to be there to see everything his encouragement had helped her to achieve.

When her hand slid down to his wrist, Killian caught it in his own to offer her a gentle squeeze of thanks, before finally letting go.

Emma gave him another small smile before making her way round to where a black jacket had been draped over the back of a chair, ready for her use that evening. “Oh… and Killian,” she called over her shoulder, as she picked it up to drape across her arm. “You look great too. The gym’s clearly been good to you.”

   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Emma's look here is based on Jen's look for SDCC in 2012.**
> 
> **Killian's is based on Colin's look for the season 4 screening of Once Upon A Time in 2014.**
> 
> **Thanks for all of your kind words about this story.**


	18. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry this one didn't post last week. I was feeling a little under the weather, and wanted to take a moment away from the fandom to rest up.**

“Are you okay?” Emma asked, as she reached over to take Killian’s hand into her own, to offer it a gentle squeeze.

“Yeah, I’m just excited,” he assured her. “I can’t wait to see this movie.”

“You know we don’t actually have to sit through it, right?”

Killian knew that most people in Hollywood hated watching themselves on screen. To the point that they would often slip out of the back entrance of a theatre during a premier, just to avoid an awkward situation. But Killian wasn’t one of those people, and he knew that Emma wasn’t either. The two of them enjoyed the process of making movies (or episodes of television) far too much for that. They liked seeing how all of the scenes they remembered from longs days of shooting, came together with sections of a script they’d barely even seen, to form a much bigger picture.

There was absolutely no way Killian would miss his chance to sit through the premier of his best friend’s movie.

“Oh I’m staying,” he told her. “You can sneak out early if you’d like, but you’ll need to come back for me in a couple of hours.”

Emma giggled as she let him pull her into his side, to press a kiss to her hair.

When the car rolled to a stop, Killian took a moment just to settle his nerves. It had been a while since he’d attended a movie premier. The last one had been for a film he’d shot years ago, with Milah at his side. And although he wanted nothing more than to support Emma throughout her big night, Killian was well aware that their arrival together would set tongues wagging.

“Are you ready?” she asked gently.

“Absolutely.”

Like the complete gentleman he was, Killian slid out of the car first, ready to extend a hand back to help Emma down. He watched as she slipped the jacket off her shoulders, knowing her assistant James would grab it for her, before she placed her hand into his own to climb out of the vehicle.

They stole a moment of privacy behind the open car door, allowing James to make sure they were both perfectly presentable, before he finally gave them his nod of approval. Killian wound his arm around his best friend’s waist, as he guided her out onto the red carpet that had been laid down for the attending guests.

It had also been a while since he had posed for professional photographers, so Killian hoped to God that his expression was relaxed and natural, as he followed the instructions that were being asked of the two of them. He posed with Emma for a number of images, just allowing the easiness of their friendship to fill him with the confidence he needed in that moment. When the photographers had a few shots of them together, Killian excused himself and stepped off to one side, to allow his friend her time to shine.

Emma was nothing but professional as she followed the instructions being given to her, twisting this way and that, to allow each photographer to get the best possible shots of what she was wearing. Killian loved watching her work, as it was clear that she enjoyed what she was doing. She would laugh every now and then, at whatever a particularly loud photographer had said, and he could only imagine how precious that moment would be to capture on camera. Emma’s laugh was a truly beautiful sight to behold.

His nerves kicked back in the moment she beckoned him over to her, ready to speak to the line of journalists that were armed with microphones and Dictaphones.

“Twenty bucks says the first question out of her mouth is, ‘how long have you guys been together?’” Killian whispered to his friend, complete with an overly-cheerful, high-pitched voice.

Emma giggled into his shoulder as she slapped at his stomach. “Wow. The gym has been _really_ good to you.”

He didn’t get the chance to respond, as they were quickly ushered over to a small taped cross on the floor, before the first team of journalists.

“Hi Emma… and Killian too. What a pleasant surprise this is. It’s so nice to see you both here this evening. Is this your coming out announcement? How long have you guys been together?”

Killian raised a brow at his friend that screamed _I told you so_ , while Emma did her best to ignore him, and answer the questions being asked of them. “Ah… this is not a coming out announcement,” she chuckled. “This is just two good friends supporting each other’s careers, the way good friends always should.”

Killian tightened his grip on Emma’s hip infinitesimally. It was his way of showing her just how right she was about his reasons for being there that evening, even if he couldn’t voice them in that moment.

“Well… there goes _that_ world exclusive,” their reporter joked. “Now… tell me about the movie. There’s so much buzz surrounding it this week. You must be really excited to see it on the big screen.”

“Oh, I am,” Emma chuckled. “I feel like I put a lot of myself into that role, and seeing a character you love brought to life on screen is always a satisfying experience. But tonight, I’m pretty sure there will be someone else in that theatre more excited to see this movie than I will be.” She turned expectant eyes up to Killian, and he blushed a little under the sudden attention being turned his way.

“Uh…” he stalled, scratching awkwardly behind his ear as he searched for the right words to convey his feelings that evening. “You know… Emma and I have been friends for so long now, and we talk about everything – including the roles we have coming up. I remember the call where she told me about the audition she had for this movie, and the subsequent call where she practically screamed down the phone at me because she’d landed the role.”

This time, it was Emma’s turn to blush under his words, as her friend tucked her into his side a little tighter, offering her a wordless form of comfort. She could barely remember those phone calls herself. She couldn’t believe that Killian could still recall them, given everything he’d been through since then.

“This was a project she was so excited and so passionate about. She told me about every stage of the work that went into getting this script off the page, and on to the screen. So, when your best friend is _that_ excited about a project, it’s hard not to be eager to see the finished production. Although, I already know it’s going to be an incredible movie. I mean, how could it not be with the amazing cast it has?”

Their interviewer spent a moment floundering for words, while her director whispered furiously into her ear. But Emma’s eyes were locked on her best friend. She knew the movie wasn’t going to draw the masses when it was released across the country, at a select few theatres. It wasn’t a Marvel blockbuster, nor was it an award-winning piece of cinematography. But Emma knew that if any of Killian’s fangirls had just watched his interview, he’d probably helped her sell at least a few thousand more tickets to the opening.

Killian spoke with so much passion and emotion that Emma felt herself falling that little bit more in love with him that evening.

“Well… I think we’ve taken enough of your time tonight,” their interviewer finally said. “Thank you so much for stopping to talk with us this evening; you both look fantastic. I’m looking forward to seeing the movie after that passionate speech you just gave, Killian.”

“Thank you.” Emma smiled genuinely as she heard Killian echo her sentiments. They waited just long enough for the signal that the camera had stopped rolling, before being ushered along to the next set of journalists.

“And thank you,” Emma whispered up at him, while they had a brief moment of privacy.

“For what?”

“For being you.”


	19. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I'm just gonna drop this one and run.**

“Morning,” Kililian yawned, making his way out of the bedroom and through to the kitchen, where Emma was sat sipping her coffee.

“I’m pretty sure we’ve crossed into afternoon territory right now,” she teased.

After the premier, the two of them had attended the after-party being hosted for Emma’s movie, where she had taken great pleasure in introducing her co-stars to her best friend, helping Killian make some new friends in the industry. They had finally made it back to her apartment in the early hours of the morning, and Killian had crashed on top of his bed still half dressed, the moment Emma had locked the door behind themselves. If he knew his friend as well as he thought he did, he was pretty certain she probably hadn’t made it much further than he had, before sleep had claimed her.

He stopped to drop a quick kiss to the top of Emma’s head, before pulling himself up onto a stool at the kitchen counter. But the moment his eyes met hers, Killian knew that there was something wrong. Her smile was far too forced to be natural. He had known Emma long enough to know the kinds of expressions she wore to cover something up.

And this was one of them.

“What happened while I was sleeping?” he asked.

Emma’s strange smile fell completely as she got up to pour her friend a mug of coffee, and sat it down in front of him. Killian waited patiently while she took her own seat, taking a moment to wiggle in it until she was comfortable. He knew that Emma would talk when she was ready. He just needed to give her the time to compose her thoughts.

“Your wife called me this morning,” she eventually mumbled, keeping her eyes fixed on the counter top between the two of them.

“She did what now?” Killian exploded.

“Calm down,” Emma sighed, as she reached over to rest her hand on top of his. “This was why I wasn’t going to tell you about it. I dealt with her.”

“Dealt with her how? Why was she even calling you?”

Emma stood from her seat to make her way round to Killian’s side of the worktop. She knew that her friend probably need some kind of physical comfort in that moment, and she was always happy to offer it to him.

“She apparently still has my number, and called on the off-chance that I hadn’t changed it since I’d last seen her. She saw our interviews together last night and wanted to know if we were sleeping together.”

“That’s none of her damned business,” Killian growled.

“I know it’s not,” Emma reassured him, as she reached out to rub soothing circles into his back. “I told her that we were just good friends, like we always have been, and that you were there to support me during a big night for my career. I also may have told her that she lost all of her rights to information about who you’re sleeping with, the moment she cheated on you.”

“What did she say then?” he wondered, leaning in to the comfort of Emma’s touch.

“Not much. She didn’t realise that you’d told me about the affair…. Why would she think that I didn’t know about it?”

Killian hung his head in shame for a moment. He didn’t want to admit to Emma just how much he had sacrificed when he’d split with Milah, because he knew she wouldn’t be happy about it. But he also knew that Emma wouldn’t stop asking until he told her the truth.

“Nobody else knows,” he confessed. “She begged me not to tell our friends and… I dunno, I guess I still loved her enough at the time to agree. The divorce papers say we’re splitting due to irreconcilable differences.”

“Oh Killian,” she sighed. “You should have told them the truth. Do you honestly think your friends would have stood by her knowing what she did to you?”

“Of course not. And that’s why I did it. She moved out here for me _years_ ago, Ems. She came out to a country she didn’t know, leaving behind all of her friends and family, just because she believed in me. Giving her our friends was the least I could do.”

“She doesn’t deserve to _have_ your friends,” Emma explained patiently. “Milah was a big girl and she made all of her own choices. She chose to believe in you and follow you out to Los Angeles. You didn’t force her into that situation. Just like you didn’t force her to cheat on you. You shouldn’t have sacrificed _your_ friends when she was the one who betrayed you.”

“Yeah well… it’s done now.”

Emma tucked herself into his side to offer him the best hug she could, in the position they were sat in. Killian didn’t hesitate to swing round on his seat to make things easier for the two of them, as he pulled her into his chest.

“Besides,” he mumbled into her hair. “I still have you. You’re the only person I’d have refused to sacrifice, Emma.”

Emma tightened her grip on her friend, and hoped to God that the dark colour of his t-shirt would help to hide the tears that had formed at his sweet words.

* * *

“Oooo, pizza,” Killian exclaimed, as his friend slid a large tray onto the table in front of him. “Did you make this?”

“Yep. While you were on the phone to your mother. How are your parents, by the way?”

“Good, thanks. Mam wants to know when I’ll be bringing you over to see them again? She’s missing your ‘beautiful smile,’ apparently.”

Emma snorted a little even as she pictured Cathleen saying those words. It had been a while since she’d last been in Ireland, and even longer since she had been in the country at the same time as her friend.

“Tell her I’ll clear some time in my diary soon, and then we can arrange a visit.”

“I told her you’re about to become a big movie star and wanted nothing more to do with the common folk,” Killian teased, as he leaned forward to snag a slice of pizza from the tray. “Speaking of, has there been any news on when you’ll start filming?”

“I have this small piece to shoot for the DC movie first, but the preliminary timetable is suggesting the middle of June.”

Killian did a few mental calculations, working out that if the preliminary schedule was anything to go by, he wouldn’t have long to wait until his friend was back in LA. But he might just have enough time to squeeze in a trip home to see his nephews, before she arrived.

“Okay. Let me know when you do and I’ll have everything waiting for you… oh my god… what did you do to this?” he asked, slightly horrified as the first bite of pizza hit his tongue.

“What do you mean?” Emma worried. She nibbled at the end of her own slice, chewed a few times, and then spat the contents of her mouth into her hand. “Oh God, that’s absolutely disgusting.”

“Uh huh,” Killian agreed. “Is it off?”

“It’s cauliflower,” she reluctantly confessed.

“Excuse me?”

“It’s a cheesy cauliflower base. It’s supposed to be healthier. And according to the internet, you can’t taste the difference.”

“Yeah, well… the internet lied,” Killian chuckled, as he pushed the tray of food further away from himself, like it had somehow offended him by just being in his presence. “Want me to order an _actual_ pizza?”

“God yes.”

* * *

Later that evening, Killian found himself bolting awake in middle of the night, with a light sheen of sweat covering his body.

He reached over to flick on the light, already knowing what he’d find when he did, but still hoping that maybe he’d be wrong.

“Fuck,” he sighed, scrubbing a rough hand over his face. “Fuck!”

It wasn’t the first time he’d had a dream so realistic, and so goddamned erotic, that he’d ended up coming in his pants while he slept.

But it was the first time a dream of his had featured his best-friend’s bare legs in a starring role.

“Fuck,” he cursed again, awkwardly manoeuvring himself to the end of the bed, so he could slide out and clean himself up. He pulled off his pants as best his could, balling them up and burying them in with the rest of his dirty laundry, before he began aggressively wiping himself down.

After he’d pulled on a clean pair of underwear, Killian dropped down onto the bed to pull forcefully at his hair, as he tried to sort through the rush of thoughts and feelings swirling through his mind.

It wasn’t like his appreciation for Emma’s physical form was new. Killian had always found her to be one of the most beautiful women he had ever met. But while he had quietly admired her beauty at the beginning of their friendship, he’d never given much thought to that attraction beyond the initial acknowledgement.

Instead, it was Emma’s inner beauty that had drawn them closer together. Her unwavering support for everything he did, and her cheeky sense of humour that often appeared at the most inappropriate of moments, had quickly won him over. Killian had soon found himself wanting to spend time with her because of the person she was, and not the way she looked.

He’d certainly never sexualised any part of their relationship before.

“Ugh, you’re overthinking this,” he whispered to himself, as he flopped back onto the mattress.

Killian hadn’t even thought about another woman since he’d caught his wife cheating on him. There had been the odd occasion where he’d woken up hard, and had finished himself off in the shower. But in those moments, he would choose to focus more on the feelings he was invoking in himself, rather than fantasising about anyone else being with him.

Maybe this was just his body’s way of making it’s needs known?

And maybe his mind had simply chosen to supply images of the only woman in his life that he truly trusted, and wasn’t related to.

“Yeah, that’s probably it,” he sighed, as he scrubbed a harsh hand over his face.

_God he hoped that was it._

Because Killian had no idea how he would face his best-friend in the morning, if his brain continued to supply images of her face in his dreams, while he was coming in his pants.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **As a side note - this chapter was written before Killian's mother's name was revealed on the show. I toyed with the idea of changing it to Alice, but I've been using Cathleen for this story for so long that Alice didn't seem to suit her.**


	20. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry for the delay with this one. If you follow me on Tumblr you'll know it was rewritten last week, which meant making some changes to the overall story before I felt comfortable posting it.**

Killian woke the following morning to the wonderfully enticing scent of coffee and bacon.

He groaned a little as he slipped out of bed, pulling on a pair of lounge pants before he made his way through to the kitchen, to find the source of that smell. In his sleep haze, he couldn’t quite remember what had happened in the middle of the night.

Until he caught sight of Emma.

She was stood at the stovetop wearing a pair of tiny shorts and a tank top. There were a few different pans on the go, as she made them what Killian was sure would be an incredible meal. And her Echo was pumping out music just loud enough not to have woken him, but at the perfect volume to allow her to dance around the small room as she cooked.

It was the playful movements of Emma’s hips that had Killian frozen in place, as his mind helpfully conjured up images from his dream the night before. Emma had been making similar movements with her hips then. But she certainly hadn’t been dancing for him.

“Killian,” she gasped, startling him out of his thoughts. “Jesus Christ, you scared me. I didn’t hear you come in.”

“I um… I only just woke up,” he stuttered out, shaking his head to clear it.

_It was just a dream. It didn’t mean anything_ … he chanted to himself.

“I hope I didn’t wake you,” she worried.

“Of course not,” he rushed to assure her. “I was woken by the delicious smells coming from in here. You know you don’t have to make restaurant quality food _everyday_ I’m here, right?”

“It’s nice to cook for someone other than myself,” Emma shrugged, turning her attention back to the stovetop. “Besides, you and I both know that this is probably the best home cooked food you’ll be eating until I come back to LA.”

Killian couldn’t argue with her on that point. While he could cook the basics, Milah had always taken care of their meals when they were together. And since they had split, he’d found himself relying either on restaurants, home deliveries, or frozen meals. Having someone he loved cook his favourites for him was definitely something he wasn’t planning to take for granted.

He busied himself for a moment with pouring the two of them each a mug of coffee, stirring in all of the cream and sugar he knew that Emma needed in hers to make it drinkable, before he lifted himself up onto a bar stool to watch as his friend finished preparing their meal.

He was more than halfway through his own drink before he realised that he’d been staring at Emma the entire time, and he frowned a little to himself as he did. There was nothing unusual about the situation they’d found themselves in. Emma had cooked for Killian before, and he’d sat in the kitchen with her as she had.

But as he sat there that morning, Killian found himself appreciating the simple domesticity of their situation far more than he ever had before. He knew he’d miss Emma when he was back in LA.

And the clock was ticking ever closer to his departure time.

* * *

“So,” he began casually, handing over a bottle of water for his friend as he took a seat beside her on the bench. “As this is my last day in the city, are we gonna talk about it?”

Emma had suggested spending Killian’s final full day with her at Central Park, and he had jumped at the idea. The two of them loved spending time outdoors, and exploring such a legendary location had been on the newly-created bucket list that Emma had talked him in to making.

They had started at the South end of the park, taking in all of the attractions it had to offer. Emma had lost count of the number of statues Killian had made her stand in front of, so that he could take a picture of the two of them with Beethoven, or Shakespeare.

From there, they had paid a visit to the zoo, where they had watched the penguins swim merrily in their pools, before Emma had spent an hour cooing over the snow leopards that were soaking up the early summer sun. Killian had bought her a stuffed version from the gift shop, along with a few trinkets he thought his nephews would love, and Emma had been cuddling it to her chest ever since.

He’d even managed to convince her to ride the carousel with him, snapping pictures on his phone as the ride went along, capturing Emma’s glorious laugh over and over again as he did.

But it was the Wollman Rink that had left them both stumbling to the nearest bench, desperate for food and drink. Killian had tapped out the second time he’d gone down hard, and Emma had followed soon after, limping a little after a nasty crash with one of the barriers.

“Talk about what? How bad we both apparently are at ice skating?”

Emma looked genuinely confused about what her friend was hinting at. And for a moment, he debated with himself about bringing up such an obviously touchy subject for her once more. But in the end, it was his desire to see her fulfilling her dreams, even if she was scared to make them happen, that won out over his desire to protect her.

“That script,” he reminded her gently.

“I thought you’d forgotten about that,” she sighed, fiddling with the paper label on her water bottle.

“How could I? Remember when I told you that Spielberg script was the best I’d read all year?” Emma nodded her head to show that she was listening, but kept her gaze fixed on her feet. “Well, I was wrong. _Your_ script is the best I’ve read all year. And I’m not just saying that because you’re my best friend and I don’t wanna hurt your feelings. I’m saying that because it’s the honest to God’s truth.”

She raised her eyes to meet his, hoping to find some trace of a lie behind his words, but all Emma could detect was that never-ending love and support that he’d always had for her.

Suddenly, Killian’s words from the red-carpet interviews they had given together the other evening came back to her.

_“When your best friend is that excited about a project, it’s hard not to be eager to see the finished production.”_

Only in this instance, Killian was the one that was excited about a project. And that project just happened to be hers. She could see that excitement behind his eyes, and hear it in his tone whenever he spoke about the script. This wasn’t Killian being supportive _because_ it was something Emma had written. This was Killian being supportive because he _believed_ in the project.

“You really think I should pitch it?” she asked softly.

Her best friend slid a little closer to her on the bench, pressing his thigh firmly into her own as he slipped his fingers under her chin, to tilt her face up to look at him. “I really do.”

He spoke with so much conviction that it almost had Emma reaching for the phone to make an appointment there and then.

“I’ll consider it,” she promised him. It was the best she could offer and they both knew it. While Killian might have gotten through to her in that moment, he knew Emma well enough to know that she would begin to doubt herself the moment the door closed behind him.

“Good. Because I’m gonna call every day and ask if you’ve done it yet,” he threatened with a light chuckle.

“Good,” she countered. “Because I might need you to give me that kick up the ass every now and then to make this happen.”

“I can definitely do that.” Killian wrapped his arm around her shoulders to tuck her into his side. “I know this is scary, Ems. But I truly believe you can do this.”

“You know that if I do pitch this script, I’m pitching you for the lead role, right?” she teased softly.

“Hell yeah you are,” her best friend laughed. “That’s the benefit of having a friend who’s an awesome screenwriter. You get all of the best roles.”


	21. Chapter 20

“Is it bad that I kinda wanna beg you to stay for a few more days?” Emma pouted, as she fiddled with her best friend’s fingers.

“Nope. Because I kinda wanna tuck you under my arm and run off with you right now,” he chuckled. “But at least we know we’ll be seeing each other again soon. It’s not like you’re about to jet off to Europe for months on end again.”

“No, you’re the one doing that this time,” she teased.

“For a week or two,” Killian corrected. He loved his family, but there was absolutely no way he could tolerate a month or two of staying with his parents. He’d sold his own home back in Ireland to fund his move to LA all those years ago. And as his stays were often only for a handful of days at a time, he’d always opted to stay with his family, rather than buying a new home that would stand empty most of the year.

“You know you can actually afford to buy a second home now, right?” Emma chuckled.

“I do. But I was thinking of waiting until _after_ the divorced was finalised to do that,” he sighed. In recent months, he’d found himself missing home more than he ever had before. The idea of having a place to call his own back there was hugely appealing, especially when he needed time to escape the brightness of LA. But the last thing Killian needed was for Milah to find out about his newest purchase, and start demanding half of a home she’d never stepped foot in before.

“Good plan,” his friend quickly agreed. “I’m surprised she’s not demanding half of the clothes on your back.”

Killian chuckled a little at his friend’s statement. Emma wasn’t wrong. Milah had wanted almost half of everything he owned so far. Her lawyer had argued that it was what was due to her, given how much she had sacrificed to support her husband’s career. But Killian got the feeling that her demands were more about trying to hurt him, than they were about getting what she deserved.

At first, he’d been angry about the whole situation. But now, he was just over it. Killian would gladly give her everything he owned, as long as it got her to sign those papers, and out of his life once and for all.

Emma flicked a look over to the clock on her kitchen wall and sighed once more. The days before Killian’s visit had seemed to crawl by impossibly slowly. But once he’d arrived, their time together had flown by at an alarming rate. As much as she knew that the Jones family would appreciate seeing their beloved son, brother and uncle once more, she was reluctant to say goodbye to him again.

It seemed like every time they parted, it just got harder to do.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come to the airport with you?” she asked.

“I’ll be fine.” Killian would have loved nothing more than those precious few additional minutes with his friend, before they were forced to say goodbye. But Emma didn’t have a car in the city. And he didn’t want to force her to take a taxi with him to the airport, and then back home again, just to say everything the two of them could say to each other in the privacy of her apartment.

Emma’s eyes were beginning to fill with tears, and she blinked hard to try and chase them away. She tried telling herself that she was behaving ridiculously. That she’d be able to speak to him when his plane landed. And that they would be seeing each other in less than two months.

But in that moment, two months had never seemed so far away.

“I want _all_ of the pictures from that DC movie,” Killian told her, attempting to lighten the mood a little.

“Of course you do,” she snorted. “You just want pictures of me in a white spandex leotard.”

The mental images that hit Killian at that suggestion were not at all what he needed with a six-hour flight to the other side of the country ahead of him.

“Yeah,” he croaked out awkwardly. “You know me, I’m a huge nerd at heart.”

“It’s why we all love you.” Emma looped her arms around his neck, as she smiled softly up at him.

“You’re gonna reach out to those studios to pitch your script before you come out to LA, right?” he reminded her sternly.

“Yes, Sir.” Emma let out an exaggerated sigh as she rolled her eyes a little. “And you’re gonna pass along my love to all the other Joneses back home, right?”

“I will indeed. I wrapped your gifts for the boys in my jeans, so they should survive the flight back to LA.”

For a moment, the two of them stood in comfortable silence, just savouring those last few minutes of contentment that only the other could bring to them, as they waited for the call to say that Killian’s car was ready for him. When it came, Killian silenced it immediately as he pulled her fully into his arms, to offer her a warm and tight embrace.

“Take care of yourself, Ems.”

“You too,” she whispered into his chest.

“I love you.”

“You too,” she mumbled back.

Killian gave her one last squeeze, before pulling back to take her hands into his again. “I’m really proud of everything you’ve achieved, Ems. Thanks for letting me celebrate some of that with you.”

“Thanks for _wanting_ to celebrate it with me,” she countered. “You’re a much less embarrassing date than my mother is.”

“Well… you can count me in for any future events you might need a date for, okay?”

“I’ll hold you to that, Jones.” Given how excited he’d been to see her small indie flick, she couldn’t imagine how the guy would react when she asked him to join her for the premier of the DC movie she was filming next, or the Spielberg piece after it. She had a feeling she’d be winning the award for best-friend-of-the-century after those two. “Now… go before you miss your flight.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” he chuckled, leaning forward to press a firm kiss to her forehead. “I’ll call you when I land.”

“Call your mother first,” she reminded him gently. “You know how Cathleen worries.”

Killian finally let go of her hands to grab his bag from the floor, as Emma made her way around him to pull open her front door. She knew that the longer they stood in her living room talking, the greater the chances were of Killian missing his flight. And while it wouldn’t be the end of the world if he did, they both had lives to live outside of each other.

“Goodbye, Emma.”

“Bye, Jones,” she smiled sadly.

He left before either one of them could say anything else, knowing that everything that needed to be said already had been, and anything else could wait until he called her, when his flight landed.

Emma shut the door softly behind him, turning her back to it to sink down to the floor, as she hugged her knees to her chest.

Being around Killian while he was married had been easy. He was forbidden fruit back then, and she had come to accept that. It hadn’t changed the way she’d grown to feel for him, but it had made it easier for her to push those feelings aside, and focus on being the best damned friend the man could get. After he’d caught Milah cheating, Emma had continued to push those feelings aside, focusing more on being the friend he so dearly needed in that time, more than anything else. Dwelling on her own desires had only succeeded in making her feel like a terrible friend, when Killian was clearly hurt and angry at the situation he’d found himself in.

But now that he was an almost-free man, and clearly starting to move on from his wife, it was getting harder to push those feelings aside. Feelings that only seemed to grow with the more time they spent together.

Which was why, in that moment, Emma realized that spending the entire summer with him while she filmed her movie, might not have been the best plan she’d ever made.


	22. Chapter 21

There was honestly no better sound in the world than the current screeches ringing out around the house, as two little boys screamed, “Uncle Killian!” while they ran for the man in question.

Killian dropped his bags to the floor to pull them both into a big hug, rocking a little on his heels with the force of their impact.

“Wow, when did you two get so big?” he asked, as he pulled away to look his nephews over from head-to-toe. “Are you sure you’re Alfie and Adrian? Your mammy and daddy didn’t trade you in for newer models, did they?”

“Don’t be silly,” Alfie scoffed.

“Yeah. We grewed,” his brother added helpfully, as Killian pulled them both back in for yet another group squish.

“I have some gifts for you in my bag, if you wanna look for them,” he chuckled, after eventually releasing them when they began to squirm. “I’m just gonna go say hi to your parents and grandparents, okay?”

“Okay,” the boys declared happily, already more excited about the prospect of gifts than they were about the return of their uncle.

“My boy,” Cathleen cooed. While her grandsons were distracted by their hunt, she pulled her son in for a tight hug of her own. “How are you? You look good.”

“I’m fine, Mam,” he assured her, his cheeks burning as they always did whenever his mother said something embarrassing. No matter who was (or wasn’t) around to hear it. “Emma fed me well when I was with her on the East Coast.”

“Of course she did,” Cathleen asserted. “She’s a good girl. How is she? When are we gonna get to see her again?”

“She’s busy,” Killian chuckled, as he extended his hand for his father to shake firmly. “But she’ll sort some time out to come and visit as soon as her schedule clears up. She misses you guys too.”

Killian heard a vague cry of triumph from somewhere behind him, signaling that his nephews had found their hidden treasure, as he allowed his mother to guide him through to the kitchen. Anna and Liam were already sat around the table, wearing matching smiles as they waited for him to greet them both.

Cathleen gave her son just enough time to take his own seat at the kitchen table, before she pressed on with her inquisition. “What’s she got coming up?”

“She’s filming a DC adaptation now,” he explained, as his father placed a cool beer in front of him. “Then she’s got a couple of weeks free before she flies out to LA to start work on the Spielberg piece. Oh, and I’ve been trying to convince her to pitch her own script,” he added, almost as an afterthought.

“Emma wrote her own story?” Anna asked hopefully.

While the two women hadn’t seen much of each other throughout their lives, Killian knew that they maintained a relationship across the ocean. There were plenty of Irish postcards pinned to the front of Emma’s refrigerator, that all had Anna’s beautiful penmanship on the reverse. And Killian knew that if he explored his brother’s kitchen while he was back home, he’d probably find a variety of postcards on their own fridge, signed with Emma’s usual signature.

“Yeah, she wrote her own script a while back now. But she’s not done anything about it. So I’m trying to convince her to change that.”

“Is it good?” Liam asked, cringing slightly at the question. “And by good I mean _good_ , not the it’s-Emma-so-anything-she-does-is-good kind of good.”

“It’s phenomenal. It has huge potential if the right studio picks it up. Which is why I’ve encouraged her to pitch it. Do you honestly think I’d encourage her to pitch something that would make her look bad?” Killian asked scathingly.

Liam threw his brother a look that had _fair play_ written all over it. He knew that where Emma was concerned, Killian could sometimes be a little blind. But his younger brother was making a fair point. There was no way he would ever encourage her to pitch something that would humiliate his best friend.

Everyone knew that Killian would never be able to live with himself if he ever did anything to hurt Emma.

“So… tell us about what you’ve been up to recently,” Cathleen begged, as she finished checking on dinner and took her own seat at the table. While Killian had been in touch with everyone since his last trip home, they all knew that he hadn’t been as open and honest with them as they would have liked. Having her son finally sat beside her once more, Cathleen was hoping he’d feel comfortable enough to tell them everything he’d been holding back for all that time.

“I um… I joined a gym,” he started hesitantly. “And I um… I’m seeing a therapist too. To work on some of my issues.”

Cathleen reached for her son’s free hand as he whispered his confessions into the tabletop, while the others listened intently. Killian had absolutely nothing to feel ashamed about, and she was determined to make sure her son left Ireland knowing that.

* * *

“Boys, did you wanna go and give grandma a hand setting the table for dinner?” Liam asked, as he made his way through to the lounge. His sons had been sprawled out across the floor with their uncle, and one of the new board games he’d brought back from Los Angeles with him.

It was possibly the quietest they’d been all year.

“Oh, do we have to?” Adrian pouted, turning those patented Jones puppy-dog eyes up to his father.

“I invented that look,” Liam snorted. “It’s not gonna work on me.” He lowered his voice slightly as he dropped to a crouch and added, “But it might work on Grandma if you wannna steal a sausage while you’re helping out.”

As he’d expected, the prospect of being the first to sample grandma’s meal worked wonders, and the two lads were soon on their feet and running for the kitchen. Which left Killian to clean up the mess from their game.

Liam watched in silence for a moment, before he lowered himself to his knees to help his brother. “You doing okay?” he asked quietly.

“Huh?” Killian turned his attention back to Liam, reading the hidden question in his eyes, before sighing as he dropped the box down to the floor. “She’s not making things easy,” he admitted quietly.

He’d been fairly open with his family about his struggles during their discussion in the kitchen earlier. But there were certain parts of the last couple of years that Killian had deliberately held back, knowing his mother’s fiery temper.

“She’s asked for and gotten far more than I ever should have given her,” he confessed sadly. “And she’s still not signed the damned papers. But I’m over it now.”

When he lifted his head to meet his brother’s eyes, Liam could see the sincerity behind his words.

“If she thinks this is gonna make me see sense and take her back… she’s insane. All it’s doing is making me hate her more for what she’s done to our marriage. I just want it over now. Then I can finally move on.”

“I don’t blame you, Brother.” Liam reached out to clap the younger Jones on the shoulder in solidarity, before a thought suddenly occurred to him. “Moving on, huh? Is there someone new we should know about?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Killian scoffed. “Like I’ve had time to date recently. I just want to move on to the next stage of my life, that’s all.”

Liam nodded his head in understanding, but his eyes said something that Killian didn’t quite understand.

* * *

The two men had just finished tidying up the lounge when Killian’s phone beeped with the notification of an incoming message, from its place inside of his pocket.

It didn’t take a genius to work out who the message was from. Liam saw the way his brother’s face lit up as he unlocked the small device to read it in full. There was only ever one person who could pull that kind of smile from Killian Jones.

But when his face dropped in shock, Liam started to worry that something bad had happened.

“Killian?” he asked gently.

But his brother gave no signs of having heard him speak, let alone acknowledging Liam’s concern.

“Killian?” he tried again, as he turned to head back to where the other man was standing.

Liam craned his head slightly to see what was written on Killian’s screen, but had to do a double take at the image that was currently filling it.

“Dude… Is that Emma?” he asked carefully.

“Yeah,” Killian croaked out slowly.

He clearly couldn’t believe what he was seeing either.

It took Liam another heartbeat to work out why she was dressed the way she was, before he erupted into loud and obnoxious snorts of laughter.

“What the fuck is so funny?” Killian snapped, as he locked his phone and slid the device back into his pocket.

“Nothing.” Liam continued to chuckle as he made his way out of the room and into the kitchen, where his laughter echoed off the tiled walls.

“Clearly something is,” Killian snapped back firmly, as his anger began simmering under his skin.

Emma had held true to her word. After her costume fitting that morning, she had sent her best friend a couple of shots of the finished design for her heroine’s look.

The tight, white, spandex bodysuit she was wearing was far more revealing than anything Killian had _ever_ seen her in before. Even with the slight adjustments that had clearly been made to make the suit more family friendly. It had been combined with a pair of pure white bracers, and over-the-knee white leather boots. With her long blonde hair flowing around her shoulders, and the beauty spot that had been added just to the right of her ruby-red lips, Emma looked every inch the comic-book dream fifteen-year-old Killian had often fantasized about.

She was stunning in the role.

And there was absolutely nothing funny about it, as far as he was concerned.

The others in the room looked a little confused at the hostile exchange between the brothers. Liam continued to laugh off the tension, as he slid into a free seat between his wife and his youngest son.

“Dude… one day you’ll see the irony in this situation.”

“What situation?” Anna asked carefully.

“Emma’s role in that new DC movie is as Dream Girl,” he replied, before erupting into larger peals of laughter.


	23. Chapter 22

While Killian was back home with his family in Ireland, Emma was busy zipping herself into a tight, white bodysuit every day, for her latest movie. She was having fun with the role, but she hated the tightness of the costume they’d finally settled on for her character. The director had wanted to stay as close to the comic portrayals of her superhero as he possibly could, without verging on being inappropriate for a family audience. So while the bodysuit now featured hot pants and had a higher neckline, it was still a lot of work to get in and out of at the start and end of her day.

_The things actors did for the love of their craft._

One of the wardrobe assistants on set had just finished zipping her up and was leaving the trailer, when Emma’s cell phone started to ring with an unknown number flashing on the caller display. She usually ignored calls from unknown numbers, but there was something inside of her that morning telling her to answer it. A part of her brain that sounded an awful lot like Killian’s voice.

“Hello?” she asked softly, praying that she hadn’t just answered the phone to some kind of crazy fan. She really didn’t need the hassle of changing her number again.

“Hi. Am I speaking with Emma Swan?” a rather peppy voice asked. Emma was certain that she didn’t recognise it. But she hoped that the tone meant this wasn’t a bad news call.

“Yes, you are,” she confirmed. “Who am I speaking with?”

“Hi. My name is Janice, and I work for Mr. Friedman at Lionsgate Films. Mr. Friedman wishes to speak with you about the piece you recently sent to the company for review. Are you available to talk right now?”

Emma dropped down onto the sofa behind her, cringing a little at the way the action pulled on her bodysuit in an unflattering (and slightly painful) manner. “Yeah I um… I could talk.”

“Okay. Please hold the line for Mr Friedman,” the peppy secretary instructed, just before the usual hold music sounded over the call.

After Killian had left New York, he’d been relentless in his quest to have Emma pitch her script to a studio. He would message her multiple times a day, asking if she’d placed any calls yet. After a week of his constant hounding, Emma had gotten so frustrated with it that she’d actually found herself reaching out to a few contacts within the industry. Which she suspected had been Killian’s plan all along. While she had been too busy to pitch her own piece, she had passed the screenplay along to someone she knew and trusted, who in turn had promised to place it into the hands of people he thought could help her.

The news had managed to stop Killian’s constant messages, but Emma hadn’t ever expected to hear back from someone about it. And certainly not so soon.

“Miss Swan?”

“Yes,” she croaked out, suddenly a little nervous about the outcome of the call.

Emma wasn’t stupid. She knew who Mr. Friedman was. And she also knew the man didn’t often place many personal calls.

“How are you?” he asked conversationally. “I hear that you’re filming something at the moment for the DC universe. How are you finding that?”

“I’m loving it, Sir. It’s a nice change of pace to the roles I usually play. And everyone on set is wonderfully welcoming. How about you?”

“Oh, I can’t complain,” he dismissed easily. Friedman had clearly decided that the time for pleasantries was over, and he was ready to get down to business. “The reason for my call is that Bryan sent me a document of yours that he thought I should read. Are you aware of this?”

“Yes,” she whispered into the line, as her free hand tightened its grip on the cushion she was sat on. Emma couldn’t ever remember being this nervous before in her entire life.

“Excellent news. Now, I have to admit, I was a little sceptical at first,” he began honestly, and Emma was sure she was about to throw up. “We get a lot of screenplays here through actors we’ve worked with in the past. They seem to think that just because they can act, they can also write. And I can assure you Miss Swan, that’s often not the case. Which, as I’m sure you can imagine, frequently makes for awkward business dealings in the future.”

Emma wanted to stab Killian in that moment. This was exactly why she had been reluctant to submit her work. She didn’t want to limit her future acting roles due to an embarrassing encounter over her script. Her career was just starting to pick up, the last thing she needed was to sabotage it by trying to pitch studios a shitty screenplay.

“But I read through the one Bryan passed along to me as a favour to him, and I can honestly say that I’m pretty sure I now owe him another. I loved it. We loved it. When can we get you to Santa Monica to discuss terms?”

Emma almost dropped her phone with the shock that was exploding inside every one of her veins.

“I’m sorry, could you just repeat that?” she asked, a little dumbstruck.

Friedman laughed heartily over the line. “We love it and we want to make you an offer,” he confirmed. “When will you be available for negotiations?”

“Um… I um… I can be in California next month,” she replied lamely.

“Excellent news. I’ll have Janice contact you again by the end of this week to set something up. That should give you some time to let the news sink in a little.” He chuckled again and Emma felt her face fill with a rush of blood. “It was lovely speaking to you this morning, Miss. Swan. I look forward to making your acquaintance.”

“You too,” she rushed to add, before he could end the call. “Thank you so much.”

“Have a great day,” Friedman replied, before disconnecting the line.

Emma was so stunned by what had just happened that she found herself simply gripping the phone tightly to her chest, as she replayed the entire conversation in her mind over and over again.

When it finally began to sink in, she reached for the small device once more, determined to call Killian and share her news with him. But someone else had other plans, as there was a short, sharp knock on the door to her trailer, before one of the costume assistants let themselves in.

“You’re needed on set soon, Emma. I thought I’d come and give you a hand with your boots,” she explained, completely oblivious to the joy that was currently making the actor glow.

“Thanks. That would be great,” she replied softly, as she locked her phone and sat it down on the sofa. She’d call Killian as soon as she finished filming for the day. That way, the two of them could celebrate together with wine, even if they weren’t in the same room to do it.

“You’ve got a couple of action scenes today,” the assistant explained, as she helped slip on the long white boots, and then begun to tighten the laces on them. “If you struggle with the shoes let the director know, and we can swap them out for flats just for those few scenes. But he’d obviously prefer you keep these ones for continuity purposes.”

“Shit. I completely forgot today was another running-in-heels day,” Emma complained.

But even that couldn’t touch the glow that was currently radiating from every single pore on her body.


	24. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Please forgive any mistakes in this one. I've been tinkering again. A lot.**

“Hi Aunty Emma!”

Emma chuckled at the overly-enthusiastic greeting, as she waved back through her webcam at the two lads sat either side of their uncle.

“Hey boys,” she greeted. “How are you?”

“We’re good,” Adrian chirped, as he bounced a little in his seat. “Fankoo for our gifts.”

“Aww, you’re welcome. Were they okay? I always forget which ones you guys have already.”

Alfie held up the small robot in his hand to show her the gift that she’d found for him on her travels, and had sent back with Killian. “He’s my favourite. You can _never_ have too many of him.”

“That’s good to know. Now… are you happy to have your uncle home for a visit?”

“Yeah,” they both cheered. “We’re going to da football on Sunday,” Adrian explained, as his brother added, “He makes the best dinosaur noises.”

“Yes he does,” Emma agreed. “I might have to put a word in with my new director for the next Jurassic Park movie. What do you guys think?”

Killian snorted from his position between the two lads, who seemed to think that having an uncle voice a dinosaur would be the coolest thing ever. But he remained silent as he gave the boys a few moments to chat with Emma, so that they could catch her up on their day. Adrian and Alfie were clearly more vocal than she was, but Emma seemed to be enjoying their tales. Killian knew how much his nephews loved seeing her, and how much Emma adored the two of them. It had been a while since she’d been able to fly out for an actual visit. So the last thing he wanted to do was steal Emma’s attention from them during the precious little time they had together.

When his nephews finally started to wind down, their time at the beach clearly showing as their shoulders began to drop, Emma asked them softly, “Boys, do you mind if I have a moment alone with your uncle? There’s something important I need to speak to him about.”

A frown creased Killian’s brow, but he encouraged his nephews to say their goodbyes, as he ushered them out of the room. When he was sure that they were safe with their father once more, he shut the door carefully behind them before he slipped back into his seat, and pulled the laptop a little closer to him.

He and Emma had only been apart for twelve days. Most of which Emma had spent on set filming her latest feature. But he’d learned long ago that whenever a woman said she needed to speak with him privately, it was rarely for a good reason.

However, the moment his eyes landed back on the screen, Killian’s mind froze.

Since the boys had left, Emma had taken off the jacket she had been wearing when the call had first connected. Now, all he could see was that wonderfully tight, white leotard that made up her Dream Girl costume.

“You um… you didn’t change?” he finally croaked out, cursing himself for the way his eyes were hungrily roaming over the screen, taking in all the small details that he’d missed when she’d first sent her pictures. From that close, Killian could see the additions that had been built into the design, offering Emma complete coverage and support, whilst also enhancing her natural assets. When she turned slightly in her seat he could see the bare flesh it revealed of her back, reminiscent of one of his all-time favourite cover images. And Killian could just make out the edges of those white leather boots at the very bottom of his screen.

Those damned boots had haunted his dreams ever since she’d sent those pictures of herself in costume.

“Do you have any idea how difficult it is to get in and out of this thing?” she scoffed, completely unaware of her best friend’s inner turmoil. Killian forced himself to laugh along with her, but all he could think about was the many ways in which his brain had already shown he could help her out of it.

“Besides, I thought you’d get a kick out of seeing the design in all of its glory.”

“Yeah. I um… yeah, I appreciate that.” The geek inside of him truly did. Killian appreciated the thought she’d put into her gesture. It wasn’t Emma’s fault that he was apparently so starved of sexual contact that his brain had chosen to fixate on his best friend in a completely inappropriate way.

“Are you okay?” she asked softly, frowning a little in concern.

“Yeah. I’m fine,” he rushed to assure her. The last thing Killian wanted to do was worry his best friend. “I’m just nervous about what kind of news you have to tell me that requires privacy. What’s going on, Ems?”

“It’s fine,” she reassured him, as a wide smile began tugging at her lips. “It’s nothing bad. It’s actually good. Really good. I um… The chairman of Lionsgate Films called me today. He wants to arrange a meeting for when I’m back in California, to discuss negotiations to purchase the rights to my script.”

“Oh my God! Emma… That’s… that’s fucking incredible,” he declared. Killian didn’t even attempt to fight the smile that was working its way over his face. “That’s fantastic news. When did you get the call?”

“This morning,” she chuckled, happy to see just how excited her best friend was about it. “I was gonna call you then, but I had to get to set before I could. I literally called as soon as I was back in my trailer. You _had_ to be the first person to hear this news.”

“Damn right I did,” he chuckled. “I will gladly accept full responsibility for this humongous achievement. Which means you owe me big time when you do get to LA.”

“We shouldn’t get carried away just yet,” she argued. “You and I both know that not everything survives the negotiation phase to go into full production.”

“Please, Emma. You and I both also know that if they want to start negotiations, it’s good news. My best friend’s about to become a screenwriter!” he declared giddily.

“Don’t jinx it yet.”

Emma had known that Killian would be happy to hear her news. But she hadn’t quite expected him to be _this_ happy. His excitement was making her giddy, and she found herself wishing that she was close enough to him to share in it. This was definitely the kind of moment they should be celebrating together.

With copious amounts of liquor.

“Pfts. If Lionsgate are stupid enough to not put this film into production, I know someone else will. But I don’t think you have anything to worry about, Ems. That script is incredible. You know it. I know it. And now Lionsgate knows it too. This is amazing news.”

“We’ll have to celebrate it properly when you’re back on my side of the pond.”

“Yes we will,” he agreed. “At least we’ll have plenty of time to do so over the summer. Will you be coming out any sooner for the meeting?”

“Um… yeah. About that,” she began awkwardly. Broaching the topic of her summer living arrangements, right after sharing her big news with her best friend, felt wrong. But Emma also knew that Killian had just given her the perfect opportunity to do so. And she didn’t want to have to lie to him.

“I’ve been thinking. Don’t take this personally but… I think maybe it would be for the best if I rented an apartment while I was in the city. I mean, between this meeting and any subsequent ones they might want to arrange, and then the shooting schedules I’ve been given… I’m gonna be basically living at your place for the next three months. That’s not fair on you, Killian.”

“That’s ridiculous,” he scoffed. “You know it doesn’t bother me, Ems. I like having someone else in the house. I’m not used to living alone. And you’re a far better roommate than anyone else I’ve lived with before. You’re my best friend. I’d much rather share a home with you, than I would with anyone else.”

“I don’t wanna ruin our friendship,” she whispered softly into the camera.

“Me either,” Killian assured her. “I’ve lost enough of those over the last few years, Emma. The last thing I wanna do is lose you too. But you have nothing to worry about. I wouldn’t have offered for you to come and stay with me if I thought it was gonna lead to us arguing over something petty and falling out. I _know you_ , Ems. I know you better than you know yourself some days. Which is precisely how I know you’re gonna be the best damn roommate I’ve ever had.”

When he spotted the usual signs of Emma’s resolve weakening, Killian decided to go in for his killer blow. “I’ve been looking forward to having you there,” he told her softly, looking up at the camera from underneath his lashes.

It was an unfair move, and they both knew it.

“I’ve even been decorating your room for you.”

“My room?” she asked, looking both shocked and touched by his sweet gesture.

“Well, of course. It’s a five-bed house, Ems. There was always gonna be an ‘Emma room’ in it for when you came to stay.”

There was absolutely no way she was going to be able to refuse his offer now that she knew about how much work he’d put into preparing for her visit.

And they both knew that too.

“You’re playing dirty there, Jones,” she warned.

“I never said I wouldn’t.”

There was a moment of comfortable silence through the connection, as Killian smiled smugly at his friend. It was their way of saying that the issue had been resolved, without needing the words to do so.

“How’s Ireland?” Emma eventually asked, not quite ready to say goodbye to her friend just yet.

“Cold and peaceful. But it’s good to be home. My brother’s still an insufferable arse, but it’s kind of nice to be on the receiving end of it once more. I didn’t realise how much I’d miss his teasing when I first left home. And it’s reassuring to see that he’s not treating me any differently than he was before the divorce.”

“Of course he’s not,” Emma declared. She knew Liam well enough to know that he would want to make his brother feel as comfortable as possible, while he was visiting. The Joneses had missed their son, uncle and brother while Killian had been dealing with everything that had happened to him in Los Angeles. The last thing they wanted to do was scare him away for another year. And for Liam, that meant continuing to treat Killian exactly as he always had.

“But I get it. It’s the little interactions like your annoying big brother teasing you, and your mother’s overbearing protectiveness, that make a place a home.” Emma had travelled enough over the last three years to realise just how true that was. While she missed places like New York and Los Angeles, it was the people who resided in them that she found herself missing more than the location itself.

“Yeah,” he agreed quietly. “That being said, I’m also counting down the hours until I can get away from him again.”

Emma snorted out a laugh at that comment. It sounded much more like the Killian and Liam Jones that she knew and loved.

“But enough about us. How’s production going? The little bits you’ve been sending over look incredible. I can’t wait to see this movie. How have DC not given Dream Girl her own spin-off yet?”

“It’s probably because nobody knows who she is,” Emma giggled. “Well, apart from you.”

“Yeah, well… that’s a damned tragedy,” he defended, as his friend’s giggles turned to full-blown laughter. “They have no idea what they’re missing out on.”


	25. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry for the slight delay with this one. My brain was telling me on the re-read that it was time for someone to start figuring some things out.**

About an hour into their call, while Killian was describing one of Alfie’s particularly amusing trips from the day, that had resulted in the little boy face-planting into wet sand, he was interrupted by a sharp rap on Emma’s trailer door.

“That’s probably someone from wardrobe,” she explained, as she leaned back in her seat to call out, “It’s open.”

Killian wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle the rest of the call, knowing that Emma was undressing somewhere just off screen, so he prepared himself to say his goodbyes. But was stopped dead in his tracks when someone he didn’t recognize made their way up the steps, and into the small room.

Because Killian knew instantly that the person who had come to see his friend wasn’t from the wardrobe department.

“Hey Emma. Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realise you were busy.”

“It’s okay,” she assured the newcomer. “I was just talking to Killian. What’s up, Graham?”

_Graham!_

Killian had heard about him. He was playing one of the extras in the movie, but from what Emma had told him so far, Graham seemed to be more interested in _her_ , than he was in the production schedule.

Not that Emma had realised it.

Killian was certain she was clueless about how men looked at her sometimes.

“I was um...” Graham paused for a moment to fidget awkwardly, and suddenly Killian felt his stomach begin to churn. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know what was coming next.

“I was just wondering if you wanted to grab a drink with me, before you head home?” he asked nervously.

Killian felt like he was watching a train wreck. He couldn’t seem to pull his eyes away from the screen, as he waited for Emma’s answers. And yet, at the same time, he felt a little sick watching the entire scene unfold. There was a large part of his brain screaming _NO, NO, NO_ on a loop, and he wasn’t entirely sure why.

From everything Emma had said about the guy so far, Graham was the perfect kind of date for her. He was relatively new to the industry, which meant that he wasn’t the kind of jaded scumbags she had often described meeting for dates. Emma seemed to enjoy all of their interactions together on set, and had even gone as far as to describe Graham as someone who could become a good friend.

And yet, every one of Killian’s instincts was telling him that he _hated_ the guy.

“Killian!” Emma called out, startling his attention back to her once more.

“Sorry. Mam was just yelling something at me,” he lied. “What’s wrong?”

“I was asking if I could call you back later tonight?”

“Yes, of course,” he told her, putting on his best smile as he did, while he cursed himself internally. Killian had been so busy fixating on all of the ways in which he hated Graham, (like how his eyes were a little too narrow, suggesting that maybe he shouldn’t be fully trusted), and had completely missed Emma’s answer to the guy’s question.

_Surely she wouldn’t have accepted his offer, right?_

“Call me when you get some time,” he told her.

“I will do. Send the boys and everyone else my love.”

Emma waited just long enough for him to nod his agreement before she reached out to end the connection. But he still managed to catch the way she turned to face Graham as she did, flashing Killian a glimpse of her bare back in the process.

“Fuck,” he cursed, slamming his own laptop closed with his frustration.

Why did he suddenly care so much about who Emma spent her time with? It had never been an issue for him before.

“She’s not gonna date him,” a soft voice whispered from the doorway.

Killian jerked his head up to meet his sister-in-law’s eyes, before narrowing his own.

“I was coming to tell you dinner was ready,” she rushed to assure him. “I promise I wasn’t eaves dropping. I just caught the tail end of your conversation. I did announce my presence, but you seemed pretty out of it.”

“Sorry. Long day,” Killian chuckled. “What um… why would you think I cared if she dated Graham or not?”

Anna hesitated for a moment before she took a step to place herself fully inside of the room, and closed the door softly behind her.

“It’s okay, Killian. I’m not gonna tell anyone else. You can trust me.”

“Trust you with what?” he laughed. “I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about, Anna.”

“I think you do,” she replied. “I think you’re trying to fight it, but deep down, I think you know exactly what’s going on.”

“As you seem to know so much, why don’t you enlighten me?” he snapped back at her.

Killian had never spoken to his sister-in-law that way before, but she was poking at something even he didn’t quite understand, and lashing out had seemed like the best way to make her stop.

“You have feelings for her,” Anna replied gently. “And that’s okay.”

Killian didn’t need to ask who the _her_ was. There was only one _her_ in his life that it could possibly be.

“I don’t have feeling for Emma,” he protested.

All of his feelings for her were completely platonic. The kind all friends shared with each other. And his current sexual attraction to her was just a result of seeing her bring his favourite superhero to life. It was more of an attraction to Dream Girl, than it was to Emma.

At least, that was what he had been telling himself.

“She’s my friend. Nothing more.”

“You know… there was a time where we all believed that.” Anna propped herself against the edge of the desk, careful not to sit on the expensive technology that was spread across it, as she fixed Killian with a heavy stare. “And I’m sure you and Emma believed that too. But it’s okay for feelings to change. To grow and develop. That’s natural.”

“Nothing’s growing and developing,” he spat back at her.

Killian really wasn’t sure where Anna was getting this ridiculous idea of hers from. But it was the last thing he wanted to hear from her that evening.

“Really?” she asked, cocking a brow in his direction as she folded her arms across her chest. It was a look Killian had seen plenty of times before. Although, it was normally only aimed at his nephews, when they were misbehaving.

“So it honestly wouldn’t bother you if Emma went on a date with Graham? Maybe you should call her back and tell her that,” she encouraged, slipping her hand into her pocket to pull out her phone. “I’m sure Emma will love knowing she has your support here. And as you’re her best friend, I’m sure she’ll wanna tell you all about it too. Tell you about where he takes her, and what they do. She’ll probably tell you about their first kiss, and how giddy it made her feel inside. And a few months later, she’s gonna wanna tell you about how perfect the moment was for their first time together. How gentle and sweet Graham was with her.”

Killian screwed his eyes shut as if that would help block out the images his mind was creating at Anna’s words. Emma in a pretty dress, similar to the one she’d worn for Tribeca Film Festival, sat opposite Graham in a restaurant, as the two of them laughed together. Graham holding her hand as he walked her back to her apartment, and the kiss he’d give her goodnight. Their naked bodies writhing together on top of her colourful bedspread, as Emma arched her back and called out Graham’s name.

“Yeah. I didn’t think so,” Anna pointed out smugly, as she watched the emotions flit over his features.

But Killian could barely hear her.

All of those invasive thoughts and strange feelings that he’d written off as being just a product of their closeness had come rushing back to him, hitting him in the gut one… after another… after another. Culminating in his irrational hatred for the man he had just watched ask his best friend out on a date.

Killian didn’t _hate_ Graham, he was _jealous_ of him.

“Are you okay?” Anna worried, as she rushed over to where he was standing. Killian looked like he was about to fall down.

“Oh God,” he whispered, as it finally hit him.

His back collided with the wall behind him, and he felt himself slowly sliding to the floor, until he was able to cradle his head between his legs.

Anna was right.

Their friendship had started off as exactly that. A friendship.

The two of them had always been close, but it wasn’t like it was now.

Somewhere along the line, they had developed a closeness that had managed to sneak up on them both, transforming their friendship from one that was supportive and platonic, to that of being intimate and loving. They’d started seeking the kind of comfort from each other that could only come from the person who knew you best.

The kind of comfort he’d watched Anna and Liam offer to each other throughout their relationship.

And while Killian still loved Emma as his best friend, he was starting to realise that his feelings for her were no longer as platonic as he had once believed them to be.

“I’m falling for her.”

“You’re probably the last person in the world to work that out,” Anna chuckled, as she slid down to the floor beside her brother-in-law. “But it’s okay, Killian. This isn’t a bad thing.”

“How is this not a bad thing?” he worried, tugging on his hair anxiously.

“Why would it be?” she countered. “You’re single. Emma’s single. You have this _insane_ chemistry with each other. There’s literally nothing bad about this situation.”

“I can think of a million things wrong with this situation,” he threw back at her. “Like the fact that she doesn’t feel the same way about me, for a start. Or how about the fact that she’s my best friend, and I _really_ don’t wanna lose her. Or how about Graham, who she’s now about to go and get drinks with? How about...”

Anna cut him off before he could say anything else. She could see the way his mind was spiralling into despair, and that was the last thing she had wanted to achieve that evening. “Okay. First of all… you’re not gonna know how Emma feels about you until you ask her. For all you know, she loves you just as much as you love her.”

Killian snorted out a, “yeah, right,” but Anna barrelled on as if she hadn’t heard him.

“Secondly, Graham is not an issue. Trust me. Emma has no interest in him romantically. At all.”

“You can’t possibly know that,” Killian protested.

“Oh, really?” Anna fished her phone back out of her pocket to pull up her most recent message thread with Emma. She’d wanted to thank her friend for thinking of Alfie and Adrian while she had been travelling, and as most of their conversations tended to do, things had spiralled from there.

“I’m sure she won’t mind you reading it. But just in case, allow me to highlight the key points for you.” Her fingers scrolled up a little to the place where Graham had first come up, and Anna read aloud as Killian skimmed through their conversation. “’He’s a sweet guy, but he’s not really my type. I feel like the wardrobe girl, Ruby, would be a much better match for him. They have a lot in common.’”

She cocked a brow that screamed, _I told you so_ , but Killian was far too busy freaking out over his revelation to tell her to knock it off.

“Mum,” came a yell from somewhere just outside of the door, and Killian’s eyes widened in fear. He wasn’t ready to face anyone else just yet, and he’d forgotten that he was stuck in a house full of his family.

“Don’t worry,” Anna assured him, “I’ll take care of everything. I’ll tell them that you’re not feeling well and sneak you some leftovers a little later, okay? Take as much time as you need.”

“MUM!”

“I’m coming, Alfie,” she yelled back, before turning soft eyes back to her brother-in-law once more. “Just remember, this isn’t a bad thing, Killian.”

She squeezed his bicep gently before pushing herself back up to her feet to leave the room, and find her son, who was waiting impatiently outside for her.

Killian heard through the crack in the door as Alfie asked if his uncle was okay, before Anna replied with, “Uncle Killian’s just feeling a little poorly right now. I’m sure he’ll be fine in the morning.”

But Killian wasn’t sure he would ever be ‘fine’ again, after his revelation that evening.


	26. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry this one has taken so long. I had a LOT of editing to do after the changes to the last chapter.**

Anna knocked gently on the door to her brother-in-law’s room, before pushing it open at the sound of his grunt from inside. She cringed a little as she took in Killian’s dark form, lounging against the headboard. His hair was a mess from the way he’d been pulling at it all evening, and there were dark circles forming under his eyes.

“Hey,” she greeted softly, as she pushed the door closed behind herself. “How did you sleep?”

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” he snarled back, turning to face her as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair again.

Killian had tried sleeping, but he’d finally given up at around three am. Every time he drifted off he found himself dreaming about Emma…and Graham. How she’d laugh at his jokes, or how she’s squeeze his hand as they walked down the street together. How she’d nip softly at his lips as she kissed him, and how she’d look writhing on top of him, as the prick pumped himself up into her.

He’d given up on the idea of sleep after that last one, and instead, had sat in silence as the sun slowly began to rise over Ireland.

“Oh, Killian,” Anna sighed, as she balanced a tray containing a mug of strong coffee; and plate loaded with poached eggs on toast, on his lap. She carefully arranged the skirt of her dress around her legs, before sinking down to sit at the very edge of his bed. “It’s all gonna be fine. You have _nothing_ to worry about,” she soothed.

“With all due respect, Anna, there’s absolutely no way you can guarantee that,” he snapped back. “Look… I just… Just drop it, okay? All I wanna do is forget about this entire thing and go back to how things used to be.”

“Why would you wanna do that?” she asked, outraged at the mere thought of Killian’s plan.

“Because I’ve already lost _everything_ this year,” he growled at her. “I’m not losing the one good thing I have left in my life over some stupid school-boy crush.”

“Oh, Killian.” She reached out to run a gentle hand over her friend’s arm, before squeezing it softly and standing from her place at the edge of the bed. “Do you really think this would be the thing to pull you and Emma apart? Isn’t it worth taking a risk to see if it could push you even closer together?” she asked.

Anna left the room before Killian could say anything else, leaving her brother-in-law to his own thoughts, and his breakfast.

* * *

Killian sighed as he silenced the incoming call on his phone, before switching the device off.

It had been fourteen hours since his ground-breaking revelation, and Emma had tried calling him three times already that day.

It wasn’t that he was deliberately trying to avoid her calls, he just wasn’t sure how to talk to her after what had happened the night before. The last thing he wanted was for things between the two of them to become awkward, after what he’d worked out. And until he knew how to manage his own feelings, he’d felt that dodging her calls would be the best option for everyone.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Liam asked, as he side-eyed his brother.

“Nothing,” Killian replied, although even to his own ears he could hear just how fake that sounded. He really wasn’t in the mood to explain everything rushing through his mind to his brother, of all people.

But it looked like he wasn’t the only one who had noticed that.

“Liam, would you mind giving me a hand with making up the bed?” Anna asked softly, as she shot her brother-in-law a sad smile. “I’m sure Killian can keep the boys amused for ten minutes.”

“As long as making the bed is all you’re planning to do,” he shot back. Because even while his gut was eating itself alive with his worries, Killian could never resist the urge to tease his big brother.

“ _Please_ , you’re just jealous because you’re not getting any,” Liam snorted, as he followed his wife out of the room.

Killian would have protested harder, but he could hear Anna’s harshly whispered admonishment of, “You haven’t gotten any lately either, so I don’t know why you’re teasing him for it,” as they climbed the stairs.

“What are you and daddy not getting?” Alfie asked innocently, as he turned to face his uncle.

Killian scrubbed a harsh hand over his face to hide the amusement dancing behind his eyes, while he tried to come up with a somewhat convincing lie to tell to his nephew. “Ice-cream. I’m not getting any ice-cream. I’m watching my figure.”

“Yeah, Mammy won’t let daddy have any either,” Alfie told him seriously. “She said it’s bad for his teeth.”

“Your mammy is absolutely right,” Killian chuckled. “Now, what would you boys like to do this afternoon?”

* * *

Killian and his family had just taken a seat in the lounge after dinner, when Liam’s phone began to ring from the place where he’d left it charging in the kitchen. The elder Jones brother released a hefty sigh as he pulled himself out of his seat to answer it, mumbling, “this had better be bloody good,” as he did.

When he returned a few moments later holding the device out for his brother to take, Killian looked a little startled.

“It’s for you,” Liam explained. “Why are you dodging Emma’s calls?”

“What? I’m not dodging her calls,” he scoffed, flicking a look over to Anna before bringing his eyes up to his brother’s face. Killian knew that Liam would see straight through him if they made eye contact, but he also knew that his brother would ask too many questions if he didn’t at least look his way.

“Well, Emma thinks you are. So if I were you, I’d explain to her what it is you’re _actually_ doing.”

Killian bit down on his tongue to stifle the retort that wanted to explode from his mouth, as he took the phone Liam was holding out to him and rose from his seat to seek some privacy. It was only when he had the kitchen door firmly closed behind himself that he lifted the small device to his ear to whisper, “hello,” into it.

“Really? Hello? That’s all I get?”

“I’m not dodging your calls,” Killian sighed, as he sank down to rest against the wall behind him. “I’ve just been busy, Ems. You know how it is.”

“No. I know _you_ ,” she countered. “I know that no matter how busy you get, you always make time for me. Even if it is just a quick message to tell me how busy you are, and that you won’t be calling. Just as I do for you. So what the hell is going on, Killian?”

He blew out a harsh breath as he used his free hand to tug on his hair. He had been avoiding Emma’s calls because he was worried that she would know him well enough to pick up on the difference in himself, since his big revelation. He should have known that Emma would see straight through that plan.

“Sorry, Ems. I just, um… I had some stuff I needed to work out. It’s not you,” he assured her. Because even if it was about her, this reaction was all on him. The last thing Killian wanted was for Emma to feel like she was the reason he was pushing her away.

“Do you need someone to talk it through with?” she asked softly.

“Maybe. Just um… just not right now, okay?”

“Okay. You know where to find me whenever you need me.”

Of course, Killian’s traitorous brain chose that moment to helpfully explain, _this is why you love her_ , at her words, as he tried desperately to push the invasive thoughts aside.

“How about a distraction?” she asked instead, sensing his inner turmoil in a way that only she could. “I um… I tried calling you today because I um… I got a call from Sony Pictures. They want me to meet with them to negotiate terms for the rights to my script.”

“Holy fucking shit,” he almost yelled into the phone. “What did they say?”

“They seemed really eager,” Emma chuckled. “I explained that Lionsgate had already been in touch, but they still want to arrange a meeting so we can discuss things in person. I told them I’d be coming out to LA a little earlier than I had originally planned, so we could talk then.”

“This is fantastic,” Killian declared. “Emma, do you know what this means? You have bargaining power now. Two _huge_ studios are going to be fighting for the rights to _your_ movie, and _you_ have the power to decide who gets it and for what cost. I don’t wanna be the dick that says I told you so right now, but I fucking told you how incredible that piece was.”

The sound of Emma’s laughter down the line filled Killian with a kind of warmth that his entire body had been lacking all day, without contact from her. He hadn’t realised just how much he’d missed their communications, until that moment.

“I haven’t told anyone else yet,” she replied giddily. “A part of me still keeps wondering if this whole thing is some kind of wonderful dream. And I guess telling others might shatter the illusion. But I um… I couldn’t _not_ share this with you. This wouldn’t even be happening without you Killian, and I have absolutely no idea how I’m _ever_ gonna repay you for all of this.”

“You don’t have to repay me for anything, Emma. I love you. All I want is for you to succeed and be happy in life. That’s payment enough for me.”

Killian swallowed back the lump in his throat as he heard his own words echo through the line. How had he been so stupid as to write off his feelings for her as those of just close friends? Emma’s happiness meant more to him than his own did. It was a sure sign that he felt more for her than he had been willing to admit to himself before.

“You know what this means, right?” Emma teased playfully, over the other end of the line.

Killian found himself smiling back and relaxing into the wall behind himself at her tone, as he asked, “No. What does it mean, Love?”

“It means now that I have bargaining power, I’m gonna use it make sure you land the role of Sergeant Davis in this feature.”

“You don’t have to do that,” he protested. Killian knew how big this movie was going to become, even if Emma still didn’t quite see the full potential it had.

“Oh trust me, I’m doing it just as much for me as I am for you,” she argued. “I wrote that role picturing you playing him. There’s no way it’s going to be the same movie if they cast someone else for it. Besides, I _know_ you’re the best person for this job.”

Killian’s heart warmed at Emma’s words even as he struggled to believe them. He was sure there was a number of Academy Award winning actors who would throw their names forward for the lead role, once they’d read Emma’s script. But her complete belief in his abilities never failed to lift his spirits.

“Thank you,” he whispered into the phone.

“Of course.”

There was a moment of silence over the line, but it didn’t feel awkward at all. And it was in that instant that Killian realised he didn’t need to push his best friend away, while he was trying to sort through his feelings for her. He could still be the kind of friend he’d always been to Emma, because deep down, Killian knew that those feelings had been building for a while. And they hadn’t managed to change anything between the two of them so far.

“Hey, Ems?” he whispered softly into the handset.

Emma hummed to let him know that she was listening, but didn’t say anything else.

“I’m sorry I didn’t take your calls today. I missed you.”

“I missed you too,” she told him sincerely. “I can’t wait until we’re both back in the same state again. It already feels like it’s been far too long since I got to hug you.”

“I’m already counting the days,” he promised her.


	27. Chapter 26

While Killian joined the rest of the males in his family, travelling to Dublin for a day spent watching football together, Emma decided to make a trip of her own. After renting a car for the day, she made the two-and-a-half hour drive up to New Haven, where her parents lived.

While the Nolans were a relatively close family, they were also a busy one, and Emma hadn’t seen much of her parents since she’d returned to the country. When David and Mary-Margret weren’t busy with their own vacation plans, to celebrate their upcoming anniversary, they were kept busy with work. Emma’s mother was an elementary school teacher, who adored her job just as much as the kids she taught adored her. And her father worked for the local police department, helping to keep the streets safe for all that resided there.

With her younger brother, Neal, already home from college for the summer, and a free day ahead of herself, Emma had decided it was the perfect time to break the news of her potential screenplay deal to her family.

The drive over to the state she’d grown up in was always filled with nostalgia for her. She had brought Killian back a couple of times before, during promotional stints in New York for the show. Emma had wanted to share some of the sights Connecticut had to offer with her best friend. But it had never been for long. Milah had always been back home in LA, eagerly awaiting her husband’s return. And truth be told, Emma had felt guilty for stealing him away for trips around the country, when he had a loving wife waiting at home for him.

But now that he was a single man once more, she couldn’t help but wonder if her friend would be interested in accompanying her on a few trips she had planned for later in the year. They’d never really had the time for her to show Killian everything she wanted to before, but now, there was nothing stopping them from going wherever they wanted, whenever they wanted.

When she finally pulled the car into the driveway of her childhood home, Emma felt a sense of _right_ wash over her for the first time since Killian had left her apartment all those weeks before. While she absolutely loved her job, and all of the opportunities it had provided her with, the isolation some roles could bring was hard for her to adjust to at times.

Because as much as Emma loved being a strong and independent woman, she also enjoyed being surrounded by the people she loved most in the world. It was just a shame that getting everyone together at the same time always proved to be virtually impossible to achieve.

“Mom? Dad?” she called out, as she pushed her way through the front door, with a gift bag hanging from each arm.

“Emma?” Mary-Margret poked her head out from the kitchen doorway, just to check that she was hearing what she thought she was. “What are you doing here?” she asked, as a wide smile broke across her face.

That face disappeared for a moment, before the rest of her reappeared with it, as she made her way down the hall to pull her daughter into her arms.

“I had a free day, and Neal told me you guys were home for the weekend. I thought we could spend it together,” she explained, as her mother squeezed her so tight, Emma worried she might actually pop. “I um… I also kinda have some news to share with you all,” she added, when Mary-Margret pulled back to get a good look at her daughter.

“Oh my God. You’re pregnant,” she gasped.

“What? No,” Emma protested furiously. “Why would you even assume that?” She looked down at herself to see if the new jacket she was wearing was bulging in unflattering ways, but there didn’t appear to be any lumps or bumps where there shouldn’t be. “There would need to be… _things_ happening… for that… _thing_ to happen. And there’s not,” she explained awkwardly, wishing the ground would choose that moment to open up and swallow her whole.

Emma _really_ didn’t need to be discussing her lack of a sex life with her mother that afternoon.

“I though…” Mary-Margret shook her head to clear whatever it was she had thought was going on with her daughter from inside of it, and decided to change tracks. “Never mind. Your brother and father are in the lounge. Go through and make yourself comfortable.”

Emma handed over the gift bags that were full of goodies she’d brought back from her travels, before she slipped off her coat to hang up with the others, and then made her way through the house to find the rest of her family.

Killian wasn’t the only one who had spent his day enjoying a soccer match, if the scene that greeted her in the lounge was anything to judge by. David and Neal were occupying the couch, wearing their favourite team’s jerseys. There appeared to be popcorn strewn all over the floor, which Emma knew would be cleaned up before her mother came through, and a few empty beer cans littered the coffee table.

The two of them were so engrossed in the game that they were watching, they didn’t even notice as she slipped into the room to take a seat in one of the free armchairs. Emma watched on fondly as they both yelled their frustrations at the television, before pulling out her phone to snap a quick picture of the two of them to send to her friend.

**How long until they notice I’m here?**

After a day of dodging her calls earlier that week, Killian had gone back to being the sweet and attentive friend he’d always been to her. He hadn’t explained what had happened, but that didn’t really matter too much to Emma. She knew that when he was ready, he’d open up to her. She was just glad to have her friend back.

And he didn’t disappoint that afternoon.

_That all depends on who’s playing._

**New England Revolution.**

_Yeah, you’ve got no chance of being noticed before that game ends!_

She smothered her giggles with the back of her hand as she tapped out her reply. Killian knew her family far too well, but that was just another reason why she loved him. Nobody else in her life had ever taken the time to get to know her parents and brother, the way Killian had.

Emma watched as those three little dots appeared on her screen once more, and waited to compose her reply until she got his next message.

Instead of words, Killian had attached an image of himself with Adrian and Alfie, clearly taken at the stadium they had been to visit that morning. It never failed to warm her heart to see just how much the boys loved their uncle.

Killian had once confided in her that Milah had never been interested in having children of her own. And while he would have relished the opportunity to become a dad, Killian had loved his wife enough to respect her wishes on the issue. But Emma would never deny that seeing him with his nephews was a sure-fire way to make her ovaries flutter.

The man would make a wonderful father one day. And while it would kill a little more of her soul to see that happen with another woman, Emma found herself hoping that she would still be a part of Killian’s life, when that day came.

_These two loved attending their first game._  
_And they told me to tell you that they love their Aunty Emma too._

Emma smiled softly down at the device in her hand as she saved the image to her camera roll, before flicking back to their conversation. It had been far too long since she’d last seen the boys, but their love for her never failed to make her day that much more special.

**Tell them I love them too.**  
**And I’ll see them soon.**

“Are we not good enough for a hello?”

Emma snapped her attention away from her phone to see her father and brother staring in her direction. She’d been so distracted by Killian’s messages that she hadn’t realised the game was over. Or that the TV had been turned off.

“I could say the same thing,” she chuckled, as she stood up to meet them halfway, letting her father pull her in for a tight hug first, before Neal gave her a slightly more subdued version. “When I came in, you guys were far too interested in the game to notice me.”

“Pfts. We knew you were there,” Neal lied. “How’s things, Sis?”

“Going well,” she chuckled. “The DC project has been so much fun to work on. And I’m really hopeful for a follow-up role. The director has already offered me a few additional scenes in this one, over what I was originally contracted for. He said he was loving Dream Girl’s part in the feature, and he wanted to make the most out of her first appearance in the franchise.”

She made a quick mental note to share that information with Killian when she called him later that evening, as he’d already fallen asleep by the time she’d been given the news on Friday, and he’d been far too busy with his family the day after. She didn’t want to be the one to distract him from that precious time he had left with his family. Emma knew how much they missed having him around, so she also knew how much they would be loving the time they could all spend together.

Mary-Margret chose that moment to poke her head into the room as she declared, “Lunch is ready. Make sure you clean up that mess before you come through,” before she disappeared once more.

Emma shot her father and brother a knowing smirk as she followed her mom through to the kitchen to ask, “Is there anything I can do to help at all?”

“Nope. It’s all been taken care of, Sweetheart. Go and sit down,” Mary-Margret encouraged, as she pressed a kiss to her daughter’s cheek.

* * *

Emma waited until everyone was seated, and the food had been served, before she finally spoke up. “So, I um… I have some news to share with you all.”

“We already know,” Neal mumbled around a mouthful of mashed potatoes. He received a sharp slap around his head for that one, as his mother snapped, “manners,” while Emma raised a curious brow at her brother.

“How do you know?” she asked. “It’s not supposed to be common knowledge yet.”

“Shouldn’t have gone on a public date with him then, should ya?”

Emma set her fork down on her plate as she leaned in a little closer, just to make sure she was hearing Neal correctly. “Date? What date? I haven’t been on a date in months.”

“The premier thing,” he explained, waving his own fork full of food around, before he stuffed it into his mouth.

“Okay, first of all… that’s gross. It’s like being at college has made you to forget all of the manners mom and dad ever raised you to have. And secondly… that wasn’t a date. I was with _Killian_. We’re just friends.”

Neal gave his sister a look that clearly suggested he didn’t believe that claim, but before anything else could be said, Mary-Margret interrupted the two siblings to ask, “What was your news, Sweetheart?”

Emma sent her brother one last death-glare, before she turned her attention to her parents. “I um… I wrote something,” she began softly, picking up her fork so she would have something to fiddle with. “A screenplay,” she added, as if that would help them work out exactly what it was she was trying to tell them.

“That’s wonderful news, Honey. When can we read it?” her mother asked, seeming genuinely interested to do so. Having spent so long growing up with her parents around, Emma could tell the difference between the genuinely interested parental tone they used, and the obligingly interested one her father was usually left to offer up.

“You um… you don’t actually have to read it.” She raised a hand to silence her mother’s protests before she could speak, because Emma knew what Mary-Margret was about to say. “If all goes well next month, you could just come to the premier of the movie instead.”

For the first time in her life, there was an absolute silence that filled the Nolan home that afternoon, at the sound of her words. Emma couldn’t ever remember the house being that quiet before.

“You’re making a movie?” her father eventually asked.

“I’m not, no. Lionsgate or Sony Pictures might be, though. I have meetings with both of the studio’s executives next month, to discuss terms with them. But they seem pretty eager to turn it into a feature-length film.”

“Oh, Honey,” Mary-Margret gushed, as she ripped her napkin from her lap and threw it down on the table, before making her way around to where her daughter was sat. Emma soon found herself folded into her mother’s arms, as words of praise were whispered into her hair between tears of joy.

David eventually managed to peel his wife away from their daughter, and convince her to sit back down, as he wrapped a strong arm around Emma’s shoulders and dropped a kiss to her head. “We’re so proud of you, Emma.”

“Thanks, Dad.” She smiled up at him with watery eyes as she laughed a little at the tears that were building in them. “Damn. Even Killian didn’t manage to make me cry.”

“He already knows?” her mother asked curiously, as she finally returned her attention back to her food. But Emma didn’t miss the look her parents shared, when they thought she wasn’t paying them any attention.

“Yeah. He um… well this wouldn’t really be happening without him. He found the script when he came to stay last month, and he wouldn’t leave me alone until I had someone pitch it to some studios. I told him after Lionsgate contacted me, because he deserved to know. But I wasn’t gonna say anything to you guys until after that meeting, just in-case it all fell through. Now that Sony are entering the picture too, I figured this thing might actually be happening, and you’d probably wanna know that.”

“Of course it’s happening. My daughter’s a bloody genius,” David asserted, as if that alone would be enough to assuage all of Emma’s insecurities. And although there were still some lingering doubts in the back of her mind, she had to admit that hearing how much her parents believed in her, along with Killian’s constant and unconditional support, had her actually starting to believe that maybe, just maybe, she could walk away from those negotiations with a signed contract in place.

“Nice one, Sis,” Neal added. “Can you do me a favour and cast Angelina Jolie for a role? I’ve always wanted to meet her, and I hear she’s single now too. We could become the next big thing - _Nelina_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I just wanted to clarify here (as it's not explained in detail just yet) that Emma was born a Nolan, and changed her name to comply with SAG regulations.**


	28. Chapter 27

Saying goodbye to his family was far more difficult than Killian had expected it to be. Especially with his young nephews there, begging him to stay just that little bit longer.

“But why do you have to go?” Adrian whined, as his mother tried desperately to calm him down.

“I have to get back to work,” Killian explained gently. “But I promise I’ll come and see you guys again soon, okay? I’ll even drag your Aunty Emma along with me.”

“Okay,” the little boy sniffled, as he turned his face into his mum’s chest to dry his tears.

“We love you, Uncle Killian,” Alfie told him, as the young lad threw himself into his uncle’s arms.

“I love you guys too,” he chuckled, reaching up to wipe away Alfie’s tears. “And I promise, I’m gonna do better this time at keeping in touch with you all, okay? I’ll call _at least_ once a week. And we can chat for as long as you’d like, about anything you’d like.”

“Even dragons?” Adrian asked, as he turned away from his mother. Anna was trying not to laugh at the quick change of emotions her son had gone through, at the thought of discussing mythical creatures with his uncle.

“Especially about dragons,” Killian assured him. “What kind of people are you talking to who don’t wanna talk about dragons?”

He opened his arms once more and wasn’t disappointed when they were immediately filled with the little boys who meant so much to him.

“I love you both. And I promise, I’m gonna be a better uncle to you from now on. I’m sorry I let you down.” He pressed kisses to the tops of each of their heads and squeezed them a little tighter, before releasing the boys back into Anna’s arms.

“You take care, little brother?” Liam told him, as he pulled him in for a firm hug and a manly back slap. “And call us if you need _anything_. We’re you’re family, Killian. We love you and we’re not gonna judge you.”

“I will do. Take care of Anna and the boys, big brother.”

“I always do,” Liam chuckled. “Now, come on, Lads. Let’s go and wave Uncle Killian away from the window upstairs, shall we?” he asked, offering his wife a moment alone to say her own goodbyes, while he worked to calm their children down.

Anna waited until the sound of footsteps on the stairs faded completely, before she turned to face her brother-in-law. “Everything will work out the way it’s supposed to,” she stated confidently. “Have a little faith.”

“I will do. Thank you, Anna. For everything,” Killian told her sincerely, as she pulled him in for a warm hug, and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Killian still wasn’t sure that everything would work out the way Anna seemed to think it would, but he wasn’t willing to crush that optimism inside of her just yet. His time spent on the phone with Emma over the last few days had shown him that the two of them could at least still maintain their friendship, when he wasn’t actively thinking about what she was or wasn’t wearing.

He only hoped that he would feel the same way when he was finally back in her presence again. Because he was _really_ looking forward to spending all of the summer with his best friend by his side once more.

“I’ll see you guys soon,” he offered, as he squeezed her gently one last time, before grabbing his bag from the floor to head out of the front door, and over to the taxi that was already waiting to take him to the airport.

* * *

The flight back to Los Angeles was long and boring, but Killian hadn’t expected anything less. He’d tried to get as much sleep on it as he could, but the person behind him had decided to binge watch some kind of comedy series during their time in the air, and she’d spent most of the journey laughing loudly.

When he finally arrived back at the place that he now called home, Killian was shocked to find something completely unexpected waiting for him in his mailbox.

He’d known that his mail would pile up while he was out of the country, but the large manila envelope he found halfway through the stack was the one that caught his attention. Even after almost two years apart, he’d recognise the handwriting that had addressed it anywhere.

With slightly trembling fingers, Killian dropped down onto his sofa to open it up, and carefully pulled out the pages that had been tucked inside of it. There was another smaller envelope resting on top of the larger sheets of paper, so he sat those aside to read the note that had been slipped into it.

_Killian,_

_I’m so sorry._

_I never intended to make this more difficult for you, I just wasn’t ready to let you go. I’m not sure I ever will be. But I’m hoping that this small gesture will at least go some way towards us possibly becoming friends again in the future._

_I love you, and I always will._

_Milah._

He scrubbed a harsh hand over his face as he set her message aside to flick through the rest of the papers she had included in the package. It didn’t take him long to realize that it was her copy of their divorce agreement, now fully signed in all of the right places.

His wife had finally signed the document that would terminate their marriage, and Killian wasn’t really sure how to feel about that.

So he did the only thing he could think to do in that moment.

* * *

“Sorry,” Emma apologized, as one of the assistants on set handed over her phone. “I’ll be right back.”

She’d been trying to ignore Killian’s calls while she was filming, but the fact that he’d tried continually six times in a row suggested that something might have been wrong. Everyone had agreed to take a small break to allow her to answer the call, just to put her mind at ease.

“Killian?” she asked, as soon as she had the device pressed to her ear. “What’s wrong?”

“Milah signed the papers,” he whispered softly.

It took Emma a moment to work out what he was talking about, before she fully understood the reason why he was calling. Thankfully, by that point she was already at the door to her trailer, and she hurried inside to give them both some privacy.

“That’s a good thing, right?”

“Yeah. I mean, this is what I wanted. I just… it’s all over now. And I don’t really know how to feel about that,” he explained. “I’ve um… I spent over fifteen-years of my life with that woman. And now it just seems like it’s all been such a waste. I’ve wasted almost half of my life with her, Ems.”

“You haven’t,” she protested fiercely. “You did good things during that time. And before she became a lying, cheating, whore you loved her fiercely. That’s not a waste of your time, Killian. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, but you grew so much as a person during your marriage. That’s not something to regret.”

“I just… I dunno, Ems. A part of me keeps wishing I could go back to before that night, and do whatever it was I needed to do to make sure she was happy enough to stay. Another part of me wants to celebrate that this is all over now, and just get on with putting it behind me. And a much larger part of me wants to drink until the year’s over and I hopefully forget the whole thing. How am I supposed to feel right now?”

“I don’t think there’s a formula for this, Killian. I think you just need to take some time to yourself to work out how you feel, and how you want to proceed. This isn’t something I can do for you, I’m afraid.”

“I know,” he sighed. “I guess I just… I’m so used to coming to you with this stuff, Ems. It sucks not having someone to turn to for this kind of thing.”

“I am _always_ here when you need me,” she assured him. “But I can’t tell you how to think or feel, Killian. That’s not how any kind of healthy relationship should work. I can offer you guidance, but I can’t tell you what to do. Instead, I’ll just be here for you when you need me, regardless of the decisions you make.”

“I love you, Emma,” he whispered into the line, so softly that she almost didn’t catch it.

“And I you,” she whispered back. “But I _really_ need to get to set before the director starts yelling at me.”

“Shit, you’re at work?” he asked, before mumbling to himself, “Of course you are. It’s the middle of the morning for you.”

“It’s okay. He’s a great guy, so I’m sure he won’t mind too much. I’ll give you a call as soon as I’m done for the day and then we can talk some more, okay?”

“Okay, Ems. Have fun.”

“Thanks. I’ll talk to you real soon,” she promised, before disconnecting the line.

* * *

After a quick call to his lawyer to confirm that Milah had filed all of the necessary paperwork on her end, Killian was at a loss for what to do with himself. Eventually he decided to head down to the gym, in the hopes that working out some of his frustrations would help to clear his head.

But as he was getting changed that afternoon, the golden band on his left hand caught his attention, and he stopped half-naked, dropping down onto his bed to examine it.

He’d been lucky when he’d won the role of Agent Sloane on the show. The character’s tragic backstory had left him widowed, and the casting director had described him as a man who still wore his wedding ring. The wardrobe department had already purchased a band for him to wear, but they’d had no problems letting him keep his own ring for convenience.

Which meant that since the moment his wife had slid it onto his finger all of those years ago, Killian had never removed his wedding band.

Now, with those papers still sat on his coffee table, it felt like the right time to say goodbye to that last little piece of his marriage that still remained.

Killian reached down and gently wiggled the golden ring until it finally slipped free of his finger, before sitting it down on his bedside table. It had left a slight indent in his skin from the tightness of the band, and if he looked carefully enough he could see where the tan he’d gotten from the Los Angeles sun didn’t quite reach the bottom of that finger. But other than that, his hand looked perfectly normal without the ring on it.

And for some reason, that thought filled Killian with a kind of serenity he hadn’t expected to feel.

While the divorce itself had been a big change in his life, it had been almost two years since he and Milah had split as a result of her actions. More had changed during those two years than he could count, but taking off his ring hadn’t changed anything.

Just as her signing those papers would change nothing.

He still felt angry and hurt over what she’d done to him, and the way she’d dragged things out. He still wanted nothing more to do with her once the divorce was finalised, no matter what her notes said. And he was still in love with Emma.

Everything that Killian had felt before he’d opened her stupid letter, he still felt after reading it.

Her words had gotten under his skin more than he’d thought they would, but in the end, they’d changed nothing. And if that had been what she was looking to achieve with them, she had failed.

Killian finished dressing himself that afternoon before he slipped his wedding band into the back of his sock draw, and then headed out of the house to meet with one of his personal trainers. He no longer felt the need to work out his frustrations, but Emma had liked the firmness of the muscles he’d been building with his previous sessions, so he wanted to work at keeping those for her.


	29. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry for the delay with this one. For some reason, my muse likes to tell me to rewrite these chapters before I post them. But I promise, I won't let this one defeat me.**

Killian pulled his car into the familiar spot that he had been using for almost the last decade, before killing the engine.

The summer had seemed to pass by so quickly, and many things in his life had changed during those few months. The start of a new filming season felt like it was bringing with it the start of this second chance life was giving to him. And he found himself excited to see where the rest of the year would take him.

Of course, it helped that in less than a week’s time he’d be reuniting with Emma once more. Because Killian truly hoped that his best-friend would feature heavily in whatever the future would hold for him.

As he made his way through the familiar corridors and towards the conference room the network always allocated for table reads, Killian found himself calling out cheery greetings to every person he recognized.

Normally, the start of a new season was something he didn’t like to celebrate. When Emma had left the show, she seemed to take that buzzing atmosphere with her, and while Killian had found his days enjoyable, they had become much more subdued than they were whenever she returned.

But for some reason that morning, he felt the familiar buzz of anticipation filling the corridors once more. It gave him the hope that he would be able to go back to enjoying his time on the show as much as he always had done, before everything in his life had changed so drastically.

When he pushed open the door to take his place at the head of the table, Killian was only mildly shocked to find the seat next to his already filled. He’d completely forgotten that Ashley had decided not to return for a second series with the network, until that moment. And in her place sat a brunette who looked to be roughly the same age as he was.

After exchanging brief greetings with the writers and directors, along with the supporting cast he knew well, Killian made his way around the table to his allotted seat. But he hesitated for a brief moment before he sat down.

“Hey. I’m Killian,” he introduced himself softly. “Welcome to the wonderful world of procedurals.”

“Oh, hey,” she greeted, turning around to offer him her full attention. “Thanks. I’m starting to think I have no idea what I’ve truly let myself in for.” The actress flicked through the small stack of scripts in front of her on the table to make her point, and Killian found himself chuckling as he reached for a bottle of water.

He could remember saying something very similar to Emma when she’d introduced herself to him, during their first table read together.

“You get used to it after a while,” he told her, repeating back his best friend’s words from all those years before. “It becomes sort of second nature after twelve-ish episodes.”

“Thank you,” she giggled. “I’m Belle, by the way. Belle French.”

* * *

By some strange twist of fate, Emma’s last day on set as Dream Girl happened to be the same day as Killian’s first table read for the next season of his show.

Emma couldn’t help but feel a little bittersweet as she stepped into that tight white leotard once more. She’d come to love her small role in the DC franchise far more than she ever thought she would, when she’d initially agreed to the part. And now that it was coming to a close, she was reluctant to say goodbye to her new superhero alter ego.

Thankfully, both the director and the studio had been making all the right noise about a possible Dream Girl spin-off, depending upon public reception, and Emma had certainly made her voice heard on the issue. If the people in charge decided that a spin-off was on the cards for the franchise, she would gladly step back into that leotard once more.

“Hey, Emma. I can’t believe it’s your last day today,” Graham sighed, as she carefully made her way onto the set. “Do you think you’ll be coming to the wrap party?”

“I uh…”

The truth was she hadn’t much thought about the wrap party that would inevitably take place when filming was completed. Emma’s mind had been focused on the upcoming negotiations she had with some of the biggest studios in the world.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to make it,” she told him honestly. “I have some meetings in Los Angeles that I can’t miss, and then we start work on my next acting project.”

“That’s a shame.”

Emma could see the disappointment behind the guy’s eyes. It wasn’t just her attendance at the wrap party that he’d been hopeful for. She could tell that he had believed it to be his last chance to impress her, and she hated crushing that spark inside of him.

While Graham might not have been the man for her, he was a sweet guy, who deserved to find happiness in what could be a brutal industry.

“You know, I’m sure Ruby would love to go,” she said instead, hoping that he would maybe take the hint and start to see what had been in front of his eyes the entire time he’d been on set. “Maybe you guys could go together?”

“Ruby?” Graham looked confused for a brief moment before a smile worked its way over his face, as he said, “Oh, you mean Red from wardrobe? You think she would?”

“Trust me,” Emma chuckled. “I _know_ she would.”

* * *

When the director called cut for the final time that day, Emma wasn’t sure if she wanted to cry from the relief of having finally nailed all of her scenes, or from the sadness she felt at the strong possibility that she might never step into the role of Dream Girl again.

She fixed a wide smile on her face as she embraced the people around her that had become friends over the past few weeks, before finally making her way back to her trailer. After all of the running she’d been asked to do in those thigh-high boots, she needed to sit down for at least an hour, before she attempted to remove the skin-tight costume she’d come to love.

When she finally had a bottle of Diet Cola in hand, Emma reached for her phone with the intention of calling Killian one last time, as one of his favourite superheroes.

But the notification at the top of her screen had her frowning in confusion.

She’d subscribed to her best friend’s tweets years ago, and in that time, she could count the number of non-promotional messages he’d sent on her fingers. So the notification that he’d tweeted that afternoon surprised her.

Shaking off her confusion, Emma unlocked her phone and pulled up the message, to see what Killian had found the need to communicate to the world. But once again, she found herself frozen in surprise at what she saw on her screen.

With everything going on in their lives, Emma had completely forgotten that her friend would be in need of a new co-star for the next season, and she had certainly forgotten that Killian’s first table read would be their first official meeting.

She didn’t know anything about the Belle French that had been tagged in Killian’s picture, but Emma knew that she already disliked the woman. The photo he had chosen to share of the two of them looked _far_ too intimate for two people who had only just met each other.

“Ugh. You’re being completely unreasonable,” she told herself, as she closed out of the app to tap her phone against her knee. Emma had never felt that way about Milah while she’d been married to him.

_So why was she suddenly feeling that way now?_

Killian was an actor. It was his job to make his chemistry look natural and easy with people he’d only just met. Emma couldn’t go around feeling jealous of every single woman he worked with.

She would drive herself mad that way.

She shook her head a little to try and push aside the feelings burning away at her insides, before she unlocked her phone once more, and opened the Facetime app. Her best friend answered the call almost immediately, and as soon as his beautiful face appeared on her screen, Emma found all of her problems melting away.

“Hey,” he greeted. “How was your last day on set?”

“It was good. We got everything done on time, and without any problems. I’m just relaxing for a bit before I head home,” she explained.

“Has anyone said anything more about a sequel?”

“Not since last time,” she sighed. “But they’re gonna wanna wait on public opinion before they do anything else.”

“Your next role will probably help too. I mean, a Spielberg blockbuster’s gonna put you on people’s radars, Em. Combine that with a relatively unknown DC hero, who has a whole world of untold stories to explore, they’d be crazy not to spin her off a few times over.”

“Thank you,” she whispered softly, as she sank back into her seat. Even though Emma wasn’t entirely sure it would ever happen, Killian’s belief in her abilities made her hope that it would, just so that she could make him proud.

“Now, talk to me about your day,” she prodded. “I completely forgot you were getting a new co-star. Tell me all about her. What’s she like?”

“She’s great,” Killian gushed. “A little shy, but really down-to-earth and friendly. I think we’ll get along well. She’s a big fan of the show too, so that helps.”

Emma couldn’t help the spike of jealousy that ran through her at Killian’s words, but she tried her hardest to stamp it back down. He deserved to find a co-star he clicked with, and enjoyed working with. Since she’d left the show, he’d had so many different women try and fill her place, and none of them had stuck around long enough to make things work.

If Emma knew her friend as well as she thought she did, she knew that he would probably be blaming himself for that.

“That’s excellent news, Killian. I really hope that you guys continue getting on so well. You deserve a good friend on that set once more.”

“Does that mean you’re coming back?” he teased with a cheeky wink, and Emma couldn’t help but giggle at it.

“They did ask me back for the two-hundredth episode,” she told him.

The call had come in earlier that week, and Emma hadn’t planned on telling Killian until she knew her schedule a little better. But she couldn’t seem to stop herself from spilling most of her secrets when he offered her that adorably hopeful look.

“I’m hoping I can make it work. I _might_ still be in LA when you film it, if everything goes well next week.”

“It will,” Killian declared resolutely. “I know it will, Ems. And if something does go wrong, well… I’ll just have to lock you in the house until we start filming the episode.”

Emma snorted into her bottle at her friend’s words. He always seemed to know the right thing to say to ease her fears.

When a familiar knock sounded on her trailer door, she groaned a little in frustration. “That’s someone from wardrobe to help me out of this for the last time,” she explained, as she gestured down her body, and dropped the camera to follow her movement.

“Do you um… do you get to keep it?” Killian asked, as he brought a hand up to scratch behind his ear.

Emma’s brow furrowed up a little in confusion. It was a nervous tick of his that she had come to know well. But she had no idea why he’d be worried about asking that question.

“I don’t actually know,” she chuckled. “I can ask, though. Why? Do you need a screen accurate Dream Girl costume for your nerdy shrine to her?”

Killian’s blush only seemed to deepen as he stuttered out, “Yeah. Um… I mean no. I uh… I was just wondering. I ah… I thought it would be a nice reminder of the film… for you.”

The knock sounded once more, ringing out a little louder in the small space, and Emma’s humour was quickly replaced with exasperation.

“I have to go,” she explained. “I’ll call you when I get home?”

“Of course. Talk to you soon, Ems.”

Killian disconnected the line just as Emma called out, “Come in,” to whoever was waiting on the other side of the door.

While Ruby helped her out of the costume for one final time, she couldn’t help but think back to her friend’s last question, and his reaction to her gentle teasing. She wasn’t sure why he’d been so embarrassed by it. It wasn’t like she didn’t already know about his teenaged crush on the comic-book character.

By the time she was back in her jeans and comfy plaid shirt once more, Emma still hadn’t managed to figure it all out.

But that didn’t stop her from asking Ruby if she could keep one of the costumes they had used for filming.


	30. Chapter 29

When Emma’s flight finally touched down in California, she felt like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders once more. As much as she didn’t regret her decision to the leave the show and head back to the East Coast, a part of her had always felt like it belonged in the golden state.

Or maybe it was that a part of her always felt like she belonged by Killian’s side.

Either way, driving her rental over to the house she’d visited all those months before felt like coming home, and Emma was relieved about that. The last thing she’d wanted was for her time in Los Angeles to feel like an imposition to her friend.

As she pulled up to the large gates at the entrance to the small community, her heart began beating a little faster. She knew that Killian wouldn’t be home until later that evening, as he had a full day of filming ahead of himself. But she was looking forward to getting settled in, so that she could start preparing for the upcoming meetings she had the following week.

The security guard handed over a swan keychain, that had a series of silver keys dangling from it, before buzzing her into the community. Emma had to chuckle a little at the small gift Killian had left for her. If she knew him as well as she thought she did, she was willing to bet the swan figurine was made from expensive crystal, and was not just a cheap glass replica.

It took her a moment to recognize her friend’s home as she pulled up to the drive. Killian had either spent time outside working on the place himself, or he’d hired someone to do it for him, as all of the hedges and trees had been trimmed back neatly, and the grass had been freshly cut. The edges of the property were now surrounded by beautifully bright flowers and solar powered lights, adding some character and colour to the dull exterior of the house.

“Wow,” she whispered to herself, as she parked at the end of the drive.

The moment she unlocked the front door to her best friend’s house, she could sense the difference in the space. It wasn’t just the outside that had undergone a makeover since her last visit. The house no longer held that cold and distant feel it had before. Instead of being a place that Killian simply used when he wasn’t working, it had been transformed into his home.

The large hallway now held framed pictures of Killian’s family and herself, along with some quirky pieces of artwork that he’d found to compliment his colour scheme. There were small trinkets on some of the flat surfaces, along with candles and vases containing fresh flowers.

She paused to drop her bags to the floor by the staircase, before carrying on down the hall to the kitchen. Killian had clearly invested more money in the room since her last visit, as there were now a variety of appliances on the countertops, and plenty of food in the cupboards. The wall where his small table sat now had a large clock mounted to it, and a series of black and white images of what looked to be the Irish countryside. Emma would bet good money that they were some he had taken in the past.

But perhaps the best part of the room were the variety of pictures that had been stuck to the front of his refrigerator, clearly drawn by his young nephews. Emma had been so caught up in examining them all that she almost missed the note that had been left on the kitchen counter, with her name written across the front in Killian’s elegant handwriting.

_Ems,_

_WELCOME BACK TO LA!!!_

_Sorry I can’t be here to say that in person, but I promise I won’t be late home._  
_There’s plenty of food here to keep you going until I get back,_  
_And I’ve made up your room for you,_  
_Just incase you wanna take a nap or something._

 _I’m so happy to be sharing my home with you this summer,_  
_So make sure you treat it like it’s yours too!!!_

_See ya soon._

_K_  
_Xoxo_

She chuckled a little at his written words before heading back through to the hall to grab her bags, and haul them upstairs to the room that she’d used the last time she’d come to stay.

But what she found when she pushed open the door was totally unexpected.

What had clearly been a spare and unused room before, had been completely transformed into a wonderful space to relax inside of. Gone were the bare walls and simple cotton bedding, and in its place was a space that she probably would have created for herself, if given the chance.

Killian had upgraded her bed linen to the softest that money could buy, and he’d opted for a cover that was a pure and brilliant white, with butterflies in different shades of red climbing up the design. There was a pair of matching cushions at the head of the bed, and he’d dressed the windows in drapes of the same shade of red as one of the butterflies. A set of drawers had been placed against one wall, and Killian had made sure to leave one of her favourite scented candles on top of it, along with another vase containing Emma’s favourite flowers.

In the corner of the room was a small sofa made from soft white leather, with another set of matching cushions resting in each corner, and a plush looking blanket draped over the back of it. A large floor light had been placed behind the piece, and floating shelves had been added to the wall, which already featured some of Emma’s favourite comfort reads.

And of course, he’d made sure to stock the en-suite bathroom with all of her favourite toiletries too.

She couldn’t quite believe just how much time and effort he’d put into making her room of the house truly feel like _hers_.

Emma Swan really had hit the best friend jackpot.

* * *

Killian was grateful that he had a full day of filming ahead of him on the day Emma was due to fly in to Los Angeles, as it proved to be an effective way to take his mind off his worries.

He’d woken that morning with so many ‘what if?’ questions racing in his mind, that they’d left him feeling dizzy.

_What if she worked out how he felt about her, and couldn’t stand to face him again?_

_What if he couldn’t face her now, knowing that he was in love with her?_

_What if he screwed up and accidentally told her?_

_What if her meetings with the studios went horribly wrong, and she wanted to leave the state immediately?_

_What if they couldn’t live together, like he thought they could?_

_What if she hated the colours he’d painted the walls of her bedroom? Or the carpet he’d picked for her floor?_

It had taken him so long to shake them all off, that he was almost late to set. Thankfully, traffic that morning had been nowhere near as horrendous as it normally was on a Monday morning, and Belle had been waiting just outside of his trailer, with a mug of coffee in hand.

Killian’s new co-star had settled in well with the team, and for the first time in years, he had found himself enjoying the scenes he shot with his fellow lead. There was no awkward flirting to avoid, or rookie mistakes being made. Belle had proved to be a complete professional when the cameras were rolling.

As had become their routine, Killian joined her for lunch that afternoon, and the two of them spent their time discussing how their weekends had gone, and the plans they had for the upcoming shoots still left on the schedule for that day. It reminded him so much of those early days with the network, and how Emma had taken him under her wing, that it would have been painful without the knowledge that his best friend was probably already on her way back to his house.

“When does Emma’s flight land?” Belle asked, almost as if she knew where her co-star’s mind had wandered to.

“It should have landed at eleven, but she hasn’t messaged me yet.” Killian had been obsessively checking his phone for the last hour to make sure he hadn’t missed a notification at all. “It’s either delayed, or she packed half of her wardrobe and is busy unpacking it all.”

“It’s probably the wardrobe thingy,” Belle teased. “For a stay that long, I’d have packed up my entire place.”

Killian snorted into his sandwich before he took another bite. But as he was chewing, another thought suddenly occurred to him.

_What if Emma thought that all of those pictures of her that he’d hung around the house were a little creepy, and she had decided to find her own place to stay?_

“Are you guys gonna be doing anything this weekend to celebrate her return?”

“I honestly have no idea,” Killian told his friend, as he began to worry some more.

_Would Emma have expected him to make plans for her return?_

_Would she even want him to?_

“Emma’s normally the planner out of the two of us, but I think she just wants to focus on these meetings she has ahead of her.”

“That makes sense.” Belle didn’t know what the meetings were for, but she knew that anytime she had some planned in Hollywood, she needed time to prepare herself for them. “I’m sure she’ll message you soon.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

The two of them sat in silence for a moment, just enjoying the rest of their meal. It wasn’t the awkward kind of silence that Killian had become used to on set, over the past few years. Instead, it was something easy and relaxing, just like Belle’s presence had been since the two of them had first met.

“Well, if you’re not busy this weekend, you guys could always come over to my place for dinner?” she suggested, just as Killian had finished eating. “My husband loves to cook, and we don’t have many friends in this part of the country right now, so I’m sure he’d appreciate making some new ones.”

“That uh… that actually sounds really good.” Killian hadn’t been to a dinner party since he’d left his wife. Attending one at Belle’s home, with Emma by his side, sounded like the perfect way to get back into that side of his social life, that he’d been missing greatly since the separation. “I’ll check with Emma and make sure that she hasn’t got anything planned for the weekend, as she has a habit of surprising me. But if she has, maybe we could reschedule for another time?”

“I’m definitely holding you to that, Killian Jones. Now… how about we head over to my trailer and run through this next scene once last time, before we have to be back on set?”

Killian was already stood and following his friend from the room, before she’d finished speaking.

* * *

Emma’s message finally came in just as they were making their way back to set.

For a moment, Killian was far too distracted by the beautiful image of herself that she’d sent, to read the words attached to it

“Ah, she found the pool,” Belle teased, as she peered over her friend’s shoulder to see what had caused him to stop moving

“Yeah… uh… she um, she was rather disappointed that I had forgot to mention it the last time she visited,” he chuckled awkwardly, reaching up to scratch that embarrassed itch that had formed behind his right ear.

Emma had clearly been busy making herself at home since she had arrived, as the picture she’d sent him was of the top half of her body, clad only in a black and white stripped; halter neck bikini top, emerging from the water. She had a pair of tortoise shell sunglasses perched on top of her head, and her long blonde hair fell in soft waves over her left shoulder.

She looked absolutely stunning, and Killian was starting to panic once more.

How the hell was he going to get through the summer with her in his home, looking _that_ fucking good?

“Was she unpacking?” Belle asked, obviously completely unaware of her friend’s small panic attack as she continued walking beside him.

“Huh?”

“Emma. Was she delayed or unpacking?”

“Oh, um…” he dropped his eyes back down to the message to read the words that were attached to it, and relaxed a little as he did. They were just so typically Emma, that it helped to remind him of how little their friendship had changed since his big revelation.

And it gave him the hope that things would work out between the two of them, when he finally saw her again.

**Honey, I’m home ;-)**

**I’ll be right here waiting for you with snacks and wine!**

**See you soon.**

**E**  
**Xoxo**

“I think she’s just been enjoying the amenities,” he chuckled, as he quickly locked the device and stuffed it back into his pocket.

“I can’t say I blame her,” Belle giggled.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Emma's look at the end of this chapter is based on Jen's look for a Vanity Fair photoshoot in 2011**


	31. Chapter 30

“Ems? Are you here?” Killian called out softly, as he pushed his way into the house later that evening. His stomach was twisting in on itself, but he couldn’t tell if that was because he was excited, or because he was nervous to finally be reunited with her.

When there was no reply from inside the house, Killian sat the fresh flowers he’d brought home with him down on the table in the hall, to pull off his jacket, before making his way through the house towards the doors that would lead outside. It didn’t take him long to spot his friend, and when he did, his stomach fluttered once more.

She’d clearly abandoned the pool at some point, as Emma was now stretched out over one of the recliners on the deck, reading a dog-eared book. But she was still wearing that navy and white stripped bikini that had been the focus of her picture earlier that day, and she’d added a navy wrap that circled her hips.

_God, she was so beautiful. How had he never realized that before?_

Killian took a moment just to steel his nerves, before he pushed open the door to call the words from her message back to her.

“Honey, I’m home!”

Emma sprung up from her spot on the lounger, pushing her sunglasses up on top of her head to turn in his direction. “Killian,” she sighed, before she threw herself into his arms. “God, it’s so good to see you again.”

He tightened his grip around her waist, holding her tightly for a moment longer than necessary as he buried his face into her hair. She smelled like cocoa and vanilla, and warmth and comfort.

“I missed you,” he breathed out softly.

“I missed you too,” she chuckled, as she pulled back to get a good look at her friend. “You look good, Killian. Really good. Like something’s changed inside of you.”

“I uh… I dunno about that,” he chuckled, as he reached up to scratch nervously behind his ear.

But Emma caught his hand in her own before he could.

“You took it off?” she asked, looking down at her best friend’s bare hand for the very first time since they’d met.

“Yeah. It uh… it seemed like the right thing to do. I thought it would feel weird, you know? But it doesn’t. It um… it feels right.”

“I’m proud of you, Killian,” she told him, before leaning up to brush a soft kiss to his cheek. “Now, why don’t you come and sit down, and tell me about everything I’ve missed since I’ve been gone?”

Killian chuckled heartily as he let her pull him over to the recliner she’d been stretched out across, when he’d first arrived home. He carefully took a seat at one end of it, while his friend took her place opposite him.

“Let me see… filming’s going well. Belle’s been really fun to work with. She’s not quite as outgoing as Ashley was, but she’s not shy or standoffish either. She actually reminds me a little of you,” he chuckled, before adding, “Oh! That reminds me - she invited us over for dinner this weekend, if you haven’t already made plans? She doesn’t have many friends here, and I know you two would get along well.”

“This weekend?” Emma asked, trying hard to keep the pitch of her voice as even as she could. “I um… I was kinda hoping that it would just be the two of us this weekend.”

She didn’t really know how to explain to Killian that she didn’t much fancy seeing the chemistry he shared with his new co-star in person. But she also didn’t want to stop him from making more friends of his own. Emma knew just how isolated he’d become since his split with Milah, and she’d hate to be the person who kept him feeling that way.

“That’s okay,” he assured her. “I can let Belle know that we have plans. We can always go over the following weekend? I hear that her husband’s an excellent cook.”

“Husband?” Emma’s head shot up to look at her friend, and her entire body relaxed once more as the word _husband_ echoed through her mind.

_Of course Belle was married. Why hadn’t she thought of that?_

“Yeah. I don’t think he’s part of the industry,” Killian explained. “But I’m told that he’s a great cook. So if you feel up to making some new friends soon, I can let her know that we’d love to visit one weekend?”

“I am definitely up for that. But _after_ this weekend. I really just wanna curl up on the sofa here with you, and spend some time catching up with my best friend while we try and forget about those meetings I have next week.”

Her face paled a little at the thought of them. Emma knew that they would probably become the defining moment of her entire career, and the last thing she wanted to do was mess them up.

“Hey, none of that now,” he chided gently, as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders to pull her into his side. “You’re going to kick arse in those negotiations, Emma. The studios are going to be fighting for the rights to that script. And in ten years’ time, you’ll be one of the most sought after screenwriters in the industry.”

“You have an awful lot of faith in me there, Jones.”

“Of course I do. I know what you’re capable of when you put your mind to it, Emma. Nothing’s unattainable for you, Love.”

“Thank you. I really wish you could be there with me for them.”

“Isn’t your lawyer joining you?” Killian asked, as he pulled back to look down at her.

He knew that the script was her baby, but he also knew that it was always best to have lawyers with you for any kind of negotiation that took place in Hollywood. It was surprising how often studios tried to slip in clauses that would end up screwing over a party to that contract.

He’d certainly learned that lesson the hard way.

“Yeah. But I’d feel better having a friendly face in there with me too, you know?”

Killian nodded his head sadly, because he really did know how that felt. The confidence that came from looking at someone who truly believed in you was invaluable. But there was absolutely no way that he’d have the time to sneak away from set to make that happen for her.

“I might not be able to be there for you in person, Ems, but you know I’ll be there with you in spirit. And I’ll need you to call me as soon as it’s over, to tell me how it went.”

“You’ve got yourself a deal there, Jones.”

* * *

After taking a brief shower and changing into a pair of jeans and a simple shirt, Emma made her way through to the kitchen to help her friend with the dinner preparations for that evening.

“Have you been learning to cook?” she asked, as she leaned around him to get a good look at what was happening on the stove.

While Killian wasn’t normally a massive fan of shellfish, he knew how much Emma loved paella, so he’d downloaded a few recipes to try his hand at. The one he was preparing that evening was the easiest he’d found to work with, and also the best tasting, in his honest opinion.

“Maybe a little,” he shrugged. “I just hope that you’ll enjoy it as much as I do.”

“Well, if it tastes as good as it smells, I know I will. Now, is there anything I can do to help?” She glanced around the kitchen to see what was waiting to be done, but it looked like while she’d been busy upstairs, Killian had finished all of his prep work downstairs.

“You can split the rest of that bottle of wine between two glasses, if you want?” He nodded his head in the direction of the open bottle, and Emma chuckled a little as she turned to reach for the cabinet that she knew he kept his glassware inside of.

After placing a glass on the counter beside her friend, Emma took a seat at the kitchen island with her own to watch as he finished cooking their meal for them. “Did you uh… did you see where I left the mail?” she asked, as she pulled Killian’s next script towards herself to flick through.

Emma hated to admit that she hadn’t kept up with the show since leaving it. But if she was being brutally honest, she’d also have to admit that she never really had. The novelty of headlining a massive procedural show had worn off quickly, and after the second season, she’d stopped recording the episodes to watch at a later date. After all, with the amount of time it took to film an episode, she already knew the show better than most of the viewers did.

And while she’d had every intention of recording the episodes after she’d left, so that she could continue to support her friend, she’d been far too busy travelling the world to actually sit and watch any of them.

“Nope,” Killian replied, as he threw a quick look at her over his shoulder, before his gaze landed on the small stack of envelopes beside the fruit bowl. “Does anything look important?”

Emma pulled everything back in her direction as she quickly flicked through the postmarks and return addresses on the envelopes. Nothing seemed noteworthy, until she got to the penultimate one in the pile.

“There um… there’s a letter here from the Los Angeles family court,” she told him, as she pulled it out to hold between her hands.

Killian turned his attention away from where he’d been busy plating up their dinner, to stare in Emma’s direction. A moment of tense silence seemed to hang between the two of them, before he finally turned back to the counter to finish what he’d been doing.

When he slid a plate down in front of his friend, and then placed another adjacent to hers without a word, Emma offered him a curious glance.

“It can wait,” he told her, before picking up his glass and raising it for a toast. “To finally being reunited with my best friend,” he offered.

Emma smiled despite the situation as she lifted her own glass to echo his sentiment. After taking a small sip of the wine, she placed it back down to turn her attention to the mouthwatering meal that Killian had cooked for her that day.

“Oh my God,” she moaned, as she slipped the first forkful into her mouth. “This is amazing, Killian.”

She was so busy savoring the flavors exploding on her tongue, that Emma completely missed the way her friend shifted a little awkwardly in his seat, at the sounds of her pleasure.

* * *

“That was fantastic, Jones. You’ve definitely been holding out on me,” Emma teased, as she finished sliding the last of the plates into the dishwasher, ready to turn on later that evening.

“That’s _literally_ the only thing I’ve learned to cook for you,” he pointed out. “So unless you wanna live off paella for the rest of the summer, I might need your help every once in a while.”

“I dunno, paella every day sounds incredibly tempting right now.” Emma reached for another bottle of wine and their glasses, before she nodded her head to the envelope that had sat ominously on the table between them, while they’d eaten. “Do you wanna open that in the lounge while we share another?”

“God yes,” he sighed, snatching it up from the table to follow her out of the room.

Emma made herself comfortable on the sofa as she topped up both of their glasses, while Killian took his time to drop down into the seat beside hers. He knew that the envelope could only contain one of two things, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about facing either of them at that moment in time.

“You don’t have to do this right now if you don’t want to,” Emma told him, as she reached over to cover his hand with one of her own.

“It’s okay. I’m done letting this control my life,” he explained, as he tore into the envelope to pull out the pages tucked inside of it.

Emma sat quietly as her friend briefly skimmed through the first couple, before placing them aside to stare down at the last piece of paper that had been included in the packet.

“Is that…?”

“Yeah,” he answered. “It’s my divorce certificate.”

Emma bit down gently on her bottom lip to stop herself from asking dozens of pointless questions, as Killian continued to stare at the page in his hands. When he’d been silent for a moment too long, she allowed herself to ask, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I just… It feels a little anti-climactic,” Killian chuckled bitterly.

“What do you mean?”

“I dunno. I guess… I just expected to feel _more_ when I finally had this. But I don’t. I mean, this doesn’t really tell me anything that I didn’t already know. It doesn’t feel like it’s the end of my marriage, like I thought it would.”

“Maybe that’s because you’ve already had the closure that you thought this would give to you?” she suggested.

Killian mumbled something in reply, but it was so quiet that Emma couldn’t really hear it.

“Well, at least you can get married again now,” she teased, nudging his shoulder gently with her own, as she tried to lighten the atmosphere in the room. “Do you um… do you think you ever would?”

“Ever would what?” he asked, finally pulling his eyes away from the piece of paper in his hands, to meet hers.

“Do you think you’d ever want to get married again? I know a few divorcees who swear they never would. But I just realized that I have no idea where you sit on the subject.”

Killian’s gut reaction was to say no. He had no intention of marrying again after the mockery that Milah had made of their vows.

Until an image of Emma appeared in his mind.

Milah had preferred the big, princess type wedding ceremony when they’d gotten married, all those years before. There had been hundreds of people packed into a church, to watch as she’d said her vows wearing a big dress made from enough tulle to sink a ship.

But Emma… Emma would opt for something simpler. She might be an actress by trade, but Killian knew that she wouldn’t enjoy a huge church service, where she was the centre of attention. She’d prefer something more intimate, with just her closest family and friends there to celebrate the love she shared, with the man she was marrying.

_And God, she would look stunning doing so._

Killian didn’t know much about fashion, but he knew Emma.

He was certain that she would opt for something that was sleeker. Something simple, yet timelessly elegant. She certainly wouldn’t want a big princess gown, that she’d probably spend all day feeling inconvenienced by.

As he continued to picture Emma making her way down the aisle to say her vows, Killian knew that there was really only one answer to her question that night.

“For the right person, I would,” he whispered quietly, as he sat the page down onto the coffee table, and sank back into the sofa cushions.


	32. Chapter 31

“Emma!” Killian called our frantically, as he rushed through the front door, leaving it wide open in his haste to find his friend. “Emma! Where are you?”

“Up here,” came her muffled reply, but his legs were already propelling him up the stairs in search of his best friend. When he found her she was sat in the middle of her bed, with a dejected look on her face.

“What happened?” he asked, as he flew to her side. His hands moved to her face, tilting it up so that her eyes would meet his, before he dropped his gaze down her body in search of injury.

“I don’t know what to wear,” she sighed, her eyes filling with tears once more. “I don’t think I can do this, Killian. I’m an actress. I’m not a screenwriter. And I’m certainly not a negotiator. I mean, what do I even wear for this thing? I want something that will make them take me seriously, but everything feels wrong. It makes me feel like a complete fraud. Because that’s what I am right now. I’m a fraud, Killian. I’m an actress pretending to be something that I’m not.”

“That’s it?” Killian’s tone was coloured with his disbelief, which sparked fire in his best friend’s glare.

“Oh, I’m sorry that my small career crisis isn’t _big_ enough for you,” she snapped. But when she opened her mouth to follow up with something else, Killian lifted his hand to cover it, effectively silencing her rant.

“Emma, you sent me a message that read, ‘911. I need you. Come home as soon as you can.’ I thought something terrible had happened to you. I rushed out of my trailer and broke every speed limit between here and the lot, just to get to you. I thought you were hurt, or in danger, or something equally as horrifying. So yeah, ‘that’s it’ seems to fit the situation perfectly right now.”

A part of him wanted to kiss her with the relief currently flooding through his system, while the other part wanted to lecture her for making him worry. But Killian knew that his friend didn’t need either of his reactions while she was currently obsessing over the meeting she had later that day.

So he took a deep breath to try and clear his mind, before dropping down to sit beside her. “Look, Emma… I know you’re scared. But trust me when I say that you have absolutely nothing to worry about right now.” When she opened her mouth to protest again, Killian simply raised a brow to silence her. “You’re not a fraud, okay? Making this leap is a huge deal for _anyone_ , Ems. It’s an even bigger deal when you have the kind of reputation that _you_ already have in this town. But Lionsgate Films and Sony Pictures… they wouldn’t have even asked for these meetings if they didn’t _want_ your script. Your lawyer is there to do all of the hard work for you. That’s what you pay him for. So let _him_ make all of your demands and do all the negotiating for you. Let him answer the tough questions. You just need to focus on being _you_ , and selling that script to them for the highest goddamned price you can get. Okay?”

Emma crumpled forward into her friend’s waiting arms as all of the fight seemed to drain from her body. She’d spent most of the night wide awake, running through every ‘what if’ scenario that her mind could conjure up, for the two meetings she had scheduled that week. Every single one had been worse than the situation that came before it, until eventually, she’d fallen asleep just as the sun had begun to rise.

“I still don’t know what to wear,” she mumbled into his chest.

Killian chuckled a little as he tightened his arms around her back. “I’m absolutely no use when it comes to fashion advice. But… I think I might know someone who could help us.”

He shifted around a little awkwardly until he could fish his phone out of his pocket, and quickly pulled up the app to check the time in Ireland, before scrolling through his contacts. When he found his sister-in-law’s number he hit the button to begin a Facetime call with her, and then released Emma from his arms.

“Hey, Killian,” Anna greeted. “The boys are already in bed, if you were calling to chat with them.”

“Actually, I wanted to speak with you,” he told her. “Emma’s having a bit of a fashion crisis right now, and she could use some advice from someone who knows what they’re talking about. Do you have some time to chat?”

“Absolutely,” she assured him. “Let me just head into the kitchen and out of Liam’s way. He’s watching… some kind of sport.”

“It’s rugby,” his brother called back loudly, as Anna made her escape and into a quiet room of the house.

“So, what are the options?” she asked, pulling a bottle of wine from the fridge to sit down onto the breakfast bar, before she started searching her cupboards for a clean glass.

“I think that’s my cue to leave,” Killian chuckled, as he handed the phone over to Emma, who was already on her feet and headed for her small closet. “I need to get back to work, anyway. Do you think you could detour that way and drop my phone in to me before your meeting?”

“Do you want it back now?” Emma worried. “I can call Anna from mine.”

“It’s fine,” he assured her. “I won’t be able to use it on set anyway, so it’s not like I’m gonna miss it any time soon. Just… don’t break it. It took me long enough to learn how to use that one. I’m not ready for an upgrade yet.”

“You’re such an old man,” his best friend teased, as he leaned in to brush a kiss to the top of her head. “I’m sorry I worried you earlier.”

“Don’t be. Just… promise you won’t ever do that to me again? It was probably the worst twenty minutes of my entire life.” Killian chuckled a little as he squeezed her hand affectionately, to show that there were no hard feelings. But Emma could see that hint of worry in the corner of his eyes, as he thought back to earlier that morning, when her message had come through. She hated that she’d been the one to worry him that way.

“Talk to you soon, Anna,” Killian called out a little louder, giving Emma’s hand one final squeeze before he let go to head for the door.

“You too, Killian,” his sister-in-law yelled back.

* * *

While Killian returned to set to finish shooting the scenes scheduled for that day, Anna and Emma made their way through every piece of clothing that she had brought out to Los Angeles with her, pairing different items together until they found a few outfits that they liked the most.

“Try the black one,” Anna suggested, as she watched her friend strip out of the red pant suit that she’d been wearing only moments before. While it definitely fit the requirements for Emma’s meeting that afternoon, it wasn’t really _Emma_ , and Anna knew that the perfect look for her friend would be the one that truly showcased her personality.

“I knew I should have gone shopping yesterday,” the blonde mumbled, as she slipped the dress off its hanger, to pull down and over her head.

“With Killian? I know you guys are close but… seriously? He’s the _worst_ person in the world to ask for fashion advice. He basically lives in the same five outfits.”

“Did you know that he has twelve pairs of the same kind of jeans?” Emma giggled, as the memory of that particular shopping trip came back to her. “When he heard that they were being discontinued he bought every pair the store had in his size, so that he wouldn’t have to find a new brand he liked.”

Anna snorted over the line as she reached for the half-empty bottle of wine, to top up her glass. While she hadn’t expected to spend her evening the way she was, she had to admit that she was having a lot of fun catching up with Emma, between outfit changes. The time difference between Los Angeles and Ireland often made it tough for the two of them to find time to physically talk to each other, between their daily commitments. But both women were starting to realize that this was something they needed to do more often.

They’d missed the friendship that they shared across the ocean.

“Nope. That’s _far_ too tight. It looks stunning on you, but it’s too sexy,” Anna pointed out, as she watched her friend smooth a hand down her figure.

Emma sighed loudly while she reached for the zip once more. She really wished that she could join Anna and pour herself a glass of wine right then. But showing up tipsy to one of the biggest meetings of her life certainly wouldn’t go down well, even if it might help to calm her nerves a little.

“Which one should I try next?” she asked, as she wrestled the dress over her head, before tossing it onto the discarded pile on her bed. She’d clean everything up later, when she had more time to worry about the mess. And it wasn’t like she was leaving her clothes strewn all over the living space she had to share with Killian. Emma knew all too well how her friend felt about clutter and disorder.

“Uh… try the blue,” Anna suggested, as she scanned what was left of the small pile they had agreed upon. There were only three dresses there, and she _really_ hoped that one of them would end up working for Emma, because her friend was certainly running out of time to get anything else sorted.

Emma didn’t look terribly hopeful as she slid it off the hanger and unzipped the dress, before pulling it down and over her head.

“You know… I bet if we had told the guys that fashion advice would result in me seeing more of you in your underwear than I _ever_ had before, they’d suddenly take an interest in the subject,” Anna blurted out, as she tried hard to lift the other woman’s spirits.

Emma barked out a laugh while she reached behind her for the zip, but both women were already shaking their heads to the look before she had it fully done up.

“Ugh. I’m gonna have to go back to the pant suit, aren’t I?” she asked, before adding the dress to the growing pile on her bed. “And I doubt that even the prospect of seeing me in my underwear would convince either of the men in our lives to help with this. Liam’s like a brother to me, and I’m pretty sure that as far as Killian’s concerned, I’m just a friend who happens to have a womanly shape.”

Anna snorted into her glass once more while she watched her friend reach for the next dress on the pile. “If you really think that, you’re probably not spending enough time with Killian,” she mumbled.

“Huh?” Emma turned back to face the small screen as she smoothed her hands down over the fabric now covering her body. But Anna had completely forgotten what they were talking about.

“That’s it,” she yelled, a little too enthusiastically, given that her children were in bed trying to sleep. “That’s the one!”

“Really?”

Looking down at herself, Emma wasn’t entirely sold on the look. But at the other woman’s emphatic nod, she picked up the small device to wander through to her bathroom, and the full-length mirror that now hung in there. Killian had clearly added it to the room in anticipation of her visit, as it was mounted at the perfect height for her body shape.

While the dress that Anna had chosen for her was a sleeveless design, it was one of the longer ones that Emma owned, dropping down to just below her knees, as it hugged her curves perfectly. The burnt orange colour worked well with her skin tone, in a way that Anna could only sit back and envy, while the purple branch detailing that ran up and down the gown added that touch of style that Emma was well known for.

It was one of those dresses that definitely looked better on her, than it did on the hanger.

“See?” Anna asked, as she watched her friend take in her reflection, twisting a little to get a look at as much of herself as she could.

“Okay. Maybe you’re right.”

“Ugh, don’t tell her that,” Liam interrupted. His wife span the camera around a little so that Emma could watch him make his way into the kitchen to grab a drink, before he turned back around to head over to Anna’s side. “I’ll never hear the end of it now.”

“Hush you,” Emma chided. “Your wife’s been very helpful to me this afternoon. Thank you, Anna.”

“I am _always_ here for impromptu dress-up sessions. Now… don’t take this the wrong way, but aren’t you gonna be late if you don’t get a move on soon?”

“Yeah, I am,” Emma agreed, as she checked the time on her screen. She’d been on the phone for much longer than either of them had expected. “Thanks again, Anna. I promise I’ll call you when I have some news. Or text, if it’s really late.”

“Good luck, Ems. We love you, and we believe in you.”

Her friends sent waves and blew kisses over the connection, before they ended the call to allow Emma the time that she would need to finish getting ready for her first meeting with Lionsgate Films.

After pulling her hair back into a textured bun and slipping her feet into a pair of purple suede heels, Emma grabbed a black trench coat from its place on the rack beside the front door. She slipped her phone into one of the pockets, and Killian’s into the other, before she rushed out to the car that she’d leased for her time spent on the West Coast.

Getting to the lot that her friend was filming in was easy enough. It was a drive that Emma had made for over half a decade, and the guys who worked the gate still recognized her. But she didn’t want to just leave Killian’s phone in his trailer for him to find when he returned, and she also didn’t want to interrupt his day any further. So after hesitating for a moment, she made her way through to the studio that was currently in use, hoping that she’d find someone trustworthy to leave the device with.

It didn’t take her long to realize that filming was currently in progress, and it took her even less time to spot her best friend, bent over the set they had always used for filming scenes in the morgue. Emma smiled softly at the people around her as she carefully and quietly edged her way forward, until she had an unobstructed view of Killian, and the brunette stood just beside him.

She recognized Belle French easily enough from the Google search she’d done after her tweet, but Emma didn’t pay the new girl much attention that afternoon. Instead, all of her focus was on the guy that was clearly the centre of the entire scene.

Killian had come a long way since he’d first joined the show, almost a decade ago. Watching him film without her was a wakeup call in that respect. Not only was his acting now much better than it had been before, along with the American accent that he was asked to fake for his FBI role, but his presence in front of the camera had changed too. He seemed to command the space around him, filling it with his charisma even when the cameras weren’t filming his coverage.

And it was so wonderful for her to see.

Emma had no doubts in her mind that he was the perfect person to play Officer Andrews in her movie, and she was sure that if she could convince Killian to audition for the role, the studios would agree with her.

Of course, it helped that his newfound love for spending time at the gym had given him the perfect body for the part too. The simple black suit that he was wearing looked _incredible_ on him. Emma knew that it was probably only a generic piece, that could be replaced easily and cheaply if something happened to it during filming. But Killian wore the suit like he was ready to walk a runway. And she was certain his fans were loving how his wardrobe now seemed to enhance his much bulkier figure.

“Emma?”

She startled a little at the sound of her name. Emma had been so lost in her mind that she hadn’t realized cut had been called, or that her friend had spotted her.

“Are you okay? Did Anna…?”

“She was a fantastic help,” Emma assured him. “Thank you for calling her for me. I uh… I just wanted to bring your phone back.” She sunk her hand into the left pocket of the trench coat she was wearing and withdrew the small device to offer it out in his direction.

“You could have left it in my trailer,” Killian chuckled. “Aren’t you gonna be cutting things fine now with traffic?”

“I Uh…” Emma flicked her glance over to the large clock on the wall, and swore loudly when she realized that the flashing red numbers showed she’d been watching Killian work for over thirty minutes.

“Go,” he instructed, pointing in the direction of the exit. Which really wasn’t helping to motivate her to leave in that moment, as the jacket he was wearing tightened deliciously around his upper arm, showing just how much muscle was now hiding underneath it.

“Yes, Sir,” she teased, giving herself a little shake to clear her mind. Emma rocked forward on her toes to brush a light kiss over his cheek, before she spun on her heels to head back to her car.

“Call me when you finish,” he yelled after her, drawing the attention of the crew in the studio. “And good luck! Not that I think you’ll need it.”

Emma turned back to face him, offering Killian a small smile of thanks, before she disappeared around the corner and out of his view.

“So… that’s Emma, huh?” Belle asked, as she moved to stand beside her co-star.

“Yeah. That’s Emma.”

“I’ve seen some of her work before. She’s much more beautiful in real life than she is on screen.”

“Yeah. She is,” he agreed on a whisper, as he finally tore his eyes away from the exit of the building, to face the woman currently stood next to him.

“And uh… how long have you been in love with her?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Emma's look here is based on Jen's look for the Disney ABC Television Group's TCA 2001 Summer Press Tour**


	33. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Happy Holidays, Everyone.**

“Wha… what are you talking about?” Killian asked, as he turned to head back to his chair, while they waited for the call to return to set.

“It’s okay. I’m not gonna tell anyone,” Belle assured him. “But you should probably tell Emma how you feel.”

Killian felt the tension drain out of his shoulders at his friend’s words. Pretending that he didn’t have feelings for Emma was exhausting. Especially when she was living under his roof. While he wouldn’t trade their current arrangement for anything in the world, he had found himself constantly second guessing his words and actions around her, hoping that he wouldn’t say or do anything to push her away. Being able to drop the act, even if just for a few hours, felt liberating.

“She doesn’t feel the same way,” he argued. “I’m not ruining almost a decade of friendship over this stupid crush. It’ll pass.” Even as he said the words, Killian knew that they were a lie. The more he thought about his feelings for Emma, the more he realized how long they’d been a part of him.

And how deep they ran.

“So you’re just gonna, what…? Be miserable for the rest of your life?”

“I’m not miserable,” he protested. Because while the thought of never holding Emma the way he’d dreamed about stung, he certainly wasn’t as miserable as he had been, when he’d first left Milah. “I’d be miserable without her in my life though,” he added, as a quiet afterthought. Although, the way Belle’s face fell told him that he probably hadn’t been as quiet as he should have been.

“Don’t you think she deserves to know? I mean… how do you know that she doesn’t feel the same way, without asking her?”

“I’m sure she’d have said something sooner if she did.”

“Not when you were married, she wouldn’t.”

Belle reached over to lay a reassuring hand on her friend’s arm, as he turned away from her. She didn’t want to drive a wedge between the two of them, especially when they’d been getting along so well. But she’d seen Killian’s feelings written all over his face, the moment his eyes had landed on Emma that afternoon. It was astonishing to her that nobody else seemed to have made the connection that she had.

“Look, you don’t have to say anything if you really don’t want to,” she told him. “But I think you should consider it, Killian. Because you’re just going to make yourself miserable if you don’t. I mean, what are you gonna do when someone else comes along and snaps her up?”

She gave his arm another gentle squeeze before standing from her seat to head over to the bathroom. It was Belle’s way of giving her friend some time to process her words, without her hanging around. Because she knew that if the situation had been reversed, she’d have wanted some time away from him to clear her mind, before they returned to set.

While Belle was gone, Killian pulled out his phone to fire off a quick message of support to Emma. But he froze when he noticed the lock screen on the device.

Since his return from Ireland, he had been using a picture of himself with his nephews, that his father had taken during one of their days out. But the image staring back at him was one of himself with his arms wrapped around Emma, at the top of the Statue of Liberty. He slid his hand over the screen so that his thumb rested on the home button, and then pressed down to unlock the device. But when the phone vibrated with the message _try again_ , Killian’s heart lurched a little in his chest.

“Oh God, no,” he whispered, as he tapped in the six-digit code he knew that Emma always used for her own phone. When the login screen flew up to reveal her home display, his heart sank. “Oh fuck.”

“What’s wrong?” Belle worried, sinking down nervously into her seat.

“This isn’t my phone,” Killian replied slowly, while his eyes moved over the screen, taking in the image hidden behind Emma’s selection of apps. It was the picture he’d sent her all those months before, of himself stretched out over her bed in New York.

“Then whose phone is it?”

“It’s Emma’s,” he explained, as his finger hovered over her messaging service. He wanted to pull the app up and send her a message to explain what had happened. But his mind was busy telling him that there was a small chance that Emma didn’t know, and he’d be able to switch the phones over again before she found out.

“Okay. And that’s a bad thing because…”

“Because she’ll see what’s on it,” Killian huffed, as he turned to face his friend. “I… there are pictures of her on there. In the pool. She posed for most of them, and she sent me the rest, so I’m not some creepy perv,” he added hastily, at the look that crossed Belle’s face. “But they’re… not exactly family friendly. And then there’s messages… to my sister-in-law. She knows, Belle. Oh God, Anna knows how I feel about Emma! What if she messages her about it, thinking she’s messaging me? Fuck my life!”

This was not how he’d ever imagined explaining his feelings for his best friend.

“Hey, maybe she won’t notice,” Belle soothed. “I mean, she has her big meeting this afternoon, right? So she’s probably gonna be too focused on that to even look at her - I mean _your_ \- phone. And even if she did, I’m sure the moment that she realized it was yours, she’d slip it back into her pocket and leave it alone. Emma doesn’t strike me as the snooping type.”

Killian dropped his head down to rest against the back of his chair as he screwed his eyes shut.

God he hoped that Belle was right.

The last thing he needed was for Emma to work out how he felt about her, because of his choice of image for his home screen.

* * *

“Relax, Emma. Everything’s going to be okay,” Archie reasoned, as he watched his client’s leg bounce restlessly against the floor. She’d been a complete ball of nerves when she’d arrived at the offices, but somehow, she’d gotten impossibly worse as the minutes had ticked by, while they waited to be called into the conference room at the end of the hall.

“That’s easy enough for you to say,” she mumbled. “You’ll still have an impeccable reputation when this is all over.”

“And so will you,” Archie countered. “They’re already interested in your work, Emma. You wouldn’t be here if they weren’t. So just relax, and remember to let me do all of the talking.”

Emma nodded her agreement, but with every minute longer they waited her nerves and doubts grew, until she felt like she’d burst with the emotions brewing inside of her.

“Miss Swan? We’re ready for you now,” Janice called out, as she swept her arm in the direction of the open conference room door.

Emma swallowed down the bile rising in the back of her throat as she threw Archie a nervous glance, before standing up and smoothing a hand over her dress. In the time that it took for her to make the short walk down the hall, she had completely transformed the look on her face from worried sick, to confident and calm business woman. Because even if she didn’t feel that way on the inside, Emma at least hoped that she could act that way on the outside.

“Miss Swan, Mr Hopper, welcome to Lionsgate Films.”

Emma waited for her lawyer to shake hands with the men gathered around the large table, before she offered each of them her own. She was proud of the way she was able to keep her hand steady, but she didn’t want to risk exposing her nerves so soon, so she quickly dropped down into her designated seat, opposite the executives.

Mr. Friedman went around the room to introduce everyone that had joined them that afternoon, detailing the different departments they worked for in the company, while Emma did her best to try and commit the right names to the right faces, in her mind. She got a little distracted when she noticed the copies of her script that were sat in the middle of the table, however. She hadn’t been expecting that.

“We’ll get right to it, Miss Swan,” Mr Friedman said, startling her attention back to him, as he turned his gaze her way. He reached for the script sat on top of the pile, and quickly leafed through it before he declared, “We loved it. There are some small alterations we’d like to make to the overall story, in order to give it that missing touch we feel would elevate the piece to a whole new level. But we would definitely like to make you an offer this afternoon. The aim of this meeting today is to try and hammer out some of the details to make a collaboration between yourself and our company possible. I’m sure we’ll all be able to come to an agreement on how best to make that work.”

Emma opened her mouth to offer her thanks to Mr Friedman, but Archie beat her to it. “Miss Swan will be unable to make any kind of commitment to your company this afternoon. You’re not the only studio in Hollywood to have shown an interest in her piece, and as you can imagine, she’d like to get the best possible deal before she signs anything.”

“Of course,” Friedman agreed, although Emma noticed that the team around him became a flurry of activity, shuffling papers around in front of them while their leader pressed on. “We’re obviously hopeful that our offer will be enough to sway Miss Swan into choosing our company, but we respect her need to give the other studios the same chance that she’s giving to us.”

“Thank you.”

Archie shot Emma a small smile before he turned his attention back to the executives sat opposite them. Janice seemed to take that as her cue to move, as she made her way around the table, handing out a copy of the company’s proposal as she went, starting with Emma and her attorney.

Friedman gave the two of them a moment to flick through the key terms that had been set out in the agreement, while Janice finished and made her way back to her seat. When the room was silent once more, he pulled out a red pen and turned a warm smile in Emma’s direction.

“Let’s get these negotiations started, shall we? We don’t want to waste too much of your time, Miss Swan. I hear you have a Spielberg piece to prepare for.”

Emma chuckled nervously as her eyes continued scanning the pages in front of her.

She hadn’t expected so many terms to be attached to the sale of her script. She was suddenly incredibly grateful to have Archie by her side, because at least he seemed to know what he was doing.

* * *

Killian was a little surprised to return home later that evening to an empty house. He’d been sure that Emma would be done with her meeting by the time they’d wrapped for the day. But after double checking that she wasn’t making use of his pool once more, he quickly realized that he was alone in his home.

Again.

He grabbed a drink from the kitchen and then dropped down heavily onto the sofa, as he fished Emma’s phone out of his pocket. She’d gotten a few messages while he’d been filming, mainly from her parents and his family, wishing her luck that afternoon. But Killian hadn’t opened any of them. The last thing he wanted to do was violate her privacy.

However, he had kept a close eye on the small device, just in case she’d sent him a message from his own number, about the mix-up. But there had been absolutely nothing from her all afternoon. Which meant that Emma either didn’t know about the mistake she’d made, or she didn’t think it was important enough to reach out to him over.

But as Killian sat on his sofa that evening, watching the night slowly tick away, he started to wonder if it was time for him to reach out to his friend. As much as he refused to believe that the studio would go to the trouble of arranging a meeting just to deliver bad news, he was beginning to worry that something had happened, and that Emma was alone somewhere in Los Angeles, in desperate need of a friend.

Thankfully, before he could unlock the device to place the call, the sound of a car door closing outside caught his attention. And it was soon followed by the front door being pushed open.

“Killian?” Emma called out, as she kicked off her heels and slid her coat over her shoulders.

“There you are,” he sighed, leaning casually against the doorframe that lead to the lounge, so as not to give away his concern. “I was just about to send out a search party.”

“I’m sorry. I had _no idea_ how long these negotiations would take. Archie wanted us to have a say on every point the studio had put into the contract, and they wanted the same consideration with my own conditions.” Emma pushed herself up onto her toes to brush a kiss over his cheek, before grabbing his hand to pull him back into the lounge.

“Did you manage to come to an agreement on anything?” Killian had no idea how these sorts of negotiations went. He’d only ever attended the ones to discuss a pay rise with the network, and they were usually brief.

“Yeah. They uh… most of the terms they offered I’d have agreed to anyway. But Archie wanted to negotiate to get the best possible deal for me. They’re going to draw up an edited contract containing all of the terms we discussed, and then, if I’m happy with it, I can sign it.”

“Holy shit, Ems. That’s amazing,” he praised.

“Yeah,” she chuckled, and that one small sound told Killian everything. His best friend genuinely hadn’t expected to come away so successfully that evening.

“I’m really proud of you,” he whispered, as he reached out to brush a piece of hair back from her face, that had escaped from her textured bun. “Emma Swan, multi-award winning actress and screenwriter,” he praised, as he dropped his hand down to the rest along the back of the sofa, so that his fingertips could brush over her bare shoulders.

“I think you might be getting just a little ahead of yourself there,” she giggled. But Emma sobered rather quickly. “Thank you, Killian. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

“Of course you could have,” he assured her. “You wrote the script. I didn’t do anything.”

“You pushed me to pitch it. If it wasn’t for you, it would still be sat on my bookshelf gathering dust. So… thank you.”

Killian found his eyes dropping down to watch as Emma’s lips formed the last two words she spoke, turning her simple statement of gratitude into something _more_. He’d never wanted to kiss her quite as much as he did in that moment.

And it would have been so easy.

All he needed to do was close his eyes and bring his lips down to meet hers.

The hand that was already dancing lightly over the back of her shoulders froze at the realization, while his other tightened its grip on her wrist.

Emma’s eyes fluttered closed at the exact moment that Killian pulled back to put some distance between the two of them. He needed some space to think clearly, without the scent of her clouding his senses. But he didn’t want his friend to think that she’d done anything wrong, so he remained where he was sat.

“Wha… uh… what did you request?” he asked, as he tried desperately to get their night back on track.

The sudden atmosphere that had descended over the room felt heavy with the weight of expectation that was pressing down upon him, urging him to just kiss her. And he knew that Emma could sense that something had change.

“Huh?” she asked, as she slowly blinked her eyes open. Her face fell a little when she saw the space between herself and her best friend. But she covered it quickly, with a soft smile that she only ever offered to him.

“You said you had some requests of your own that you made. I was just wondering what those were?”

“Oh, uh…” Emma’s face flushed a little at the question, and Killian wondered what she could have possibly requested that would be so embarrassing to her. “I want to retain creative control over the script. That would mean having a final say over any changes made to it, the casting for the piece… that sort of thing. They suggested an executive producer role as a sort of compromise. That way I’d get some say in it all, but they’d also get to have their people make decisions too. And I uh… I um…”

“Spit it out, Ems,” he teased, as he reached out to tilt her chin up, so that her eyes would meet his. When they did, Killian was a little shocked at what he saw there. Emma wasn’t embarrassed by the request she’d made. She was nervous about how her friend would react when he heard what it was.

“I told them I want you to play the lead role,” she whispered.

Killian’s jaw dropped open with his surprise as his eyes widened a little. He’d thought she’d been joking about that decision when they’d first spoken about it. Hell, he knew he had been. But hearing that she’d put that request into her list of demands for the contract, was a little overwhelming. Because Killian wasn’t stupid. He knew that Emma’s script had award-winning potential written all over it. Any A-lister in Hollywood would fight for the chance to headline her movie. And yet, Emma believed in his abilities enough to want _him_ to portray the character she’d so painstakingly created.

“What um… what did they say?”

“You have to audition for the role,” she told him softly. “But as an executive producer for the show, and with the conditions Archie wanted to add to my contract, I’d have a lot of control over the final casting decisions. So…”

“Wow, Ems. I uh… I really don’t know what to say.”

“Say you’ll audition for the role?” The way her eyes met his, begging for his agreement, told Killian just how much this issue meant to his friend.

Which gave him his answer.

“Of course I will,” he chuckled, reaching out for her hand once more. “But you have to promise me something in return, Emma?” When she nodded to show that she was listening, he added, “If the rest of the casting panel don’t think that I’m right for this role, don’t overrule them. I love you, Ems. And I love that you want to give me this opportunity. But I don’t want to be the person who sabotages this chance for you. Okay?”

Emma nodded her agreement to Killian’s statement even as he saw the _but_ dancing behind her eyes. She didn’t voice her concerns though. Instead, she simply whispered, “You’re my Officer Andrews, Killian. You always were.”


	34. Chapter 33

Two days later, Killian watched on with amusement as Emma and Anna went through exactly the same process once more, with the new dresses that his friend had ordered while she’d been in the state.

“Do I get a vote this time?” he called out, startling Emma’s attention away from the phone in her hand.

“Do you want one?” she countered, raising a brow in his direction.

Killian had already been past her room a number times that afternoon, as he sorted his laundry. So he knew that the women had managed to get their shortlist down to one of two dresses.

But he wasn’t going to tell Emma that.

“It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make for you,” he sighed, as he dropped down into the chair in the corner of her room. Emma already had a small stack of books beside it, their spines lovingly creased from her many rereads. The cushions had taken on a smell that could only ever be described as _her_ , instead of that fresh-from-the-bag scent they’d previously held, and he Killian found himself relaxing a little further into them as it filled his senses.

“That’s so big of you, Killian,” his sister-in-law called across the line, as she shot him a knowing smirk.

“Well, I always told you that Liam might have been the older brother, but I was definitely the bigger one,” he teased, waggling his brows for full effect.

Emma snorted out a laugh as she watched her friend’s face flame bright red over the phone, while she tried to find some kind of comeback that would defend her husband’s honor. Anna eventually settled on, “Well… we have two kids, so it’s not like he’s struggling there.”

“Do you two need a moment to hammer all of this out?” she wondered. But the huge smile that Emma was wearing told Killian just how much she was enjoying their playful banter.

“Sorry, Ems. We’re focused now,” Anna told her, and Killian nodded his head in agreement, as they all turned their attention back to the two dresses that had been laid out over her bed. One appeared to be a navy blue, pinstriped piece that Killian had to admit looked horrendous from the way the fabric rested on the bed, while the other was a cream colored, rather ordinary looking dress. If he had to choose based on what he was seeing right then, he wouldn’t have picked either of them.

“Try the blue again,” Anna suggested, as she watched her friend’s eyes dart between the two. “Killian can have the final say, but he needs to see them on you before he does.”

Killian nodded his agreement as Emma turned to hand the phone over to him. “Hey, Anna,” he greeted, but a flash of fabric in front of him had his head snapping up in surprise. “Woah, Ems. Don’t you think you should maybe do that in the bathroom?” he asked, as he tried to avert his gaze.

But he could still see the emerald-green lace of her bra from the corner of his eyes, and if he were being completely honest with himself, he wasn’t sure he really wanted to look away.

“I wear roughly the same things when you come home and find me in your pool,” she pointed out. “Don’t get all shy on me now.”

“I uh…” he started to protest, because seeing Emma in her underwear seemed far more intimate than seeing her in a bikini had been. “I just… I guess I’m surprised you feel comfortable doing that in front of me,” he mumbled.

Somewhere in his hand, Anna was snorting out a laugh that she was trying her hardest to smother. But Killian couldn’t really focus on his sister-in-law right then, when Emma was wiggling her jeans down and over her hips.

“I’m going to hell,” he mumbled to himself, as he screwed his eyes shut and tried his hardest to will his body into not acting inappropriately.

“So Killian, how was work?” Anna eventually asked, offering her brother-in-law a much-needed distraction.

“It was uh… it was good. We’ve just finished filming for episode two, so we’re bang on schedule. I’m not sure how a network hasn’t snapped Belle up sooner, though. She’s a complete professional on set.”

“Okay, what do you think?” Emma asked, as she finally turned back to face her friends, fully dressed in the navy-blue piece that had been resting over her bed.

Killian was glad that Anna had suggested trying the dress on, because it certainly looked better on Emma than it had done on her bed.

“It’s nice,” he told her, letting his eyes wander over her form from head-to-toe. “It’s um… it’s maybe a little too tight for a work meeting, though,” he suggested, cringing a little as he did. He was probably the person least qualified to offer fashion advice, but the way the fabric of the dress clung to her hips had his mind wandering. And he knew that if his mind was wandering, at least one of those executives’ would do the same. The last thing he wanted was for Emma’s chances to suffer, just because she’d picked an inappropriate dress for the day.

“That’s what Anna said,” she sighed, as she turned back around and reached down for the hem of the gown. “I’ll try the other one now.”

Killian flicked his gaze back down to the phone in his hand, and Anna offered him an encouraging nod and smile, as she said, “I’m so glad to hear that. Liam had said you weren’t really enjoying things these last few seasons, but you were still locked into your contract. He’ll be pleased to know that it’s getting better for you.”

“You weren’t enjoying things?” Emma called back over her shoulder. Killian raised his eyes just in time to see his best friend stood in front of him in nothing but emerald-green lace lingerie, before he dropped his gaze once more. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You had things going on, and I was in the middle of what was, quite frankly, a nasty divorce. A big part of me thought _that_ was what was causing it. And maybe it was? I mean, I’m happier now,” he assured her.

“You don’t need to keep things from me just because I have things going on, Killian. You’re my best friend. I’m always here for you. Just as you’re always here for me.”

He looked up as Emma made her way back over to him, this time with the cream-colored dress hanging loosely from her shoulders, and offered her a small smile.

“Zip me up?” she asked, as she turned around to show him the large patch of bare skin that was revealed by the gaping back of her dress, and the green lace band that rested around the middle of her back.

Killian sat her phone down on the arm of the chair with slightly trembling fingers, as he pushed himself to his feet. With the lightest of touches he swept her hair over her right shoulder, before using his left hand to glide the zip up to the very top of the dress, pulling the garment tightly closed around her form.

It was an oddly intimate moment between the two of them, and Killian was pretty sure that he wasn’t the only one who had felt it, given the way that Emma’s breathing hitched a little as she whispered, “Thanks.”

When he glanced down to the phone it was to see his sister-in-law exaggeratedly mouthing the words _tell her_ at him, but a quick shake of his head had her slumping back into her own seat, as Emma turned once more to ask, “What about this one?”

“Wow,” he replied, dropping down into the chair to keep himself from reaching out for her. The cream-colored dress looked far more flattering on Emma than it did off her. While it highlighted her figure well, thanks to the black belt wrapped around her waist, it wasn’t in an obscene way. “That’s the one,” he agreed, as Anna nodded her head over the phone. “It’s perfect.”

“You really think so?” Emma looked down at herself once more, but the smile didn’t leave her face. Hearing Killian’s praise for the dress had already solidified her use of it in her mind.

“Definitely. You look incredible in it, and you also look like you’re about to kick arses and take names. Sony won’t know what’s hit them.”

She leaned down to press a quick kiss to his cheek as she whispered, “Thank you, Killian.”

“No worries,” he told her, before announcing a little louder, “And my work here is done. If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the kitchen ordering dinner.”

“Aw, and there was me thinking you were gonna offer to cook,” Anna taunted.

“Hey, my lack of an offer to cook is a gift in itself. I’d probably end up poisoning us both if that happened.”

* * *

Emma felt much more confident the next morning as she strode into the offices of Sony Pictures with Archie hot on her heels, and gave her name to the woman working at reception. The two of them were directed up towards a conference room on the twelfth floor, where another overly-cheery woman was already waiting to show them were the meeting would be held. After taking their jackets she disappeared for a few moments, before returning with a tray of refreshments for the two of them to share, while they waited for the CEO to finish with his first meeting of the day.

“You seem more relaxed today,” Archie noted, as he pulled out a file containing all of the clauses they had already managed to negotiate with Lionsgate, and some more obscure wishes that Emma had expressed an interest in, but had mentioned weren’t absolutely vital to the agreement. Things with Lionsgate had gone so well that he was prepared to push the boundaries a little more with Sony, just to see how good of a proposal they would make.

“Well, at least we know that no matter what happens here, Lionsgate are ready to make an offer,” she explained. Because even if everything went catastrophically wrong that morning, having a huge studio pick up her piece would definitely salvage Emma’s reputation.

“And we know Sony are too,” Archie countered. “We wouldn’t be here if they weren’t. Don’t undersell yourself, Emma. This is about getting the best possible deal for you, with everything you need. If it doesn’t come from the biggest studio that doesn’t mean it’s not the right offer.”

“You sound like Killian.”

“That’s because Killian is clearly a wise man,” Archie chuckled. “Don’t get complacent with the offer you have. We can use it in our favor, to show there’s a demand and encourage competition. You never know, we might walk away from here with enough to encourage Lionsgate to increase their offer.”

“I’ll leave all of that to you,” she told him, as a slight commotion outside of the door caught their attention. “You are the expert here, after all.”

The door to the conference room was pulled open with a slight hiss, and the CEO for Sony Pictures made his way into the room with a small team of people following close behind him.

“Miss Swan, I’m Anthony Vinciquerra, it’s lovely to meet you. I’d like to introduce you to Tom Rothman, he’s the chairman of our Motion Pictures Group. And these are a few of our lawyers.”

Emma offered her hand to each of the men before her, and gave their own a firm shake, before she turned to introduce Archie. After the pleasantries had been exchanged, the group made their way back over to the table to take their seats once more, as Mr Rothman declared, “Okay. Let’s start with numbers, shall we? How does three million sound?”

Emma almost swallowed her own tongue at his words.

“And of course, we were thinking of something in the region of a five percent bump of the gross takings from the finished result.”

“That uh… that sounds good,” she managed to squeak out. Because that number was far higher than the one that Archie had finally managed to talk Lionsgate into offering them earlier that week.

* * *

“Got the right phone this time?” Belle teased, as she let herself into Killian’s trailer for lunch. As it was a Friday, the two of them had splashed out on a couple of pizzas to share, and had decided to hide away in his trailer while they waited for the call back to set. For some reason, their director had been in a foul mood all morning. And neither one of them wanted to risk their job by getting in his way.

“Yes, thank god,” he sighed in relief. “Emma has her meeting with Sony Pictures today, so I was just sending her some luck.”

“I’m sure she won’t need it, but add mine to the pile, will ya?”

Killian’s fingers flew over his screen once more before he declared, “Done,” and tucked the device safely into the breast pocket of the shirt he was wearing.

“So, do you guys have any plans this weekend?” Belle wondered, as she opened the box with her name on it, and began pulling apart the slices of the pizza that she’d ordered. “Because if you don’t, you’re welcome to come for dinner. And I know I probably sound pretty desperate for new friends right now, but the truth is… I am. Please come.”

Killian chuckled as he took a swig from a bottle of water, before he offered her a small nod. “We don’t have anything planned. I’ll double check with Emma, but I’m pretty sure it’ll be okay.”

“Oh thank God. I thought I’d have to suffer through another weekend of making polite small talk with Will’s new colleagues. And while I’m sure they’re all great people, they’re not _my_ kind of people,” she explained, as she relaxed back into her seat.

“I get that. My brother’s work colleagues are nice enough in small doses. But I remember being with them for his stag weekend, and we just had nothing in common at all. They didn’t even support the same sports teams we did.”

“So, how did you and Emma become friends?” she asked. “I mean, don’t take this the wrong way, but you guys don’t look like you’d have much in common either.”

“I think most people think that,” Killian assured her, as his mind replayed the memory of his mother’s reaction when he’d first asked if he could bring Emma home to visit. Nobody had expected the American TV star to have much in common with the boy from Ireland. “But we like a lot of the same things. We’re both drawn to the same kind of shows and movies, and we like the same sort of music. We enjoy doing the same kind of things in our free time. I think the only interests we don’t really share are her love of fashion and mine for sport.”

“Well, I love fashion too. So hopefully I can use that to bond with her,” Belle noted.

She wasn’t as well versed in it as Emma was. After she’d landed the role on the show, Belle had done her research. It hadn’t taken her long to discover the close friendship her new leading man shared with the woman who had once held her position. From there, she’d gone on to learn more about Emma Swan, in the hopes that it would help her to bond with Killian a little more. While neither of them were overly fond of sharing their private lives with their fans, Emma seemed to share much more in the space of a month than Killian did in an entire year. So Belle had seen the pictures of Emma’s work with fashion designers around the world, and her attendance at Fashion Week. She’d never been lucky enough to get an invite herself, but she hoped that what little knowledge she did have on the subject would be enough to help her make another new friend in the city.

“I’m sure you will,” Killian assured her. “You’re actually a lot like Emma, in some ways. I think you’ll both get along really well.”

Belle said nothing else as she turned her attention back to her pizza. She didn’t want to say that being compared to Emma was probably one of the biggest compliments he could have paid her. But that didn’t mean it wasn’t true.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Emma's look here is based on Jen's look for the People's Choice Awards 2012 nominations press conference on November 8, 2011.**


	35. Chapter 34

“Seriously, Killian. We’re gonna be late if you don’t hurry up,” Emma chuckled, tapping her foot impatiently against the floor. Her best friend liked to tease her about how long it usually took for her to get ready to leave the house, but he was the one slowing them down that evening.

“Is it too late to text Belle and ask what the dress code is for tonight?”

“Yes,” she sighed. “You look fine. Let’s go.”

Even though she was enjoying teasing her friend for doing the same thing he often accused her of doing, Emma could understand why he was so worried about his appearance that evening. The last dinner party he’d been invited to had been two weeks before he’d caught his wife cheating on him. And while Killian hadn’t said much on the subject since then, she was starting to realize just how alone and isolated her best friend had become, during his separation and divorce.

Belle and her husband presented him with the opportunity to make friends again. Friends that weren’t connected to Milah, and didn’t know all of the intimate details surrounding their spilt. Belle was someone that Killian wanted to keep in his life, so his worry over his appearance that night made sense. It was his way of deflecting his concerns that away from set, the two of them just wouldn’t connect.

Emma had a feeling that he was panicking over nothing. But she would still do everything in her power to make sure that her friend left Belle’s home that evening, as happily as he could.

“See, you look great,” she praised, as he finally left his bathroom wearing a pair of navy dress pants, and a pale blue shirt. “You just need…” Instead of finishing her sentence, Emma reached up to pop another button on the shirt he was wearing, before opening up his collar and smoothing the fabric over his firm chest. “There. Perfect.”

Killian offered her a shy smile and a whispered thanks before he snagged his navy jacket from the bed, and then held out his arm for her to take. “Shall we?”

“We shall,” she agreed, slipping her own through his, as she allowed him to guide her down the stairs and out to the garage where his car was parked.

“You know, I keep thinking about changing my car,” he said, as they pulled out of the gated community and onto the road. “I was thinking of going for something sportier. But I’m worried that will end up making me look like I’m going through a midlife crisis.”

“You’re thirty-two, Killian. You’re nowhere _near_ a midlife crisis.” Although, Emma had a feeling that this was possibly a post-divorce celebration of sorts. Her friend had never really shown an interest in sports cars in all the years that she’d known him. But if he truly wanted to buy one, she certainly wouldn’t be the one to stop him. “You should buy whatever the hell you want. You have total freedom in your life for what’s possibly the very first time. Make the most of it. _Enjoy it_.”

“Thanks, Ems.” He reached out to give her hand a gentle squeeze before he pulled back to concentrate on the directions that Belle had given to him. When they finally pulled into her driveway, Killian seemed to hesitate for a moment before he killed the engine.

“It’s gonna be okay,” Emma assured him. “Belle wouldn’t have invited us both if she didn’t want us here. And you guys spend like ten hours a day together as it is. I’m sure if this wasn’t going to work, you’d both know by now.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Killian nodded his head firmly before pulling the handle on his car door and sliding out of his seat. Emma took a moment to gather up the bottles of wine they’d bought with them for the evening, so when she finally turned to reach for her own handle, she wasn’t that surprised to find the door already open, and a hand extended for her to take.

Her best friend had always been a perfect gentleman.

Until you got him _really_ drunk.

Emma rang the bell by the large wooden door and then reached for her friend’s hand while they waited for someone to answer.

“Hey, you guys made it,” Belle gushed, as she pulled the door open wide to usher them inside. “I’m not gonna lie, a part of me was a little worried that you might cancel last minute, so I’ve probably driven my husband crazy today. It’s so good to see you again, Emma.”

Emma handed over the bottles of red and white wine she’d picked out that morning, before leaning in to brush a kiss to Belle’s cheek. “It’s lovely to see you too. We didn’t get much time to chat last time we were in the same building.”

Belle sat the bottles down onto the nearest flat surface, before helping Emma slip off her coat. As soon as she had it hung up, she turned back to get a good look at what her coworker’s best friend was wearing.

“Oh my god, I love your dress,” she gushed. “Where did you get it?”

Emma chuckled a little as she looked down at the fabric swirling around her calves. She’d picked a light dress for the night, with a bustier bodice, and a black satin skirt that fell to the middle of her thighs. The whole thing was covered with a layer of nude lace that had been printed with small, colorful flowers, and was held up with the thinnest of straps. It was elegant enough for a dinner party but fun enough for a gathering with friends. And Killian envied her ability to find something that fit their situation so perfectly.

“It’s an Allen Schwartz piece,” she replied, as the two of them followed Belle through to the lounge, where her husband was already waiting.

“Will, this is Killian and Emma. Guys, this is my husband, Will.”

Emma and Killian offered their hands for shaking, the former of the two leaning in to press a kiss to their host’s left cheek as she did before Belle tugged her down onto the large sofa in the room.

“I love it. Do you wear a lot of his pieces regularly, or is this the first?”

Sensing that Belle had found her starting point with Emma, Killian followed Will through to the kitchen, where the other man cracked open a couple of bottles of beer. He handed one over before he headed back to check on the pots simmering away on the stove.

“Sorry about that. Belle’s been kind of desperate for new female friends in her life since we moved here, so she’s got a few months’ worth of chat about fashion and celebrity gossip bottled away inside of her.”

“Oh, that’s fine,” Killian chuckled. “I’ve been friends with Emma long enough to know how much she’ll appreciate having someone to talk about all of that stuff with. I’m clueless when it comes to fashion.”

Will raised his bottle in silent agreement, and Killian reached forward to touch the neck of his to the other man’s.

“So uh… how long have you known Emma?” he asked, as he turned back to check on their meal. Belle had made sure to stress at least a dozen times that Killian and Emma were only friends before the doorbell had rung that evening. And Will wasn’t entirely sure why such a big deal was being made out of their situation.

“Um… ten years, give or take a few months. It doesn’t really feel like it’s been that long.”

“I get that.” Will turned the gas down on his burners before he finally took a seat opposite the man sat on the other side of his counter. “Belle and I will have been married for nine years this year. It only feels like yesterday that I was proposing to her.”

“Congratulations, Man.”

The two men nodded their heads in understanding but remained silent. Belle had also briefed her husband on her co-star’s brutal divorce when their dinner plans had been confirmed, so the last thing Will wanted to do was poke at an open wound. And Killian didn’t much feel like bringing down the mood of the evening by opening it up himself.

“Emma and Killian brought us wine,” Belle announced, as the two women made their way into the kitchen. Emma made a beeline straight for her friend, wrapping an arm around his waist as she leaned in to whisper something to him, while Belle held up the two bottles that their guests had gifted to them.

“I don’t think I know that brand.”

“Oh, you’re in for a treat,” Emma promised. “Killian and I found this little vineyard not too far from where we used to film years ago, and it’s the only wine we drink now. I made him ship me bottles across the world while I was traveling.”

“I still don’t fully recall how we found that place,” her friend mused, as Belle cracked open the bottle of red to pour into a crystal decanter.

“That’s because we drank a lot of tequila that weekend.”

“Ahhh, yes. So many weekends lost to that,” he chuckled. “Oh, how young and stupid we were.”

Belle threw her husband a look that told him this was exactly why she’d made it clear these two were not a couple, and Will nodded to show that he understood. If they weren’t already a couple they clearly should be. And if he knew his wife as well as he thought he did, she’d probably try and find some way to make that happen before the year was over.

“Okay, well, I think dinner’s ready now. So why don’t you guys go and get settled in the dining room, and I’ll bring everything through?” he suggested.

“Do you need some help?” Emma was already rising to her feet to step in where needed, but Belle shook her head firmly.

“I’ll come and help him when I’ve shown you two where to go. You’re our guests. Let us do all of the work.”

Emma didn’t look too happy about the arrangements, but she did let her new friend usher them both through to the warmly lit dining room, just off the back of the kitchen. Belle set them each up with glasses of wine and water before she hurried back through to help her husband.

“They seem like lovely people,” Emma whispered, as she took a sip from her glass and then set it back down on the coaster.

“They do. Hopefully, this means we can do this kind of thing more often.”

“I’d like that.”

Emma had to admit that her main reason for agreeing to the gathering was to help Killian make new friends. She hated how isolated he’d become since his divorce, and she’d do anything to change that. But Belle and Will both seemed like sweet people. The kind of people she could imagine spending her free time with. So if Killian wanted to make their gatherings a more regular occurrence, she certainly wouldn’t have any complaints on the matter.

“Here we go. I hope you guys enjoy this.” Belle sat down a large serving platter full of perfectly steamed vegetables and then moved to take her own seat as her husband followed with what Emma knew was a beef wellington, thanks to her best friend’s love for the dish. Will headed back to the kitchen once more for a bowl of mashed potatoes and a jug of sauce before he began carving up their meal.

“This looks amazing. Thank you both,” she praised.

“I’ll let you in on a little secret,” Killian’s new colleague stage-whispered, as she watched her husband work. “He’s a chef, and I enjoy showing off his talents.”

“Well, you can show them off to us anytime you want.”

The table chuckled a little at Emma’s words before falling into a comfortable silence as they took the first few bites of their meal.

Killian started to think that bringing Emma out for the night had been a bad idea when she began making small moans of appreciation that vibrated all the way through his body, before settling in his groin.

“So, Emma, how did your meeting go?” Belle asked, breaking through the silence in the room.

“Oh um… it was good.”

“That’s the understatement of the year,” Killian snorted into his glass, while his friend kicked his shin under the table.

“Do you mind if I ask what it was about?”

“Killian didn’t tell you?” she asked, turning to look first at her best friend before she gave her attention back to Belle. “I uh… I’ve been meeting with some studios about a screenplay I wrote.”

“Holy shit! That’s amazing. Which studios have you met with so far?”

“Just Lionsgate and Sony,” she chuckled. “But they both made me an offer for it.”

“Wow. Even I know that’s impressive,” Will mumbled, before shoving another forkful of potatoes into his mouth.

“Sony made her an unbelievable offer this week,” Killian threw in proudly. He really wasn’t sure why Emma had been so blasé about it when she’d told him about their terms. He knew that if he’d been the one selling that piece, he’d have leaped over the table to sign the damned contract there and then.

“So you’re gonna make a movie with Sony?”

“I uh… I don’t know.” Emma turned her eyes down to her plate and fixed them on the swirling patterns she was making through the jus with her fork. “I think um… I think I’m actually gonna sell it to Lionsgate.”

“What?”

Emma had been expecting her best friend’s reaction, but she still cringed a little at the biting tone of his voice.

“They made me a better offer.”

“Sony offered you _twice_ what Lionsgate did.”

“ _You_ were the one who told me not to be blinded by the money,” she reminded him, turning a little to face her friend.

“It’s not just about the money, Ems. Sony has more connections. They offered you a bigger budget for production and promotion, _and_ they already have talent and directors interested in working with you. You’d be crazy not to want to work with them.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Here was me thinking that it was _my_ screenplay to sell, and not yours,” she snapped back.

Will and Belle exchanged a tense look as the two friends stared each other down. Even they could tell that there was something else going on at that moment, that wasn’t being said.

“Of course it’s yours to sell,” Killian conceded. “I just… I want what’s best for you, Ems. And to me, it sounds like Sony’s it. I don’t know why you’re digging your heels in over this.”

“Can we just… can we not do this now?” she asked. “We’re ruining Belle and Will’s night.”

And just like that, the discussion was closed.

But the rest of the evening felt rather awkward in comparison to how it had begun.

* * *

“So… are we gonna talk about what happened tonight?” Killian asked as he closed the door behind the two of them a little more forcefully than he had intended.

“It’s late.”

“No, it’s not. Come on, Ems. You tell me _everything_. What are you hiding from me? What’s so wrong with Sony’s offer?”

“It’s not…” She cut herself off at the look that flashed behind her best friend’s eyes at her easy dismal, before taking his hand into hers to pull him through to the lounge so they could sit together. “Sony already have a cast in mind for the piece. And it’s not the cast I want. They’re not willing to budge on that point.”

“Is this about me?”

Emma really wished she could say it wasn’t. But no matter how hard she tried to picture Tom fucking Cruise as Officer Andrews, he just wouldn’t fit into the character that she’d created. It was a role made for Killian. And she knew that.

“Not entirely. While it’s true that in my mind, the role is perfect for you, I just… I don’t see the lead roles being filled by Tom Cruise and Reese Witherspoon. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have anything against either of those actors. They’re just not right for this.”

“And Lionsgate is offering you more control over casting,” he rationalized. Now it was all making sense. Emma had conveniently left out the preliminary casting that Sony had already done for her film, when she’d told him about the contract negotiations. And he could understand why.

But if he were being brutally honest with himself, Killian couldn’t see Tom Cruise fitting the role he’d read for Emma’s main character either.

“Then sign the contract with Lionsgate,” he told her. “It’s your movie, Emma. It should be made how _you_ want it to be made. With the cast you prefer.”

Emma leaned forward to wrap her arms around her friend’s shoulders, and Killian returned her embrace with a fierce one of his own. “Thank you.”

“Next time, just tell me this,” he chuckled, as he ran a soft hand through her hair.

The two friends sat in silence for a moment, just enjoying being held in each other’s arms. Killian was the one to eventually break it, as he pulled back to tell Emma, “We owe Belle and Will a _huge_ apology.”

“I’m working on,” she laughed, already pulling out her phone to start making some inquiries.

      

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Emma's look here is based on Jen's look for Nina Dobrev's birthday party earlier this month, and Killian's is based on Colin's look for SDCC in 2014.**


	36. Chapter 35

“Ems, you here?”

Killian was expecting the silence that followed his words, but he couldn’t deny that a small part of himself was hoping he’d come home to find his best friend waiting for him once more.

After spending a couple of weeks in Los Angeles, going back and forth on studio negotiations for the script she was planning to sell, Emma had finally gotten the message she’d been waiting for. The Spielberg piece that she’d been cast in was ready to start production, and she was needed at the studio bright and early on Monday morning. The production crew wanted to spend some time going through the wardrobe that had been assigned to Emma’s character, making sure that each piece fit her figure perfectly before filming would begin the following week. And between wardrobe fittings and meetings with her new co-stars, table reads had been scheduled to allow for any last-minute changes to be made to the script.

It was a process every actor went through when they were hired for a new job, and it was one that usually never failed to get the adrenaline flowing.

When she left the house that morning with a fresh green smoothie in one hand and her car keys in the other, Killian hadn’t expected to see his friend again until late that evening.

But the absolute silence in his home still felt strange.

It was odd how Emma had managed to fill the house with so much life in such a short space of time - and it wasn’t just through her persistent singing. There were large vases of fresh flowers in almost every room of the house, filling the space with a beautifully fresh fragrance that never failed to bring back memories from his childhood. Next to the vase on his coffee table was a trashy romance novel she’d been reading. The corners were dog-eared from where she’d turned down the pages to mark her place in the book, and along the back of his couch was a big, neon-pink, fluffy blanket that she always used to cover her legs while she read.

They were only small touches, but they were the kind of small touches that made his house feel like a real home, for the very first time since he’d picked up the keys from his realtor.

Killian sighed as he made his way through to the kitchen to grab the takeout menu for his favorite Chinese restaurant. Emma probably wouldn’t make it back in time for dinner, and he didn’t much fancy trying to make himself something to eat. He’d either end up with a salad and deep regrets or burning down his home. So with his regular order placed, Killian kicked off his boots and made himself comfortable on the sofa as he turned on the television.

He was ten minutes into a Yankees game when the buzz of his front gate sounded and assuming that it was his food delivery, Killian hit the button to allow the driver entry to his community. However, when he pulled open the front door he found himself face-to-face with a different kind of delivery driver, and he couldn’t quite stop the look of confusion from spreading over his face.

“I have a special delivery for Emma Swan.”

“She’s at work,” Killian replied carefully. “But I can take it for you.”

“Name?”

“Jones. Killian Jones.”

The bored looking driver scribbled something down onto a piece of paper, before turning his clipboard to tap his pen against a box at the bottom of the sheet. “Sign here, please?”

Killian did so as neatly as he could, then printed his name and the date into the corresponding boxes before he handed the document back over. He’d signed enough of them in his life to know just how important they were. The delivery driver reached back into a messenger bag looped over his shoulders and withdrew a large Manilla envelope. “Enjoy your night,” he told Killian, as he handed the package over.

“Yeah. You too,” he replied distractedly, already pushing the door closed.

Killian managed to wait until he was back in his lounge before he flipped the envelope over in his hands. He knew what he was expecting it to be, but seeing it in person was still more startling than he ever thought it would be.

Emma’s name had been printed above his address and stuck in the very center of the package. The words PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL were stamped across the top and bottom of the envelope in bright red ink, and the Lionsgate Films logo was printed across the top left-hand corner.

It was the revised draft of Emma’s script.

She’d told him that she was expecting a copy with the studio’s additions to the piece so that she could approve and decline what she did and didn’t like. But neither of them had thought it would arrive so soon.

Lionsgate clearly wasn’t messing around.

Killian fired off a quick message to his friend to let her know what had arrived and then dropped the package down onto the coffee table next to Emma’s book. He was determined to put the script out of his mind, but it didn’t really work. As he ate his dinner he found his eyes drifting back to the package, wondering what Lionsgate would have wanted to add or remove to bring the piece up to their standards.

He tried so hard to focus on the game that was playing on his screen while he waited for his friend to get back, but if Killian were being brutally honest he wouldn’t have even been able to tell you what sport he was watching that evening, let alone which teams were playing.

When the sound of a car pulling into the driveway finally met his ears, followed by the scratch of Emma’s key in the door, Killian sprang to his feet and reached for the envelope, before hesitating and sitting it back down on the coffee table. The last thing he wanted to do was make his friend feel like he was pressuring her into sharing something with him that she wasn’t ready for him to see. But he also didn’t want Emma to think that he wasn’t excited for her achievements, so he reached for the folder once more.

“Whatcha doing?” Emma asked with a slight chuckle, and Killian turned to see his friend lingering in the doorway.

“I uh… you have mail.” He picked the package back up and held it out to her, hoping that she hadn’t been standing there long enough to see how much he’d fiddled with it.

Judging by the look on Emma’s face, she had.

“Ahhh… and you _really_ wanna see what’s inside of it but you don’t wanna seem like a snoop,” she reasoned, as her eyes lingered over the logo at the top of the envelope. When she turned the package over and found that it was still fully sealed, she was a little surprised. Given how much support Killian had thrown behind her for the piece, she could imagine just how hard he’d had to fight down the instinct inside of himself that wanted to rip it open and read the new additions that had been made. But she couldn’t really blame him for that. After all, it was his natural curiosity that had resulted in her multi-million-dollar deal to begin with.

Emma used her keys to slice open the top of the envelope, and then shook the script and covering letter out into her hand. After a quick scan of the note, she set both it and the envelope aside, before dropping down into what had become her spot on the sofa.

“Shall we?” she asked, patting the space next to her.

“Huh?”

“Do you wanna read the damned thing or not?” The brow she arched in his direction had Killian sitting down beside her almost instantly, but he still looked a little hesitant about the whole thing.

“Don’t you wanna read through them yourself first? I mean, what if you hate them? Or what if they took out a part that you really love?”

“Maybe the parts I hate will end up being the parts you love? Maybe you can help me understand why they’ve made these changes, or why different parts have been cut or moved,” she explained. “I know this is my screenplay, Killian but that means I’m never gonna be the most objective person when I read through it. And while you’re definitely biased, I know that your bias is only towards things that mean the best for me. So no, I don’t wanna read this alone. I wanna read it through with my best friend, who will give me his completely honest opinion on the changes that have been made. And not because I’m paying him to, but because he cares enough about me to want what’s best for me.”

Killian turned wide eyes towards his friend, touched by her words. She was going out of her way to include him in virtually every aspect of the process that had taken place since he’d convinced her to pitch her screenplay, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever have the words to thank her for that.

While he was certain that he would never find himself in her position at any point during his career, Killian was so grateful that she was giving him a chance to live it out through her.

“Besides,” she added, with a sly smile that told him he probably wasn’t going to like the next few words out of her mouth. “It’s good practice for when you audition for the role of Officers Andrews.”

He chuckled along with his friend as she shifted over a little more until her thigh was pressed tightly against his own, and the script was resting over both of their legs.

Deep down, Killian knew he would end up auditioning for that role. He’d never been able to refuse Emma’s wishes, and he certainly wasn’t going to start now. But the more adamant she was about him being the perfect person for the lead in her movie, the more he started to believe that she might _actually_ be right.

Of course, the moment he stepped into that room to read for the role, he knew his confidence would fly straight out of the nearest window.

“Ready?” Emma asked lifting the cover just enough to give them both a little peek at the opening page of the script.

“Ready,” he agreed.

For the next hour, Emma and Killian sat mostly in silence as they read through the changes that had been made to her very first screenplay. Most were only minor details that had been either added or removed to improve the flow of the piece, and Emma was relieved to see that. Somehow, seeing so few adjustments made her feel more confident in her own abilities. And Killian certainly didn’t hesitate to reaffirm just how talented he thought his best friend was when they came to the end of their second read.

But there was one section that featured a few major changes, and Emma wasn’t entirely sure how she felt about them. She’d deliberately left the romance out of the piece when she’d been drafting it, insisting to herself that it was more about self-discovery and recovery than the need to find love in order to heal. So she was surprised to see some background added on Officer Andrews’s past love.

“I think it’s a good thing,” Killian argued. “I think it tells us how much he’s lost, and I think it will show the viewers just how far he’s come by the end of the film.”

“You really think so? It kinda reads to me like they added a sex scene for the sake of adding a sex scene.”

“Well, if I’m being honest, they probably did,” he snorted out. “You know the old adage as well as I do, Love. Sex sells. But I don’t think it’s a detriment to your storyline.”

Emma still didn’t look convinced.

“How about we read it through?” he suggested. “You used to make me do that with lines for Agent Sloane when I didn’t like what the writers had put down for him. We could read through the scene and see how you feel when you hear it aloud?”

“Okay,” Emma agreed, as she stood from her place on the sofa. Killian followed her lead, turning to face her so that he could deliver Officer Andrews’s lines as they would be delivered on camera. “Do you need the script?”

“Nah, I’m good,” he chuckled. “Excellent memory, remember?”

Emma had always hated how easily he was able to memorize his lines with so little work on his part. It was unfair to everyone he worked with.

However, the moment her best friend slipped into character, all of her thoughts about his unfair advantages flew from her mind. She knew that she’d been right to stick with her gut and accept the offer from Lionsgate for the piece. But with his new physique, Killian fit the role of Officer Andrews even better than she’d originally imagined. And his delivery of the lines she’d written was so flawless, she felt a little breathless every time his eyes met hers - which made it difficult to read the words printed onto the page in front of her. It was probably the worst performance she’d ever given in her entire life, but Emma didn’t care. She was pretty sure Killian’s own was the best she’d seen him deliver.

They were about halfway through the scene when she finally realized what was coming next. The studio had written in an intense love scene between Andrews and his former lover, Julie.

An intense scene that began with one hell of a kiss.

A kiss that she was pretty sure her best friend was expecting her to give him, as they made their way through the scene. After all, it was standard practice in the industry to follow the stage directions throughout rehearsals, so that everyone involved in the production could get a feel for the flow of the scene they would soon be shooting. That way, they wasted less time and money on botched takes.

“I uh… I’m sorry. I can’t do this.” Emma tossed the script down onto the seat she’d been occupying early that evening before she reached up to rake her hands through her hair. 

“What? Of course you can,” Killian chuckled. “This is the only way you’ll know for sure how you feel about these edits, Emma. And I know you’ve shot scenes like this before.” He cocked his head ever so slightly as he watched her pace the length of his lounge until realization suddenly hit him square in the face. “Is it because it’s me?” 

“Of course it’s because it’s you,” she scoffed.  “Look, it’s no big deal, Killian. Can we just… let’s forget about this. Please?”  

Killian snorted out a huff as he threw himself down onto the sofa. “Is the thought of kissing me really  _that_  repulsive to you, Emma? I mean, it’s a fucking scene for Christ’s sake. I’ve watched you kiss dozens of guys on camera before.”

His last statement came out a little harder than he had intended, but Killian wasn’t just angry about how she was reacting. He was hurt too. Emma wasn’t some newbie in Hollywood, stumbling her way through her first job. She knew that these kinds of scenes meant nothing. So her refusal to finish the one they’d started stung more than he _ever_ thought it would.

“Oh please, like you don’t get your own fair share of hot women to kiss on camera?” she threw back at him.

“If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were jealous about that, Swan.” Killian wasn’t sure where the words came from. All he could think about was hurting her the way her rejection had hurt him. And if the look that flashed behind her eyes was anything to judge by, he’d certainly achieved that.

Emma shook her head as she whirled on him once more, but instead of the burst of anger he was expecting, she seemed to deflate under his heated gaze. “You don’t get it, do you? Jesus, you’ve never got, Killian. You’ve… you know for someone so smart, you can be so fucking dense at times.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Emma chuckled bitterly as she turned her eyes down to her toes, and took a moment to watch as she flexed her feet in the carpet. She knew that once she opened her mouth to reply there would be no going back. And that thought alone almost made her take the easy way out.

But she was tired. So fucking tired of lying to herself and everyone around her about how she felt. She’d thought living with Killian would be easy, like their friendship had always been. She’d thought she could keep pushing aside how she felt about him, and focus instead on being the friend he so desperately needed.

She’d been wrong.

So very wrong.

The feelings she had for Killian weren’t going away, and they weren’t getting any easier to manage. As much as she hated to admit it to herself, Emma knew that if she kept pushing them down as she had been, she’d only end up destroying herself.

And she’d probably take Killian down with her.

“I don’t wanna kiss you for a scene, Killian because it means more to me than it’s _ever_ gonna mean to you. And I… I’m barely holding this together as it is. I can’t keep doing _this_ if we do _that_. I can’t keep pretending that you’re just a friend to me when I know how you kiss. So please… don’t ask me to do that.”

All of Killian’s anger fled instantly at the sight of her tears, and he made his way around the coffee table separating them both to reach out for her. But the moment his fingers were in touching distance of her damp cheeks, Emma took a large step back and out of his reach.

“Don’t,” she warned, wrapping one arm around herself as she held another up in warning.

“I don’t… I don’t understand what’s going on here, Emma. What’s happened? What’s changed?”

“Nothing,” she laughed bitterly. “Nothing’s changed. It’s always been this way.”

Killian looked so clueless that it was almost adorable.

_Almost._

“Don’t you get it yet, Killian? I love you. I’m _in_ love with. And I always have been.”


	37. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sorry for the delay with this one. I had some minor technical issues that left me without my laptop for over a week. Hopefully you'll think it was worth the wait.**

_“I love you. I’m_ in _love with. And I always h_ ave been.”

The words echoed through Killian’s mind on a loop, but they didn’t seem to be sinking in. How could she possibly have felt the same way about him, as he did about her? How could he have missed that? How long had she…

His eyes snapped up to meet hers as he tried his best to order the words rushing through his brain into something that would make sense, only to find that the lounge was empty.

“Emma?”

The silence that greeted his words had his heart pounding harder in his chest, as he took off at a jog. “Emma?” he called out again, pushing open every door in his home to check for her. “Emma? Where are you?” When he finally reached her bedroom and found the door wide open, with the room looking exactly as it had when she’d first left it that morning, his heart sank.

Emma was gone.

He made his way slowly back down the stairs, kicking himself for not reacting sooner with every step he took, as he headed back to the lounge. He needed to call her and make everything right. But of course, even his bloody phone was missing at that moment.

Killian pulled the cushions and blankets off the sofa, tossing them over his shoulder in his haste to try and find the device, which had a nasty habit of slipping between the cushions while he was watching television. When he finally managed to get his fingers on his phone, he didn’t hesitate to pull up Emma’s details and hit call on her number.

It rang once before her voicemail kicked in, and Killian swore loudly at the sound of the familiar recorded message. “Hey, this is Emma. I can’t take your call right now but if you leave me a message I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks.”

“Emma, it’s me. Call me when you get this. We _really_ need to talk. You can’t just… you can’t just say what you did and then walk out on me, Ems. We… we need to talk. Call me. Please.”

Killian hung up and then flopped down onto the floor, hanging his head between his knees.

Emma loved him. She had said that she was _in_ love with him. And now she was gone. He hadn’t even had a chance to say those words back to her, and she was already gone.

Killian wasn’t entirely sure how long he’d been stunned into silence by her revelation, but it couldn’t have been that long.

_Could it?_

He flipped his phone around and around in his hand, toying with the idea of calling her again. But the last thing he wanted to do was come across as pushy. Especially when Emma was already in defensive mode. She had a habit of running from everyone she loved when she was hurt, and he didn’t want to push her further away from him.

Not when the idea of finally having her was in touching distance at last.

So he made a promise to himself not to call her again - for at least another hour.

* * *

The next hour that passed was one of the slowest of Killian’s entire life. The television had seemed like an unwelcome companion after what had happened. So he’d thrown a few more cushions around in his search for the remote, before finally turning it off to sit on the floor in silence while he berated himself for not just grabbing her up and kissing the hell out of her like he knew he should have.

When his phone finally told him that an hour had passed since his call, he hit dial on Emma’s number once more and lifted the device to his ear.

“Hey, this is Emma. I can’t take your call right now, but if you leave me a message I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks.”

“Ems, it’s me. Again. I just… call me, okay? I’m worried about you.”

He disconnected the line with a heavy sigh as he dropped his head back to rest on the frame of the sofa. It wasn’t particularly comfortable, but Killian didn’t feel as though he deserved comfort at that moment.

* * *

“Hey, this is Emma. I can’t take your call right now, but if you leave me a message I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks.”

“Emma, I don’t even know if you’re getting these messages right now. But if you are, can you at least just message me or something, to let me know that you’re okay? It’s almost midnight and I’m starting to worry.”

Killian disconnected the call with more force than was truly necessary as he pushed his phone back into his pocket, and began pacing the length of his lounge. He’d poured himself a glass of whiskey to help take the edge off how he was feeling, but thoughts of something terrible happening to Emma stopped him from drinking it. He needed to remain alert and sober, no matter what happened.

The last thing he wanted to do was tell his best friend how he felt about her reeking of booze. Even he knew that wouldn’t go down well at all.

* * *

“Hey, this is Emma. I can’t take your call right now, but if you leave me a message I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks.”

“I get it. I fucked up. I was just… I was stunned, Emma. I didn’t know what to say. I… a part of me wondered if I was imagining things. I mean… It’s not like you expect your best friend to confess her love to you on a daily basis.” He laughed bitterly as he pivoted on his heels to pace the other way around his kitchen island. “Can you just… can you at least call me, Ems? Or text me. Yell at me. Hit me. _Anything_. Just… come home, Emma. Please. I miss you.”

Killian ran a frustrated hand through his hair as he dropped his forearms down to rest over the counter. He was becoming restless, and a part of his brain was telling him to get into his car and drive. It didn’t matter where he went, he just needed to be out there and looking for her, instead of stuck inside praying that she’d come back to him.

But the logical side of his mind knew that wasn’t the best idea. It was late, and he lived in a wealthy neighborhood. If he was seen driving around the streets that late at night he’d probably be stopped by the police. And knowing his luck, while he was explaining himself, Emma would slip back home, pack her things and leave him for good.

* * *

“Hey, this is Emma. I can’t take your call right now, but if you leave me a message I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks.”

“Jesus, Emma it’s _two am_. I checked your room. Everything’s still here. Where the hell are you? I just need to know that you’re okay. Can you at least give me that? Just let me know that you’re okay. _Please_.”

* * *

Killian wasn’t sure when he’d fallen asleep that evening, but the usual alarm he had set on his phone woke him with a start.

“Emma?” he called out, his voice rough from sleep and a lack of use. “Ems, are you here?”

When there was no reply he hauled himself to his feet, cringing at the way his muscles stretched themselves out of the awkward position he’d been sitting in, before he staggered up the stairs.

“Ems?” he tried again, even though he knew it was futile.

He pushed open the door to her room and all of his worst fears were confirmed when he found the space just as it had been left the day before.

Emma hadn’t come home that evening.

“Shit,” he cursed, taking his frustrations out on the door as he thumped his fists down onto it. Hard. “Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.”

He knew that he should jump in the shower and get ready for work, but acting was the last thing on his mind that morning. So instead, Killian fished out his phone once more, with the intention of calling in sick.

His fingers had scrolled down to Emma’s number and hit dial before he realized what he was doing. Killian raised the phone to his ear, praying that she would finally answer his call.

The click and familiar recording of her voicemail message was expected, but no less disappointing than it had been the day before.

“Ems. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I don’t wanna tell your inbox how I feel about you. So please… just come home,” he begged, before disconnecting the line.

Killian knew that he should call the studio next and make some bullshit excuse as to why he wouldn’t be in that day. Telling them that his plan was to sit at home and hope that his best friend tried to sneak back in while she thought he was out, wouldn’t go down well. But he couldn’t face the idea of talking to anyone that wasn’t Emma at that moment. So he took the easy way out and tapped out a message letting everyone know that he was sick, and would be back on set as soon as it had passed.

He didn’t tell them that the sickness was eating a hole through his heart. One that he was sure would _never_ pass if Emma didn’t come back home to him.

“Ugh. You really fucked this one up, Killian,” he mumbled to himself, as he slid down the wall just outside of her room. “You’re such a fucking idiot.”

His head fell back against the plaster with a dull thud, and Killian welcomed the spark of pain it brought with it. At least that was a more manageable kind of pain than the one building inside of his chest.

_Fuck! What was he going to do without Emma in his life?_

Killian couldn’t remember a time where she hadn’t been by his side. Everything before her had faded into insignificance. Hell, the only people still in his life that he’d known longer than Emma were related to him, and they all lived on the other side of the world.

In one night, he’d managed to ruin the _only_ thing he had going for himself. The only relationship that had gotten him out of bed every morning.

“You’re such a stupid fucking idiot,” he told himself, as he brought his arm up to cover his eyes.

Killian hadn’t cried in years. Not since that night that he’d caught Milah cheating on him. Not since the night that Emma had flown across the country to hold him in her arms, as he screamed and cried and screamed some more.

And now she was gone.

And that stung him more than any of the shit that he’d been through in the last three years.

* * *

Killian didn’t dare risk taking a shower that morning. Instead, he made his way back downstairs to clean up the mess in his lounge and make himself some coffee. Then he parked himself on the sofa to watch some daytime television as he waited to see if Emma would return.

When the lunchtime news began, he pulled out his phone once more and dialed her number, but hung up when her voicemail clicked in. He was fed up of talking to her machine, and he would _not_ tell her that he loved her too in a voicemail message. He was better than that.

Emma deserved better than that.

An hour later he pulled up the details for her family home and contemplated calling them to see if they had heard from her. But he didn’t want to panic Emma’s parents for no reason, and he certainly wasn’t ready to explain to David why the man’s only daughter wasn’t talking to him.

Besides, he knew Emma well enough to know that she wouldn’t have run home. Emma liked to run away from her problems and deal with them alone. The last thing she’d want would be her mother hovering around her while she was upset, as her father contemplated murder.

So he dismissed the Nolan family’s details in favor of pulling up a blank page on his internet browser.

If Emma had run to deal with her feelings, then she would go somewhere she knew she could be alone. Somewhere close, because she wouldn’t want to give up her place on the Spielberg piece, and she wouldn’t want the hefty fine that came with buying her way out of her contract.

Given that she’d left all of her stuff at his house, Killian knew there was really only one place she could have run to.

When his blank browser page had loaded, he typed in four simple words and then hit search.

* * *

Emma woke with a start and for a moment, panic filled her body as she tried to recall where she was and why. It took her far longer than it should have to recognize the walls around her and even longer to recall why she was there. But the moment those memories came flooding back, she almost wished they hadn’t.

She’d told Killian how she felt about him!

And he’d said absolutely nothing in return.

She thought his rejection would be bad. But his silence was even worse.

It was that moment when she knew that she’d ruined everything. Their friendship would never be the same again. So she’d left before Killian could throw her out.

She thought she’d cried herself out the night before. The guy sat next to her on the flight home had been incredibly concerned at just how long her tears had fallen for. But as she pushed herself up to sit against the headboard, Emma felt the tears begin to form once more, as her eyes landed on the picture of herself and Killian sat on her nightstand.

_What the hell had she been thinking?_

Her relationship with Killian was one of the best things she had in her life. And she’d ruined it. She’d ruined it all.

Emma had no idea how she’d ever be able to face him again.

“You’re such an idiot,” she whispered to herself.

When she’d revealed her feelings for him the night before, she’d been sure that nothing could possibly hurt the way that wanting someone you couldn’t have hurt. But now she knew that she’d been wrong.

_This_ hurt more. That empty space in her chest that Killian used to fill, hurt more than she ever thought it would. And at that moment, Emma wasn’t sure how she was ever going to make it stop.

If only she could go back and tell herself to keep quiet. She’d take being friend-zoned for the rest of her life, over not having Killian by her side every single day.

God how she wished she could take it back!

The knock on her front door had her groaning in pain. The noise seemed to echo through the hollowness inside of her, making everything feel worse.

“Go away,” she mumbled into her pillow, hoping that whoever was on the other side would take a hint when they realized how quiet the apartment was.

But the knocking started again, louder and harder than it had been before.

“Go away,” she called out louder this time. At least if they couldn’t take a hint, they would hopefully respect her wishes and leave.

But the knocking only appeared to grow faster, a constant pounding on the wooden door that seemed to echo through her head until she felt like she was at her breaking point.

Emma threw off the duvet covering her legs and stormed down the hallway towards her front door.

“What part of ‘go away’ don’t you fucking understand?” she yelled, as she wrenched it open.

But when her eyes landed on the familiar, if-slightly-disheveled looking figure on the other side, all of the fight left her body as she whispered, “Killian? Wha… what are you doing here?”

**Author's Note:**

> **Thanks for reading.**


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